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Greetings from Augusta
I'm back down south visiting for a couple weeks. It's strange being back in this town. It's only been a few years, but it feels like it was a lifetime ago. I pass places I used to frequent and they only seem vaguely familiar, like something I once saw in a dream. Being back in this house is particularly surreal. Some things are covered in dust but exactly where I left them.
I plan to see some friends while I'm here and do a bit of that drinking thing, but mostly this visit was for Sierra to see Tim and for me to donate/trash/sell all their old kid stuff and pick up a few personal things I forgot. I'm attempting to get the latter done as quickly as possible to move onto the lols, but this trip down memory lane is overwhelming and a bit sad at times. In my old closet I found an ex-boyfriend box. I couldn't help but read through some of the old notes and love poems while the whatifs danced around inside my head. Oh how I long to be once again full of innocence, youth, hormones, and passion. I also found my prom dress and some costumes from my theater days. The girls old rooms haven't changed. Morgan's still has a blue ceiling with glow-in-the-dark stars on it, little fairy wall decals, and a shelf of random scattered kid toys she's long outgrown. In another room, a door mirror leaning against a wall still has tiny fingerprints on it. As soon as I saw it, I remembered knocking it off the door when I slammed it during a meltdown after Jaime died. In the laundry room, there's a giant pile of baby toys, clothes, and furniture which was moved out of a spare bedroom at some point. I've started whittling away at that tonight. I didn't get very far. Memories keep popping out from every corner and fucking with me, so I just keep leaving to go outside and grab a smoke while I ponder.
BTW, southern flying cockroaches still creep me the fuck out.
On a less melancholy note, I also found some special things I'd long forgotten, including a locket from my high school sweetheart, a bunch of pictures, some VHS tapes of old parties and family movies, a raggedy babydoll I've had since I was an infant, and a mysterious roll of undeveloped film. haha film? Do I... get it developed? Think I just might. I hope it's nothing that gets me arrested.
We've had a packed couple of days. Just got here yesterday, but I feel like I've been here a week already. Tomorrow should be packed as well assuming I can actually wake up on time. Not sure why I'm still awake. I guess I'm just waiting for all the whatifs to crawl out of my ears for tonight.
I plan to see some friends while I'm here and do a bit of that drinking thing, but mostly this visit was for Sierra to see Tim and for me to donate/trash/sell all their old kid stuff and pick up a few personal things I forgot. I'm attempting to get the latter done as quickly as possible to move onto the lols, but this trip down memory lane is overwhelming and a bit sad at times. In my old closet I found an ex-boyfriend box. I couldn't help but read through some of the old notes and love poems while the whatifs danced around inside my head. Oh how I long to be once again full of innocence, youth, hormones, and passion. I also found my prom dress and some costumes from my theater days. The girls old rooms haven't changed. Morgan's still has a blue ceiling with glow-in-the-dark stars on it, little fairy wall decals, and a shelf of random scattered kid toys she's long outgrown. In another room, a door mirror leaning against a wall still has tiny fingerprints on it. As soon as I saw it, I remembered knocking it off the door when I slammed it during a meltdown after Jaime died. In the laundry room, there's a giant pile of baby toys, clothes, and furniture which was moved out of a spare bedroom at some point. I've started whittling away at that tonight. I didn't get very far. Memories keep popping out from every corner and fucking with me, so I just keep leaving to go outside and grab a smoke while I ponder.
BTW, southern flying cockroaches still creep me the fuck out.
On a less melancholy note, I also found some special things I'd long forgotten, including a locket from my high school sweetheart, a bunch of pictures, some VHS tapes of old parties and family movies, a raggedy babydoll I've had since I was an infant, and a mysterious roll of undeveloped film. haha film? Do I... get it developed? Think I just might. I hope it's nothing that gets me arrested.
We've had a packed couple of days. Just got here yesterday, but I feel like I've been here a week already. Tomorrow should be packed as well assuming I can actually wake up on time. Not sure why I'm still awake. I guess I'm just waiting for all the whatifs to crawl out of my ears for tonight.