(no subject)
So my professor likes to make a big deal of creating a community of learners, and reminds us how the people in our classes are going to be our colleagues for the rest of our lives. So it would make sense that I would friend them on a social networking site, right? Even if I haven't necessarily hung out with them? However, in light of a recent event, I noticed that I had friended one of my classmates a few times, and she still hadn't accepted my request, and had ignored my latest, but was friends with nearly everyone else in our class. Not really understanding at all, I sent her this message:
Me: Did i do something to offend you? I thought it was just a fluke, but i think i have friended you 3 or 4 times, to no avail. am i missing something? I don't want to make a big deal of it, but I can't help but feel as though you are deliberately ignoring my requests, which I don't quite understand because I didn't think there were any problems between us.
Them: You didn't offend me, I just feel like our interactions haven't been overwhelmingly positive.
It's such a terrible feeling to know that someone thinks you're negative, especially when their only experiences with you have been in a classroom. I must really be an asshole in class. And it sucks because it's exactly what I have been thinking lately. Everyone in class is making really good friends, and I'm either invited to things because of my roommates, or I guess my presence is just tolerated. Apparently some think I'm not even worth being friends with on facebook. Yes, I have friends here, but only because I go out places alone and meet people randomly. I can't say I am really close with any of my classmates. It feels like the beginning of high school all over again, when I barely had friends, and the only time we did things was when I initiated them, noone ever called me with plans.
Even my roommates seem to have a bond they don't care to share with me. They do things like talk about ordering food right in front of my face, and not even offer me the menu. They go out to bars together, never once inviting me along. I feel like I go out of my way to include them, I offer them food when I order, or when I make it. I ask them if they want to go out when I go, or ask if they need anything if I'm headed to a store.
Am I that bad a person?
I just want to go home, where I know who my friends are, and I don't feel like such an outsider. I hate this feeling of not being liked.
Me: Did i do something to offend you? I thought it was just a fluke, but i think i have friended you 3 or 4 times, to no avail. am i missing something? I don't want to make a big deal of it, but I can't help but feel as though you are deliberately ignoring my requests, which I don't quite understand because I didn't think there were any problems between us.
Them: You didn't offend me, I just feel like our interactions haven't been overwhelmingly positive.
It's such a terrible feeling to know that someone thinks you're negative, especially when their only experiences with you have been in a classroom. I must really be an asshole in class. And it sucks because it's exactly what I have been thinking lately. Everyone in class is making really good friends, and I'm either invited to things because of my roommates, or I guess my presence is just tolerated. Apparently some think I'm not even worth being friends with on facebook. Yes, I have friends here, but only because I go out places alone and meet people randomly. I can't say I am really close with any of my classmates. It feels like the beginning of high school all over again, when I barely had friends, and the only time we did things was when I initiated them, noone ever called me with plans.
Even my roommates seem to have a bond they don't care to share with me. They do things like talk about ordering food right in front of my face, and not even offer me the menu. They go out to bars together, never once inviting me along. I feel like I go out of my way to include them, I offer them food when I order, or when I make it. I ask them if they want to go out when I go, or ask if they need anything if I'm headed to a store.
Am I that bad a person?
I just want to go home, where I know who my friends are, and I don't feel like such an outsider. I hate this feeling of not being liked.