What Would You Like From Me?
I'm sitting here. Utterly exhausted. I'm in one of those "overwhelming" school modes, where I feel like the world is caving in on me. It's not, but that doesn't matter. It's all subjective mind-crap.
I'm staying afloat this semester, just like all the rest. I worry about work, but it gets done. And it gets done relatively well. Multiple professors say I have "potential", whatever the hell that means. Potential for a good job? For creating a wonderful family? Potential to not commit mass-genocide? I dislike blanket terms, sometimes. Other times, I hide behind them. Very well.
I have befriended a professor, which is a step-up for me. She's nice, and seems to think I am too. We talk about work, and life in general.
I went home for the first time this weekend. It was uneventful. I spent my time sprawled in front of my television watching "Law and Order: SVU". Love the show, but I watched way too many episodes. I took my car to the shop, and he got fixed up. It was glorious seeing my dog, but he smelled like complete and utter ass. I still let him up on the couch.
When I'm home, I get very nostalgic. I think about missed opportunities and sometimes they are painful. This weekend was no exception. I just kept thinking about music. If I really want music to be my life, why didn't I put my mind to it? If I kept singing and playing guitar as much as I did in high school, there's no telling where I could be right now. I could be so much more than this. But, no. The closest I can come to is being a lackey for bands that come on my radio show. I get to regret my choices everytime they come on. Don't get me wrong, I love what I do...But I'd give anything to switch places. I figure the best thing I can do is just immerse myself in the industry, and hopefully, something will come out of my experiences. Radio show is going really well, by the way. When I said I wanted to become big, this is what I imagined. We have connections out the ass, and it's a beautiful thing.
I'm interning next semester. Probably at WDST (100.1FM) out of Woodstock. It's a good 45 minute commute, but it's better than going to stupid classes that I don't care about. I heard it's run by hippies, and that's not very exciting. But I guess they get free doughnuts. That's fun. The reason why I applied is because they're independently-owned, and I like that a lot. It's kind of ironic, because my other internship option is for Clear Channel. They are the polar opposite of WDST. But, they're 5 minutes away. Like I said, I'm still leaning towards Woodstock.
I am not going to talk about any relationships I may or may not be currently involved in.
I miss my friends from home.
For the first time in a year and a half, I feel as though I do not have a place as an RA in my building. Everyone is consumed with school, going abroad, or other people. Maybe if I liked country music, things would be different. It's not like I am not doing my part...I got an "honorable mention" for programming this semester. I think that's super. They still love me, it's just that they're neglecting me.
Whenever I miss class, I feel extremely guilty. This includes when I am deathly ill, or 2 hours away from school.
I can't wait for college basketball to start again.
If you think I'm neglecting you, I'm not. I am completely overwhelmed right now.
I'm thinking of writing a book. I think I have an editor.
If you people even read this, let me know.
I'm staying afloat this semester, just like all the rest. I worry about work, but it gets done. And it gets done relatively well. Multiple professors say I have "potential", whatever the hell that means. Potential for a good job? For creating a wonderful family? Potential to not commit mass-genocide? I dislike blanket terms, sometimes. Other times, I hide behind them. Very well.
I have befriended a professor, which is a step-up for me. She's nice, and seems to think I am too. We talk about work, and life in general.
I went home for the first time this weekend. It was uneventful. I spent my time sprawled in front of my television watching "Law and Order: SVU". Love the show, but I watched way too many episodes. I took my car to the shop, and he got fixed up. It was glorious seeing my dog, but he smelled like complete and utter ass. I still let him up on the couch.
When I'm home, I get very nostalgic. I think about missed opportunities and sometimes they are painful. This weekend was no exception. I just kept thinking about music. If I really want music to be my life, why didn't I put my mind to it? If I kept singing and playing guitar as much as I did in high school, there's no telling where I could be right now. I could be so much more than this. But, no. The closest I can come to is being a lackey for bands that come on my radio show. I get to regret my choices everytime they come on. Don't get me wrong, I love what I do...But I'd give anything to switch places. I figure the best thing I can do is just immerse myself in the industry, and hopefully, something will come out of my experiences. Radio show is going really well, by the way. When I said I wanted to become big, this is what I imagined. We have connections out the ass, and it's a beautiful thing.
I'm interning next semester. Probably at WDST (100.1FM) out of Woodstock. It's a good 45 minute commute, but it's better than going to stupid classes that I don't care about. I heard it's run by hippies, and that's not very exciting. But I guess they get free doughnuts. That's fun. The reason why I applied is because they're independently-owned, and I like that a lot. It's kind of ironic, because my other internship option is for Clear Channel. They are the polar opposite of WDST. But, they're 5 minutes away. Like I said, I'm still leaning towards Woodstock.
I am not going to talk about any relationships I may or may not be currently involved in.
I miss my friends from home.
For the first time in a year and a half, I feel as though I do not have a place as an RA in my building. Everyone is consumed with school, going abroad, or other people. Maybe if I liked country music, things would be different. It's not like I am not doing my part...I got an "honorable mention" for programming this semester. I think that's super. They still love me, it's just that they're neglecting me.
Whenever I miss class, I feel extremely guilty. This includes when I am deathly ill, or 2 hours away from school.
I can't wait for college basketball to start again.
If you think I'm neglecting you, I'm not. I am completely overwhelmed right now.
I'm thinking of writing a book. I think I have an editor.
If you people even read this, let me know.