attention..

[jesussss]

so, you might think that hearing what you want to hear will make things better... but i feel just about the same, barely any better at all. maybe it depends on the way it's said, or the meaning behind it.

i guess i truly desire someone to actually like me for who i am, and accept me.
i don't want to feel not good enough.
or shy around their friends.
or just worried constantly.

but that's what i get. and that's what i have to live with.

i don't feel as jealous of everyone anymore.
now i'm just apathetic.

but vanity and self-loathing just make me go in circles.

i guess not everyone is bad...

and i guess not everyone thinks i'm good.