what am i supposed to do...without my very best friends?
well it is official, kara and sarah are at college now. i am the last person to leave. i have 5 days. that is all. but they are gone. today was rough because i finally came to the realization that i am all alone here pretty much.it really sucks. i don't really have anyone i can turn to right now (not that i should need someone within the next 5 days) but it is still a really scary thought. it is hard knowing that nothing is the same anymore. it was really tough when i called kara today and i knew that everyone was having fun without me. i wasn't mad at them for having fun without me there. i was mad at myself for not being able to go. see gas prices are too freaking high. so i had to choose if i would be driving to college or to see kara.and i love kara but i gotta get to school.
it has been really hard to deal with them all being gone either way.not to mention i had to ride with possibly the two most humiliatingly stupid human beings i have ever been around.i swore to myself that i wouldn't ever put myself in that situation ever again. and i won't.i am not easily embarrassed often but i felt my IQ drop in the 30 minute ride i shared with them. i came home and read a book just to battle the symptoms.
oh and i introduced someone to the wonderful world of...(dun dun DUN) SARCASM!i went to the christian book store today to pick up a track for a song i am singing at church on sunday, and i was looking around and i noticed that this girl who worked at the store was following me around. well it is disconcerting to say the least when someone is following you. anywho, she finally asked me about my lip ring. (i have my lip pierced for those who haven't seen me in awhile.) so i told her it felt better than the time i did heroin which was a real doosey. she looked at me like she wanted to scream. it was then that i told her i was kidding and i am sorry that she doesn't understand my humor. she laughed like five minutes later. oh geez. then she wanted to know all about tattoos and piercings like i am a freaking expert. i mean i have three of each if you aren't counting my ear piercings (which i don't if i did i would have 15 holes/piercings in my body). you can't even see my tats. so it was wierd. i don't her i got them in jail. then she looked at me and realized i was doing that new sarcastic thing again. she said we should hang out sometime but i am afraid to because i am so sarcastic.and if she can't understand it then we are no where.....lol.
i went to kareoke last night and had fun as always.but it will be probably one of the last times i get to go for awhile. i leave this thursday (i am craving a dr.pepper so freaking bad!) so i can't go much. plus i do have class on fridays. anyways.i am going to shakespeare in the park with my friend bobby on sunday so i am excited about that. it just seems like something college kids should do. plus i love shakespeare.lol. maybe we will grab some starbucks and go. iced caramel macchiatto please! lol. (still craving that darn dr.pepper.)
i have in fact improved on my profanity and i do not smoke anymore, thank you thank you.i have been working on this because i don't feel either are attractive qualities in males therefore i cannot ask them to be attracted to something i do that i feel is unattractive. the end of that.
new topic (i realize i am skipping around but i have done alot of thinking today.) i personally don't understand how anyone could not want to be a mother.i know why some wouldn't but i just think that for me i could do nothing greater than to be the mother of a child. be it my own or adopted. i just can't wait till i get there because i can't wait to be the giver of the kind of unconditional love my mom has shown me.it is just great.
now back around to some other things i have been thinking of: gay marrige.
this has been on my mind alot because i have so many gay friends. and i have come to this conclusion: i cannot and will not tell someone who they can and cannot love. it isn't right. the thing about love is you aren't supposed to have control over it.period.now on the political stand point i think it would boost the economy slightly to allow homosexual civil unions/marriges. more people/couples would pay for marrige counceling, licences, divorce lawyers and so on. plus i think that after we allow gay marrige we should allow gay couples to adopt. this is because i think it is discusting that our nation would rather see children sexually abused, mistreated, without families or people who care for them than in a home with two moms or dads. i think that our minds have stopped functioning if we see that as a better option than offering a child the chance to be loved by two parents.agree with me or not but i see it THIS way.this is coming from ceci the political activist, not ceci the down home christian girl. but none the less, jesus didn't create violent displays of how being a prostitute was a sin, he said things like let he who is without sin cast the first stone, and he demonstrated through example that everyone deserves love. he lived by example, not by stones.
wow this has been one of the most productive journals i have done in a long time. i haven't really had the chance to just sit down and write nothing but how i felt on a topic and it feels good.
well ya'll have a good day and make sure to leave comments. i am about to start cleaning up my friends list.
oh and can someone explain tags and how to do lj cuts please? i am computer illiterate. heck i just can't spell.
it has been really hard to deal with them all being gone either way.not to mention i had to ride with possibly the two most humiliatingly stupid human beings i have ever been around.i swore to myself that i wouldn't ever put myself in that situation ever again. and i won't.i am not easily embarrassed often but i felt my IQ drop in the 30 minute ride i shared with them. i came home and read a book just to battle the symptoms.
oh and i introduced someone to the wonderful world of...(dun dun DUN) SARCASM!i went to the christian book store today to pick up a track for a song i am singing at church on sunday, and i was looking around and i noticed that this girl who worked at the store was following me around. well it is disconcerting to say the least when someone is following you. anywho, she finally asked me about my lip ring. (i have my lip pierced for those who haven't seen me in awhile.) so i told her it felt better than the time i did heroin which was a real doosey. she looked at me like she wanted to scream. it was then that i told her i was kidding and i am sorry that she doesn't understand my humor. she laughed like five minutes later. oh geez. then she wanted to know all about tattoos and piercings like i am a freaking expert. i mean i have three of each if you aren't counting my ear piercings (which i don't if i did i would have 15 holes/piercings in my body). you can't even see my tats. so it was wierd. i don't her i got them in jail. then she looked at me and realized i was doing that new sarcastic thing again. she said we should hang out sometime but i am afraid to because i am so sarcastic.and if she can't understand it then we are no where.....lol.
i went to kareoke last night and had fun as always.but it will be probably one of the last times i get to go for awhile. i leave this thursday (i am craving a dr.pepper so freaking bad!) so i can't go much. plus i do have class on fridays. anyways.i am going to shakespeare in the park with my friend bobby on sunday so i am excited about that. it just seems like something college kids should do. plus i love shakespeare.lol. maybe we will grab some starbucks and go. iced caramel macchiatto please! lol. (still craving that darn dr.pepper.)
i have in fact improved on my profanity and i do not smoke anymore, thank you thank you.i have been working on this because i don't feel either are attractive qualities in males therefore i cannot ask them to be attracted to something i do that i feel is unattractive. the end of that.
new topic (i realize i am skipping around but i have done alot of thinking today.) i personally don't understand how anyone could not want to be a mother.i know why some wouldn't but i just think that for me i could do nothing greater than to be the mother of a child. be it my own or adopted. i just can't wait till i get there because i can't wait to be the giver of the kind of unconditional love my mom has shown me.it is just great.
now back around to some other things i have been thinking of: gay marrige.
this has been on my mind alot because i have so many gay friends. and i have come to this conclusion: i cannot and will not tell someone who they can and cannot love. it isn't right. the thing about love is you aren't supposed to have control over it.period.now on the political stand point i think it would boost the economy slightly to allow homosexual civil unions/marriges. more people/couples would pay for marrige counceling, licences, divorce lawyers and so on. plus i think that after we allow gay marrige we should allow gay couples to adopt. this is because i think it is discusting that our nation would rather see children sexually abused, mistreated, without families or people who care for them than in a home with two moms or dads. i think that our minds have stopped functioning if we see that as a better option than offering a child the chance to be loved by two parents.agree with me or not but i see it THIS way.this is coming from ceci the political activist, not ceci the down home christian girl. but none the less, jesus didn't create violent displays of how being a prostitute was a sin, he said things like let he who is without sin cast the first stone, and he demonstrated through example that everyone deserves love. he lived by example, not by stones.
wow this has been one of the most productive journals i have done in a long time. i haven't really had the chance to just sit down and write nothing but how i felt on a topic and it feels good.
well ya'll have a good day and make sure to leave comments. i am about to start cleaning up my friends list.
oh and can someone explain tags and how to do lj cuts please? i am computer illiterate. heck i just can't spell.