You Are Not Your Yesterday: Chapter Nine: Tougher Than the Rest
Title: You Are Not Your Yesterday
by Jesterlady
Pairing: Robin/Regina
Summary: At the end of S5, Robin has died and his soul is saved from destruction by the Greek god Zeus, but he is presumed gone forever. Regina is devastated with grief and struggling with her own darkness. After she removes her evil half, the Evil Queen doppelganger begins to wreak havoc on everyone in Storybrooke, finally making a wish that creates a whole new realm and provides a way for Zeus to send Robin’s soul into an alternate self. But this Robin doesn’t know who he is, having an alternate set of villainous memories. When he and Regina meet again, they must struggle with the disconnect and longing they both feel. Can he reclaim his heroic self? Can Regina accept her own dark past and defeat the Evil Queen? And can their true love win through the trials that would reunite them?
Disclaimer: I don't own OUAT. Some lines are from the show. The title is from Ann Voskamp
I really thought the show missed the mark with the return of Robin Hood on the show. So I wanted to take this opportunity to write the story in the way that made sense to me.
I wanted to focus on Zelena and Regina’s relationship here as well, making it a lot more intentional than canon. I think Zelena provides a great foil for Regina’s growth, and I think Zelena’s character deserves better. It provided a way for me to delve into Regina’s growth, her understanding and acceptance of redemption, and how she will continue to be strong and fight. In allowing Robin to go through his own villainous redemption, it gave them an equal ground they hadn’t been able to share before.
I have strong feelings about the Wish Realm. Apart from the its creation, I hated how it was used (so illogical)! So just to be clear, in this story the Wish Realm is not real. Only Robin (with a real soul inside him) can come through to the other side; it collapses as soon as Emma (the point of it) leaves. We see this as Wish Rumple tries to leave and wasn’t able to. This also explains why Robin (and characters connected to him) were young when everyone else had aged.
You definitely need to be familiar with S6 to read this fic. I do ignore a lot of S6 ie Gideon and Black Fairy. You can assume those things are happening alongside of the main events, but I’m ignoring it and deliberately changing where it intersects, because the story needed to focus on Robin and Regina and have a resolved ending that didn’t immediately jump into the next problem.
Regina followed Emma as she led the way to find this realm’s Pinocchio. She was glad to follow, because she had no mental power for leading at the moment. Standing outside the hut, Emma cautioned her to stay back until they knew it was safe. With the whole kingdom wanting Regina’s head on a pike, she couldn’t disagree with the advice.
Unfortunately, it gave her plenty of time to focus on Robin’s empty gaze and Henry’s murderous eyes. She was starting to feel like everything she’d found by coming to this place was unraveling around her. Oh, she was still ready to fight her evil self, still ready to begin anew, but could she really do that before she’d fully laid to rest the ghosts of her past? This world wasn’t real, but it was a possibility, one that showed Regina how much better a world without her was. That didn’t sit well with her.
She watched Pinocchio hug Emma, and bitterly pondered how no one in this world had been happy to see her, not even the people she loved the most.
After Emma motioned her forward, Regina shook her dark thoughts as best she could and joined them inside Pinocchio’s shop where Pinocchio heard them out and actually believed their story.
“What can a simple wood carver do for you?” he asked.
“Carve wood and get us home,” Emma replied. “Your father once made a magical wardrobe. It took me between realms.”
“My father passed.”
“Years ago-I know. I have all of Princess Emma's memories too, and I'm sorry. I was hoping that maybe you still have that wardrobe.”
“I remember the one you speak about. But I dismantled it years ago. It reminded me of darker times. No offense,” he said, bowing in Regina’s direction.
She huffed out a laugh.
“None taken. This world became oh-so-much better after I was gone.”
Regina ignored Emma’s look and stepped toward the back of the room. Parchment and quill were there. Regina looked at Emma, at her shiny determination to get home, and Regina could muster none of it. No, she needed answers before she could partake in any fight. Besides, back home needed the Savior right now. Regina wasn’t giving up; she was just creating a new path for herself.
Regina wrote quickly, charmed at how the skill of writing with a quill seemed to float back to her hands, despite the many years since that had been her norm. The words flowed out of her as well, her heart’s cry, a message she knew Emma would understand, if not agree with.
Do what you must to find a way home with Pinocchio. I’m sorry I can’t help. But I can't come back till I have a question answered. I know Robin isn't real here. But I need to know if-like everything else in this realm-is he better off without me?
---
Robin felt rather satisfied with the events of the day, yet, there was something gnawing at his stomach, some kind of warning that he couldn’t understand. He didn’t know what was so different about a simple robbery, but there had been a strange look in the dark-haired woman’s eyes as she’d handed her necklace over to him. She’d been strangely dressed, though obviously wealthy, but she’d spoken his name as if she knew him. He knew he’d never seen her before, but there was something familiar all the same. Or maybe it was just a normal attraction.
Either way, he wasn’t going to let it occupy his mind for too long. That way lay madness. So he got his dinner and settled in with his drink, fully prepared to let it go. Until he heard screaming and shouts about the Evil Queen coming. People fled in all directions, even through the open windows. Robin sat quietly. He’d heard tale she had returned, though she’d been banished when he was only a small boy. What she would want with him, he didn’t know, but he was the only person in the tavern she’d be coming for. What was the point of running?
“Is it too much to hope you're here to buy me a drink?” he asked as he listened to her walk toward him. She rounded in front of him and he stared. It was the dark-haired woman from the robbery. “So, you're the Evil Queen.” Well, in one way, that made everything easy. “I presume you're here to take back the necklace that I stole.”
“Uh, actually, no,” she said, sounding nervous. She cleared her throat and sat down. “I'm here to talk to you.”
He was more curious and intrigued than ever.
“One doesn't usually come to a tavern for talking,” he said.
There was a pause and then she sucked in a breath and searched his face.
“Are you happy?”
He didn’t particularly want to answer that question.
“You're a strange one,” he said, distracting himself from his own feelings on the subject.
“Are you?”
He laid his hands on the table in light of her persistence. That didn’t mean he was going to tell all to this stranger, no matter how unsettled she made him feel.
“As a matter of fact, my life's great. I have work that I adore, I answer to no man, and I sleep under the stars. Who could ask for more?”
Her face was a contradiction to study, elements of relief mixed with an overwhelming sadness and regret.
“So, you were better off,” she concluded.
“Pardon?”
“Thanks for telling me,” she said, her voice tight, and she rose to leave.
Robin sat dumbfounded for a moment before quickly rising and walking after her. He should let it go; he should ignore the urging from his gut to dig into her sadness about him. But he couldn’t.
“Wait, what's this about? Why would you care about my happiness? You can tell me.”
She studied his face and appeared to reach some kind of decision. He felt oddly relieved she was about to talk as she opened her mouth.
Naturally that’s when the devil walked into the room and slapped a black band around her wrist.
“Nottingham,” Robin said casually, ignoring the murderous rage he usually felt at the sight of his enemy. “Always good to see you.”
“Well, the pleasure is all mine. At last, the most wanted man in all the land is as he should be. And I see that we have a little bonus.” The Queen lifted her hand as if to fight and then felt at the band on her wrist. “Oh, I'm sorry, m'lady, but here in Sherwood Forest, we're prepared for the likes of you.” Nottingham tapped the band. “Away with them.”
Robin let himself be led away in resignation. He should have stuck with his gut.
---
Regina found herself stuck in an iron cage, Robin at her side, and her magic useless. It was not exactly how she’d predicted her afternoon would go. On the other hand, she had gotten a blatant answer to her burning question. Now she could leave this world knowing that the only place she belonged was righting the wrongs that she’d created.
And when she did leave, this world that had been so good without her in it-which she’d already made worse-wouldn’t exist any longer. It still hurt to look at the Robin sitting beside her, the one she’d endangered.
“I am so sorry about all this,” she said softly. “I never meant for you to get hurt.”
“Yes, well, then you failed with flying colors,” he replied. “Now I'm going to die for nothing, having accomplished nothing.”
She didn’t know why he would say such a thing.
“Not true. You're Robin Hood. Think of all the people you've helped.”
His face turned toward her blankly.
“Robin Hood? No, I am Robin of Locksley, and I'm a thief.”
“A thief who steals from the rich and gives to the poor.”
“Gives to the poor? Why the hell would I do that?”
This didn’t make sense at all. Why would he be like this when everyone else was so much better off?
“Wait. So you're telling me you're just a common thief?”
He bristled under her words.
“I am not a ‘common’ anything. I steal from the rich to make myself rich.”
She studied his face, trying to figure out what could have changed him.
“And that makes you happy? No, I don't believe it.” A sudden thought occurred to Regina, one that she would normally avoid. “It must be Marian.”
Robin’s eyes, dark and sad, turned on her, and Regina flinched under their gaze.
“What do you know of Marian?”
“Your wife.”
His head bowed, as if borne down by a weight he could no longer carry.
“No. She was never my wife. She . . . she died before we could marry.”
That explained a lot, but not everything. Regina wasn’t sure how to say anything of comfort. How did you comfort a fake dead lover about his fake dead almost-wife?
“I'm so sorry. So, there's no one?”
“No. Never.”
His short, purposeless words made Regina return to her original point.
“And even so, your life . . . it makes you happy?”
Robin looked at her and studied her face, as if deciding whether or not to trust her. She took the opportunity to memorize anew the planes of his face, knowing she didn’t have long with them before he was inevitably taken from her.
“That's not exactly what I said. That's what you said. If you want the truth, Your Majesty, I haven't been happy for a very long time.”
His words cast a shadow of sadness between them, and she ached to be able to reach out and touch him. But she couldn’t. He wouldn’t understand. And he wasn’t hers.
“You never had love,” she commented uselessly.
He laughed hollowly.
“I’ve had love more than any man should have. But I never got to keep it. And now I don’t deserve to.”
Regina stared at him, stunned into reverie, hearing the words she often used to describe herself coming from his mouth. It was the kind of moment that would be stamped inside her mind until she died. What it meant, she didn’t know, but she had the feeling many sleepless nights would be devoted to figuring it out.
Horses suddenly neighed in panic, and the sound of screams and swords clashing interrupted her thoughts.
“What was that?” he asked.
Regina listened and heard a familiar laugh on the wind. For once she loved hearing the sound.
“Oh, don't worry. I know who did that. He's on our side.”
Rumple soon appeared by their prison and magicked the gate open. Regina climbed out and remarked on his timing, asking for him to remove her magic cuff.
Of course, that’s when everything went wrong again and Regina found herself a new prisoner, captured by a Rumple who knew that it wasn’t really her who had caused this realm’s Belle to die, but was going to make her pay for it all the same.
---
Robin’s day had been getting worse by the moment, but now it was augmented by the fact that he was apparently not real. His entire trip to the dungeons of the Dark One was accompanied by conversation between the Evil Queen and said imp, implying lots of information that Robin found difficult to take in. On the one hand, it wasn’t as if it was outside the realm of possibility, but it stirred twinges of jealousy within Robin that he wasn’t aware still existed.
The Dark One excused himself to go and prepare torture devices or something equally ghastly and Robin decided to use the time to get a little clarification. While the Evil Queen, or Regina, as she kept insisting he call her, pounded on the door in vain, Robin helped himself to a seat on the admittedly uncomfortable cot. He had plans for it later.
“So,” Robin began, clearing his throat. “You're telling me I'm living in a fake world that's created by the wish of a princess who's not fake.”
“Well, it wasn't her wish exactly, but yes.”
“And in the real world, I'm some kind of folk hero, and the Evil Queen cared for me.” Robin put his hands behind his head, leaning against the wall. “Hmm, I'd say I did pretty well for myself.”
His nonchalance was putting her off guard, just as he intended. He’d get more information that way.
“Wait, that's it? You just believe me?”
“Do I believe that there's some other world where I'm living a completely different life, which, by the looks of things, is a hell of a lot better than this one? Yes, indeed. I don't mind believing that at all.” Her face was awash with remorse and something else that he couldn’t quite describe. There was something else about the other Robin she wasn’t telling him. “What? Am I a scoundrel over there, too?”
“No, you're not a scoundrel.” Her voice was gentle, fond, tender. He squirmed under it. She sat down beside him. “You're dead.”
That wasn’t news he got every day. Apparently, the real him was dead. So everything about himself, all the pain, misery, loss, and bloodshed didn’t mean a thing, not even to serve as a foil to a better version of himself.
Robin stood up with his back to her for a moment, before turning and attempting a casual tone.
“I see. And, uh, this other Robin, before he died, did he . . . did I have a good life?”
“I think so,” she said, standing, wiping a tear from her face. “I hope so. He helped a lot of people, which he was proud of. And he loved his friends and . . . family.”
Family, that was something he wondered about. Was it the same as the one he’d had here, the one he’d failed? She’d spoken of Marian, but then if the other him had been with Regina, that must have gone wrong somehow.
“And you,” he said softly, walking closer to her.
She stared at him and he wondered if she knew how much fearful longing she was displaying. For once, he had no desire to exploit it. There was something about her that made him long, too. Only he didn’t know for what.
“And me.”
But for all the longing pulsing between them, known and unknown, Robin didn’t have answers or resolution for either of them. All he had was the desire to help her. And himself, of course.
“Well, that sounds like it was a good life, even if it was too short.”
He moved past her before she could answer, giving her a chance to compose herself, and keeping him from doing something dangerous, like wiping her tears away himself. He dug into the cot, finding the tools he needed. Amazing really, how everything was useful if you gave it a chance.
“What are you doing?”
He focused his attention on the tumblers of the lock.
“Well, it's a little-known fact, but I'm not just the world's greatest thief.” The door clicked open and he gestured grandly for her. “Shall we, Your Majesty?”
She smiled and he found himself gratified to see it. For lack of anything better to do-not because it felt like she drew his gaze to wherever she was-he followed her as she led him through the castle, and out into the world that shouldn’t exist.
---
Regina cautiously led the way back to Pinocchio’s, not wanting to get into any more trouble, particularly when she still couldn’t use her magic.
“Regina, where did you go?” Emma as Regina slipped through the door. “Oh,” she said, as Robin entered behind Regina.
“I'm-I'm sorry I ran off, but we have to get out of here.” Regina held up her hand and Emma magicked the cuff off without even asking. Regina sighed in relief. “They're gonna be looking for us . . . sheriffs and knights and maybe Rumple, and-is that it?”
Regina pointed to the wooden structure gracing the back of the shop.
“This is it,” Pinocchio said proudly.
“That's how you're getting back?” Robin scoffed. “A tree?”
“A magic tree,” rejoined Pinocchio.
“Oh, well, forgive me,” Robin answered.
Emma looked at Regina apologetically, flicking her eyes to Robin.
“Regina, we do have to go.”
Regina nodded.
“Can you just give me a minute?” Regina walked back toward the door, Robin following, hoping for even a modicum of privacy. “Um, I'm so sorry I dragged you into this.”
Saying goodbye was harder than she thought. He wasn’t her Robin, but he was as close as she would ever get.
“I like an adventure,” he said. They stared at each other for a moment, and Regina couldn’t think of any words to say. She wanted to stay there forever, but that was not her fate. She was just about to turn and leave when he held out his hand. “Here. I want you to have this. So a piece of Robin is with you always.”
Regina held the feather reverently, awed at its existence. It was perfect, and she could only imagine it was an exact copy to the one Zelena had lost. It was the best gift he could have given her.
“Where did you get this?”
“It's my lucky feather. It's from a very lucky arrow.”
Regina was almost crying again and when he looked at her, nonplussed, with concern, she hastened to try to explain.
“When Robin . . . my Robin died, there was a feather that got lost on its way to me from him.”
“Funny coincidence,” he said. “I guess he wanted you to have a piece of himself, so this is just second best.”
She shook her head, realizing something important in the moment, but hardly knowing how to articulate it.
“No, because you see, he’s gone, completely gone. There’s nothing left. That’s the hardest part. But despite everything, I chose to believe and hope that he was in a good place. Maybe, I think, somehow . . . he lives on in you.
Something sad flashed across his face, something like shame.
“I don’t think the noble soul you described could live in such a vessel,” he said, gesturing to himself wryly.
“That’s not what I meant,” Regina said. She didn’t know how to respond. It certainly seemed like this Robin was a darkened version, but that alone was part of what made him so clearly different to everyone else in this world. “Perhaps a spark of him floated into this wish, that’s all I can hope for. It wasn’t meant to be anything against you.”
He gave her a half smile.
“It’s all right, Your Majesty. I take no offense.”
“Good,” she whispered, hungrily drinking him in.
Then she went back to Emma, who looked at her appraisingly.
“Regina, why don't you bring him?”
“He's not real. Emma, you said it yourself. This place was created by a wish. How could a wish become real?”
“Maybe it can,” Emma said, shrugging. “The feather. Robin's soul had to go somewhere. Maybe that's why he hasn't aged, why he's different. If you believe any part of him is in there, why walk away?”
Regina shook with her answer, the desire to grab him and never let go almost overwhelming. But the fear was overwhelming too, and the risk of having all hope turned to despair.
“Because, Emma, it's me. And I'm afraid of tempting fate.”
“No,” Emma said firmly. “We make our own fate. I did it, and now it's your turn.”
“Can the wardrobe even take three people?” Regina asked. “It could only do two before.”
“I made sure it was extra roomy,” Pinocchio said, winking.
There seemed to be no more excuses.
Regina stifled back her tears, afraid to even make the request. But then she turned back and Robin was standing right there.
“So . . . I'm in,” he said, his eyes trained on hers with an intensity she found hard to take.
“You are? It might not work.”
“Then again, it might,” he said, moving a step closer.
“You'd take the risk?”
She could hardly believe he was doing this for her and his initial answer confirmed it.
“Well, I don't know if you caught this, but, uh, things are looking pretty bleak for me here.” He stepped still closer. “And, you know, why not get to know the woman one version of me was willing to die for?”
Regina’s breath caught and she blinked at him, until Emma pulled on her arm, drawing her attention back where it should be.
Emma gave Pinocchio a goodbye hug and then stepped through the glowing portal made by the wardrobe.
The room began to shake and Regina looked around in confusion, until she realized that, since the subject of the wish was gone, this world was collapsing. They had to go now.
Regina smiled hesitantly at Robin.
“Shall we?” she said.
“After you, m’lady,” he said, bowing.
Regina held out her hand instead of moving forward. Robin stared at her, then slowly took her hand. She didn’t stop to examine how right it felt, she simply walked steadily toward the wardrobe.
Before they crossed the threshold, the door burst open and an impish cackle filled the air.
“Not so fast, dearie. We had an appointment.”
Regina felt arms fold around her, gripping tightly, while Robin’s hand was held fast in hers. She tripped under the force of the momentum and fell forward into the wardrobe, pulling Rumple and Robin with her. A swirling haze wrapped around her and she felt the arms fall away, melted and dissolved, it seemed. She couldn’t tell if Robin’s hand was still in hers.
And then she was standing in a dark forest, alone.
Emma’s voice called out for her and Regina looked up as Emma ran toward her.
“Regina? Are you okay? Where's Robin?”
Regina’s heart sank low and she couldn’t help but hate her fate. It hadn’t worked.
“I don't know. We fell in together. Rumple crashed the party, and he came too. I guess wishes can’t become reality.”
“I'm so sorry.”
“Can I-can I have a moment alone, please?”
Emma nodded, touching her hand to Regina’s, and said to join her when Regina was ready.
Regina walked aways from the tree that had potentially been her route back to knowing the man she loved, or at least a part of him. She stared out at the lights of the town she had created and was in charge of protecting.
She had to come to grips with the fact that no matter what she hoped, her destiny was fighting the darkness. Her destiny was fighting for the people she loved. Her destiny was learning to love herself despite her past.
And then there was the slightest whisper of a sound behind her and Regina turned.
He stood there, alive, solid, real. If she had been able to move, she might have rushed to greet him. As it was, all she could do was stare in disbelief. Then she looked wildly around for Rumple, but there was no imp to be found. He hadn’t come through, but Robin had. That had to mean something.
“Sorry, I’m late,” he said, walking casually toward her. “So, where exactly are we?”
A new beginning walked toward her dressed in the likeness of old love. Regina took a deep breath.
“Robin of Locksley, as Mayor, I'd like to officially welcome you to Storybrooke.”
by Jesterlady
Pairing: Robin/Regina
Summary: At the end of S5, Robin has died and his soul is saved from destruction by the Greek god Zeus, but he is presumed gone forever. Regina is devastated with grief and struggling with her own darkness. After she removes her evil half, the Evil Queen doppelganger begins to wreak havoc on everyone in Storybrooke, finally making a wish that creates a whole new realm and provides a way for Zeus to send Robin’s soul into an alternate self. But this Robin doesn’t know who he is, having an alternate set of villainous memories. When he and Regina meet again, they must struggle with the disconnect and longing they both feel. Can he reclaim his heroic self? Can Regina accept her own dark past and defeat the Evil Queen? And can their true love win through the trials that would reunite them?
Disclaimer: I don't own OUAT. Some lines are from the show. The title is from Ann Voskamp
I really thought the show missed the mark with the return of Robin Hood on the show. So I wanted to take this opportunity to write the story in the way that made sense to me.
I wanted to focus on Zelena and Regina’s relationship here as well, making it a lot more intentional than canon. I think Zelena provides a great foil for Regina’s growth, and I think Zelena’s character deserves better. It provided a way for me to delve into Regina’s growth, her understanding and acceptance of redemption, and how she will continue to be strong and fight. In allowing Robin to go through his own villainous redemption, it gave them an equal ground they hadn’t been able to share before.
I have strong feelings about the Wish Realm. Apart from the its creation, I hated how it was used (so illogical)! So just to be clear, in this story the Wish Realm is not real. Only Robin (with a real soul inside him) can come through to the other side; it collapses as soon as Emma (the point of it) leaves. We see this as Wish Rumple tries to leave and wasn’t able to. This also explains why Robin (and characters connected to him) were young when everyone else had aged.
You definitely need to be familiar with S6 to read this fic. I do ignore a lot of S6 ie Gideon and Black Fairy. You can assume those things are happening alongside of the main events, but I’m ignoring it and deliberately changing where it intersects, because the story needed to focus on Robin and Regina and have a resolved ending that didn’t immediately jump into the next problem.
Regina followed Emma as she led the way to find this realm’s Pinocchio. She was glad to follow, because she had no mental power for leading at the moment. Standing outside the hut, Emma cautioned her to stay back until they knew it was safe. With the whole kingdom wanting Regina’s head on a pike, she couldn’t disagree with the advice.
Unfortunately, it gave her plenty of time to focus on Robin’s empty gaze and Henry’s murderous eyes. She was starting to feel like everything she’d found by coming to this place was unraveling around her. Oh, she was still ready to fight her evil self, still ready to begin anew, but could she really do that before she’d fully laid to rest the ghosts of her past? This world wasn’t real, but it was a possibility, one that showed Regina how much better a world without her was. That didn’t sit well with her.
She watched Pinocchio hug Emma, and bitterly pondered how no one in this world had been happy to see her, not even the people she loved the most.
After Emma motioned her forward, Regina shook her dark thoughts as best she could and joined them inside Pinocchio’s shop where Pinocchio heard them out and actually believed their story.
“What can a simple wood carver do for you?” he asked.
“Carve wood and get us home,” Emma replied. “Your father once made a magical wardrobe. It took me between realms.”
“My father passed.”
“Years ago-I know. I have all of Princess Emma's memories too, and I'm sorry. I was hoping that maybe you still have that wardrobe.”
“I remember the one you speak about. But I dismantled it years ago. It reminded me of darker times. No offense,” he said, bowing in Regina’s direction.
She huffed out a laugh.
“None taken. This world became oh-so-much better after I was gone.”
Regina ignored Emma’s look and stepped toward the back of the room. Parchment and quill were there. Regina looked at Emma, at her shiny determination to get home, and Regina could muster none of it. No, she needed answers before she could partake in any fight. Besides, back home needed the Savior right now. Regina wasn’t giving up; she was just creating a new path for herself.
Regina wrote quickly, charmed at how the skill of writing with a quill seemed to float back to her hands, despite the many years since that had been her norm. The words flowed out of her as well, her heart’s cry, a message she knew Emma would understand, if not agree with.
Do what you must to find a way home with Pinocchio. I’m sorry I can’t help. But I can't come back till I have a question answered. I know Robin isn't real here. But I need to know if-like everything else in this realm-is he better off without me?
---
Robin felt rather satisfied with the events of the day, yet, there was something gnawing at his stomach, some kind of warning that he couldn’t understand. He didn’t know what was so different about a simple robbery, but there had been a strange look in the dark-haired woman’s eyes as she’d handed her necklace over to him. She’d been strangely dressed, though obviously wealthy, but she’d spoken his name as if she knew him. He knew he’d never seen her before, but there was something familiar all the same. Or maybe it was just a normal attraction.
Either way, he wasn’t going to let it occupy his mind for too long. That way lay madness. So he got his dinner and settled in with his drink, fully prepared to let it go. Until he heard screaming and shouts about the Evil Queen coming. People fled in all directions, even through the open windows. Robin sat quietly. He’d heard tale she had returned, though she’d been banished when he was only a small boy. What she would want with him, he didn’t know, but he was the only person in the tavern she’d be coming for. What was the point of running?
“Is it too much to hope you're here to buy me a drink?” he asked as he listened to her walk toward him. She rounded in front of him and he stared. It was the dark-haired woman from the robbery. “So, you're the Evil Queen.” Well, in one way, that made everything easy. “I presume you're here to take back the necklace that I stole.”
“Uh, actually, no,” she said, sounding nervous. She cleared her throat and sat down. “I'm here to talk to you.”
He was more curious and intrigued than ever.
“One doesn't usually come to a tavern for talking,” he said.
There was a pause and then she sucked in a breath and searched his face.
“Are you happy?”
He didn’t particularly want to answer that question.
“You're a strange one,” he said, distracting himself from his own feelings on the subject.
“Are you?”
He laid his hands on the table in light of her persistence. That didn’t mean he was going to tell all to this stranger, no matter how unsettled she made him feel.
“As a matter of fact, my life's great. I have work that I adore, I answer to no man, and I sleep under the stars. Who could ask for more?”
Her face was a contradiction to study, elements of relief mixed with an overwhelming sadness and regret.
“So, you were better off,” she concluded.
“Pardon?”
“Thanks for telling me,” she said, her voice tight, and she rose to leave.
Robin sat dumbfounded for a moment before quickly rising and walking after her. He should let it go; he should ignore the urging from his gut to dig into her sadness about him. But he couldn’t.
“Wait, what's this about? Why would you care about my happiness? You can tell me.”
She studied his face and appeared to reach some kind of decision. He felt oddly relieved she was about to talk as she opened her mouth.
Naturally that’s when the devil walked into the room and slapped a black band around her wrist.
“Nottingham,” Robin said casually, ignoring the murderous rage he usually felt at the sight of his enemy. “Always good to see you.”
“Well, the pleasure is all mine. At last, the most wanted man in all the land is as he should be. And I see that we have a little bonus.” The Queen lifted her hand as if to fight and then felt at the band on her wrist. “Oh, I'm sorry, m'lady, but here in Sherwood Forest, we're prepared for the likes of you.” Nottingham tapped the band. “Away with them.”
Robin let himself be led away in resignation. He should have stuck with his gut.
---
Regina found herself stuck in an iron cage, Robin at her side, and her magic useless. It was not exactly how she’d predicted her afternoon would go. On the other hand, she had gotten a blatant answer to her burning question. Now she could leave this world knowing that the only place she belonged was righting the wrongs that she’d created.
And when she did leave, this world that had been so good without her in it-which she’d already made worse-wouldn’t exist any longer. It still hurt to look at the Robin sitting beside her, the one she’d endangered.
“I am so sorry about all this,” she said softly. “I never meant for you to get hurt.”
“Yes, well, then you failed with flying colors,” he replied. “Now I'm going to die for nothing, having accomplished nothing.”
She didn’t know why he would say such a thing.
“Not true. You're Robin Hood. Think of all the people you've helped.”
His face turned toward her blankly.
“Robin Hood? No, I am Robin of Locksley, and I'm a thief.”
“A thief who steals from the rich and gives to the poor.”
“Gives to the poor? Why the hell would I do that?”
This didn’t make sense at all. Why would he be like this when everyone else was so much better off?
“Wait. So you're telling me you're just a common thief?”
He bristled under her words.
“I am not a ‘common’ anything. I steal from the rich to make myself rich.”
She studied his face, trying to figure out what could have changed him.
“And that makes you happy? No, I don't believe it.” A sudden thought occurred to Regina, one that she would normally avoid. “It must be Marian.”
Robin’s eyes, dark and sad, turned on her, and Regina flinched under their gaze.
“What do you know of Marian?”
“Your wife.”
His head bowed, as if borne down by a weight he could no longer carry.
“No. She was never my wife. She . . . she died before we could marry.”
That explained a lot, but not everything. Regina wasn’t sure how to say anything of comfort. How did you comfort a fake dead lover about his fake dead almost-wife?
“I'm so sorry. So, there's no one?”
“No. Never.”
His short, purposeless words made Regina return to her original point.
“And even so, your life . . . it makes you happy?”
Robin looked at her and studied her face, as if deciding whether or not to trust her. She took the opportunity to memorize anew the planes of his face, knowing she didn’t have long with them before he was inevitably taken from her.
“That's not exactly what I said. That's what you said. If you want the truth, Your Majesty, I haven't been happy for a very long time.”
His words cast a shadow of sadness between them, and she ached to be able to reach out and touch him. But she couldn’t. He wouldn’t understand. And he wasn’t hers.
“You never had love,” she commented uselessly.
He laughed hollowly.
“I’ve had love more than any man should have. But I never got to keep it. And now I don’t deserve to.”
Regina stared at him, stunned into reverie, hearing the words she often used to describe herself coming from his mouth. It was the kind of moment that would be stamped inside her mind until she died. What it meant, she didn’t know, but she had the feeling many sleepless nights would be devoted to figuring it out.
Horses suddenly neighed in panic, and the sound of screams and swords clashing interrupted her thoughts.
“What was that?” he asked.
Regina listened and heard a familiar laugh on the wind. For once she loved hearing the sound.
“Oh, don't worry. I know who did that. He's on our side.”
Rumple soon appeared by their prison and magicked the gate open. Regina climbed out and remarked on his timing, asking for him to remove her magic cuff.
Of course, that’s when everything went wrong again and Regina found herself a new prisoner, captured by a Rumple who knew that it wasn’t really her who had caused this realm’s Belle to die, but was going to make her pay for it all the same.
---
Robin’s day had been getting worse by the moment, but now it was augmented by the fact that he was apparently not real. His entire trip to the dungeons of the Dark One was accompanied by conversation between the Evil Queen and said imp, implying lots of information that Robin found difficult to take in. On the one hand, it wasn’t as if it was outside the realm of possibility, but it stirred twinges of jealousy within Robin that he wasn’t aware still existed.
The Dark One excused himself to go and prepare torture devices or something equally ghastly and Robin decided to use the time to get a little clarification. While the Evil Queen, or Regina, as she kept insisting he call her, pounded on the door in vain, Robin helped himself to a seat on the admittedly uncomfortable cot. He had plans for it later.
“So,” Robin began, clearing his throat. “You're telling me I'm living in a fake world that's created by the wish of a princess who's not fake.”
“Well, it wasn't her wish exactly, but yes.”
“And in the real world, I'm some kind of folk hero, and the Evil Queen cared for me.” Robin put his hands behind his head, leaning against the wall. “Hmm, I'd say I did pretty well for myself.”
His nonchalance was putting her off guard, just as he intended. He’d get more information that way.
“Wait, that's it? You just believe me?”
“Do I believe that there's some other world where I'm living a completely different life, which, by the looks of things, is a hell of a lot better than this one? Yes, indeed. I don't mind believing that at all.” Her face was awash with remorse and something else that he couldn’t quite describe. There was something else about the other Robin she wasn’t telling him. “What? Am I a scoundrel over there, too?”
“No, you're not a scoundrel.” Her voice was gentle, fond, tender. He squirmed under it. She sat down beside him. “You're dead.”
That wasn’t news he got every day. Apparently, the real him was dead. So everything about himself, all the pain, misery, loss, and bloodshed didn’t mean a thing, not even to serve as a foil to a better version of himself.
Robin stood up with his back to her for a moment, before turning and attempting a casual tone.
“I see. And, uh, this other Robin, before he died, did he . . . did I have a good life?”
“I think so,” she said, standing, wiping a tear from her face. “I hope so. He helped a lot of people, which he was proud of. And he loved his friends and . . . family.”
Family, that was something he wondered about. Was it the same as the one he’d had here, the one he’d failed? She’d spoken of Marian, but then if the other him had been with Regina, that must have gone wrong somehow.
“And you,” he said softly, walking closer to her.
She stared at him and he wondered if she knew how much fearful longing she was displaying. For once, he had no desire to exploit it. There was something about her that made him long, too. Only he didn’t know for what.
“And me.”
But for all the longing pulsing between them, known and unknown, Robin didn’t have answers or resolution for either of them. All he had was the desire to help her. And himself, of course.
“Well, that sounds like it was a good life, even if it was too short.”
He moved past her before she could answer, giving her a chance to compose herself, and keeping him from doing something dangerous, like wiping her tears away himself. He dug into the cot, finding the tools he needed. Amazing really, how everything was useful if you gave it a chance.
“What are you doing?”
He focused his attention on the tumblers of the lock.
“Well, it's a little-known fact, but I'm not just the world's greatest thief.” The door clicked open and he gestured grandly for her. “Shall we, Your Majesty?”
She smiled and he found himself gratified to see it. For lack of anything better to do-not because it felt like she drew his gaze to wherever she was-he followed her as she led him through the castle, and out into the world that shouldn’t exist.
---
Regina cautiously led the way back to Pinocchio’s, not wanting to get into any more trouble, particularly when she still couldn’t use her magic.
“Regina, where did you go?” Emma as Regina slipped through the door. “Oh,” she said, as Robin entered behind Regina.
“I'm-I'm sorry I ran off, but we have to get out of here.” Regina held up her hand and Emma magicked the cuff off without even asking. Regina sighed in relief. “They're gonna be looking for us . . . sheriffs and knights and maybe Rumple, and-is that it?”
Regina pointed to the wooden structure gracing the back of the shop.
“This is it,” Pinocchio said proudly.
“That's how you're getting back?” Robin scoffed. “A tree?”
“A magic tree,” rejoined Pinocchio.
“Oh, well, forgive me,” Robin answered.
Emma looked at Regina apologetically, flicking her eyes to Robin.
“Regina, we do have to go.”
Regina nodded.
“Can you just give me a minute?” Regina walked back toward the door, Robin following, hoping for even a modicum of privacy. “Um, I'm so sorry I dragged you into this.”
Saying goodbye was harder than she thought. He wasn’t her Robin, but he was as close as she would ever get.
“I like an adventure,” he said. They stared at each other for a moment, and Regina couldn’t think of any words to say. She wanted to stay there forever, but that was not her fate. She was just about to turn and leave when he held out his hand. “Here. I want you to have this. So a piece of Robin is with you always.”
Regina held the feather reverently, awed at its existence. It was perfect, and she could only imagine it was an exact copy to the one Zelena had lost. It was the best gift he could have given her.
“Where did you get this?”
“It's my lucky feather. It's from a very lucky arrow.”
Regina was almost crying again and when he looked at her, nonplussed, with concern, she hastened to try to explain.
“When Robin . . . my Robin died, there was a feather that got lost on its way to me from him.”
“Funny coincidence,” he said. “I guess he wanted you to have a piece of himself, so this is just second best.”
She shook her head, realizing something important in the moment, but hardly knowing how to articulate it.
“No, because you see, he’s gone, completely gone. There’s nothing left. That’s the hardest part. But despite everything, I chose to believe and hope that he was in a good place. Maybe, I think, somehow . . . he lives on in you.
Something sad flashed across his face, something like shame.
“I don’t think the noble soul you described could live in such a vessel,” he said, gesturing to himself wryly.
“That’s not what I meant,” Regina said. She didn’t know how to respond. It certainly seemed like this Robin was a darkened version, but that alone was part of what made him so clearly different to everyone else in this world. “Perhaps a spark of him floated into this wish, that’s all I can hope for. It wasn’t meant to be anything against you.”
He gave her a half smile.
“It’s all right, Your Majesty. I take no offense.”
“Good,” she whispered, hungrily drinking him in.
Then she went back to Emma, who looked at her appraisingly.
“Regina, why don't you bring him?”
“He's not real. Emma, you said it yourself. This place was created by a wish. How could a wish become real?”
“Maybe it can,” Emma said, shrugging. “The feather. Robin's soul had to go somewhere. Maybe that's why he hasn't aged, why he's different. If you believe any part of him is in there, why walk away?”
Regina shook with her answer, the desire to grab him and never let go almost overwhelming. But the fear was overwhelming too, and the risk of having all hope turned to despair.
“Because, Emma, it's me. And I'm afraid of tempting fate.”
“No,” Emma said firmly. “We make our own fate. I did it, and now it's your turn.”
“Can the wardrobe even take three people?” Regina asked. “It could only do two before.”
“I made sure it was extra roomy,” Pinocchio said, winking.
There seemed to be no more excuses.
Regina stifled back her tears, afraid to even make the request. But then she turned back and Robin was standing right there.
“So . . . I'm in,” he said, his eyes trained on hers with an intensity she found hard to take.
“You are? It might not work.”
“Then again, it might,” he said, moving a step closer.
“You'd take the risk?”
She could hardly believe he was doing this for her and his initial answer confirmed it.
“Well, I don't know if you caught this, but, uh, things are looking pretty bleak for me here.” He stepped still closer. “And, you know, why not get to know the woman one version of me was willing to die for?”
Regina’s breath caught and she blinked at him, until Emma pulled on her arm, drawing her attention back where it should be.
Emma gave Pinocchio a goodbye hug and then stepped through the glowing portal made by the wardrobe.
The room began to shake and Regina looked around in confusion, until she realized that, since the subject of the wish was gone, this world was collapsing. They had to go now.
Regina smiled hesitantly at Robin.
“Shall we?” she said.
“After you, m’lady,” he said, bowing.
Regina held out her hand instead of moving forward. Robin stared at her, then slowly took her hand. She didn’t stop to examine how right it felt, she simply walked steadily toward the wardrobe.
Before they crossed the threshold, the door burst open and an impish cackle filled the air.
“Not so fast, dearie. We had an appointment.”
Regina felt arms fold around her, gripping tightly, while Robin’s hand was held fast in hers. She tripped under the force of the momentum and fell forward into the wardrobe, pulling Rumple and Robin with her. A swirling haze wrapped around her and she felt the arms fall away, melted and dissolved, it seemed. She couldn’t tell if Robin’s hand was still in hers.
And then she was standing in a dark forest, alone.
Emma’s voice called out for her and Regina looked up as Emma ran toward her.
“Regina? Are you okay? Where's Robin?”
Regina’s heart sank low and she couldn’t help but hate her fate. It hadn’t worked.
“I don't know. We fell in together. Rumple crashed the party, and he came too. I guess wishes can’t become reality.”
“I'm so sorry.”
“Can I-can I have a moment alone, please?”
Emma nodded, touching her hand to Regina’s, and said to join her when Regina was ready.
Regina walked aways from the tree that had potentially been her route back to knowing the man she loved, or at least a part of him. She stared out at the lights of the town she had created and was in charge of protecting.
She had to come to grips with the fact that no matter what she hoped, her destiny was fighting the darkness. Her destiny was fighting for the people she loved. Her destiny was learning to love herself despite her past.
And then there was the slightest whisper of a sound behind her and Regina turned.
He stood there, alive, solid, real. If she had been able to move, she might have rushed to greet him. As it was, all she could do was stare in disbelief. Then she looked wildly around for Rumple, but there was no imp to be found. He hadn’t come through, but Robin had. That had to mean something.
“Sorry, I’m late,” he said, walking casually toward her. “So, where exactly are we?”
A new beginning walked toward her dressed in the likeness of old love. Regina took a deep breath.
“Robin of Locksley, as Mayor, I'd like to officially welcome you to Storybrooke.”