I am so so so tired.
I'm tired. I don't think I have ever been so physically and emotionally exhausted. Not that it's necessarily a bad thing, and I'm not complaining for the most part. I like all the stuff I'm doing, and I feel like I do a lot more than I have ever done at this school. But the money issues are sort of draining me.
I love my internship. At first I was scared that I'd be totally incompetent or something...but I even answered the phone today and didn't worry about it (If you know me real well you know I'm bad at the phone...i always worry i won't know the answer - even when I obviously will, like when I worked at J. Crew). But getting up at like 6:30 on tuesday and friday, getting home at 5:30, and then doing homework till I crash at like 10 really takes a chunk out of my social life. Then the other three school days, i feel like i can never fit enough stuff in. and i spend the whole weekend trying to figure out my life, and future stuff, and money issues. And this past saturday I spent like 7 hours doing SSB posters and flyering, only to see monday morning that the poster in Usdan was gone and half my flyers had blown away or come un-stuck. Not an encouraging experience.
The main reason why this stresses me out is because almost all of my friends, and Quinn, are all graduating this year, and i'm scared that I won't ever see them again. Kara's leaving for Seattle with Alia, Quinn has no idea where he'll be next year, AJ is always threatening to transfer, and if Evan's on tour with Meghanstorm or something, when will i see him?? (winkwink). I'm going to miss these kids tremendously, and i feel like i never see them. which i don't. much. We had a party a couple weeks ago and that was wonderful. I had the best time, my friends were gathered in my home, and everything felt good. But those moments are few and far between.
I'm having serious money issues lately, which really gets me down. I worry a lot. Because out of the $50 a week I have to live on, I have to spend $18 on commuting to the internship. With gas and food...that leaves me like $7 for "entertainment" purposes. That's like a cheap bottle of wine and a pack of gum. Sweet.
Quinn and I are going down to William Paterson this Friday to celebrate Dan's birthday. I'm going to try not to spend any money until then so I can maybe afford the gas to get there and back and a couple drinks. But we're going to this hipster bar and um...I have no hipster clothes. The stories of indie chicks wearing muumuus and cowboy boots and feather earrings sort of intimidated me since i own...0 of those items. But I suppose I'll throw something together last-minute like. I dunno. I know it'll be fun but like OMG what do i wear lol? (juuuuuust kidding).
I don't mean to sound whiny. Let me summarize in a way which demonstrates the good points. I am ecstatic with my internship, i <3 my friends, I'm learning (or trying to learn) how to be an adult and manage my own money, and I'm living with my boyfriend who makes me happier than pretty much anything and anyone else in the world (stop making those patronizing "aww" sounds!). I just feel like I really am ready for February break. A lot. for true.
Okay, sorry, I'm done. love love love.
I love my internship. At first I was scared that I'd be totally incompetent or something...but I even answered the phone today and didn't worry about it (If you know me real well you know I'm bad at the phone...i always worry i won't know the answer - even when I obviously will, like when I worked at J. Crew). But getting up at like 6:30 on tuesday and friday, getting home at 5:30, and then doing homework till I crash at like 10 really takes a chunk out of my social life. Then the other three school days, i feel like i can never fit enough stuff in. and i spend the whole weekend trying to figure out my life, and future stuff, and money issues. And this past saturday I spent like 7 hours doing SSB posters and flyering, only to see monday morning that the poster in Usdan was gone and half my flyers had blown away or come un-stuck. Not an encouraging experience.
The main reason why this stresses me out is because almost all of my friends, and Quinn, are all graduating this year, and i'm scared that I won't ever see them again. Kara's leaving for Seattle with Alia, Quinn has no idea where he'll be next year, AJ is always threatening to transfer, and if Evan's on tour with Meghanstorm or something, when will i see him?? (winkwink). I'm going to miss these kids tremendously, and i feel like i never see them. which i don't. much. We had a party a couple weeks ago and that was wonderful. I had the best time, my friends were gathered in my home, and everything felt good. But those moments are few and far between.
I'm having serious money issues lately, which really gets me down. I worry a lot. Because out of the $50 a week I have to live on, I have to spend $18 on commuting to the internship. With gas and food...that leaves me like $7 for "entertainment" purposes. That's like a cheap bottle of wine and a pack of gum. Sweet.
Quinn and I are going down to William Paterson this Friday to celebrate Dan's birthday. I'm going to try not to spend any money until then so I can maybe afford the gas to get there and back and a couple drinks. But we're going to this hipster bar and um...I have no hipster clothes. The stories of indie chicks wearing muumuus and cowboy boots and feather earrings sort of intimidated me since i own...0 of those items. But I suppose I'll throw something together last-minute like. I dunno. I know it'll be fun but like OMG what do i wear lol? (juuuuuust kidding).
I don't mean to sound whiny. Let me summarize in a way which demonstrates the good points. I am ecstatic with my internship, i <3 my friends, I'm learning (or trying to learn) how to be an adult and manage my own money, and I'm living with my boyfriend who makes me happier than pretty much anything and anyone else in the world (stop making those patronizing "aww" sounds!). I just feel like I really am ready for February break. A lot. for true.
Okay, sorry, I'm done. love love love.