ah
This entry is about family. First, I will begin with my mother.
Mom. She and I used to be so close, and now I don't even care anymore. Maybe I'm not supposed to see flaws in her because she's my mother, but there are just so many I can't ignore them anymore. She can be so fake. I inherited that from her. I hate when we'll be fighting, someone will show up at the house and she pretends like everything is fine. You know what, everything is not fine and dont even pretend like it is. And she talks behind backs like no ones business. I can be a room away and she'll already start saying shit about me. She's not even good at it. Or spreading information about me. You know, if I want people to know, I'd tell them. I dont need a fucking messenger.
Dad. Well he's never been there so it's not a big deal I guess that he's still not. But it stings when I see him with Alyssa. Too bad in 16 months the time & money he's invested in her is the same amount he's invested in his own kid in almost 18 years.
Collectively as parents, I know they dont give a shit anymore. Yeah, I have a good head on my shoulders, and yeah, I know how to fend & think for myself, but knowing I can come home and have some support would also be nice sometimes. And I hate how inconsiderate they can be. The only day I have to sleep in results in my dad waking me up at 7 and my mom coming in to tell me all the things I need to do for her today. Oh fan-fucking-tastic.
Stacey. Wow, has she changed. We've never been close, but at least we could be civil to each other. Now because we were never close, I must not give a shit. This is part of what my mother was discussing as I was a room away. She has no personality. Really, she doesnt. How am I supposed to get along with someone who cares about nothing but herself?
Chris is basically my savior. He is one of the very few things I can stand around here. I love him more than I ever thought I could being his sister. He understands where I'm coming from and we both cant wait to get out of this place. Thank God for him.
And I really hate being to busy to be with anybody, because right now I could use somebody holding me close and telling me how much they care
Mom. She and I used to be so close, and now I don't even care anymore. Maybe I'm not supposed to see flaws in her because she's my mother, but there are just so many I can't ignore them anymore. She can be so fake. I inherited that from her. I hate when we'll be fighting, someone will show up at the house and she pretends like everything is fine. You know what, everything is not fine and dont even pretend like it is. And she talks behind backs like no ones business. I can be a room away and she'll already start saying shit about me. She's not even good at it. Or spreading information about me. You know, if I want people to know, I'd tell them. I dont need a fucking messenger.
Dad. Well he's never been there so it's not a big deal I guess that he's still not. But it stings when I see him with Alyssa. Too bad in 16 months the time & money he's invested in her is the same amount he's invested in his own kid in almost 18 years.
Collectively as parents, I know they dont give a shit anymore. Yeah, I have a good head on my shoulders, and yeah, I know how to fend & think for myself, but knowing I can come home and have some support would also be nice sometimes. And I hate how inconsiderate they can be. The only day I have to sleep in results in my dad waking me up at 7 and my mom coming in to tell me all the things I need to do for her today. Oh fan-fucking-tastic.
Stacey. Wow, has she changed. We've never been close, but at least we could be civil to each other. Now because we were never close, I must not give a shit. This is part of what my mother was discussing as I was a room away. She has no personality. Really, she doesnt. How am I supposed to get along with someone who cares about nothing but herself?
Chris is basically my savior. He is one of the very few things I can stand around here. I love him more than I ever thought I could being his sister. He understands where I'm coming from and we both cant wait to get out of this place. Thank God for him.
And I really hate being to busy to be with anybody, because right now I could use somebody holding me close and telling me how much they care