Just Letting Ya'll know...
Things are changing, yet again.
No longer engaged or with Robert, I have to face the very likely possibility that I will be moving back to Fresno by the end of June. Some folks are helping me out with trying to find job/ lodging in the North CA area, but things are not looking terribly bright. The whole situation just pisses me right off, but what can you do when your partner finally realizes that OH, you ARENT what he wanted. Then says "sorry I wasn't listening the first hundred times you tried to warn me"!
MMMMM Bitterness.
My neighbor Ling told me about some low income housing places, and Patrick and I are looking into it. If we can get something together before the lease is up in June, then HURRAY! But the waiting lists seem pretty daunting, and I almost wish robert would have broken up with me sooner so we could have longer to look!
But even if it doesnt work out here, seems that things have come together remarkably well in Fresno: my own, real room this time, a car in a few months, a laptop that functions properly. Sydney hinted at it, but I have kinda felt that this was a sign: I have been in this situation for too long and the universe was giving me a leg up this time around.
I am back to having extremely good or bad days, lots of crying and packing. My friends here are doing everything they can to keep my spirits up, and I am really grateful for it. I am still in a better headspace than I would imagine myself to be though. I still cry when I think it, but I really believe it to be true: this was something I needed for recovery, and now that time is done. I need to stand on my own two damn feet. Fresno will give me the desire to work to get out of there, and to get even better. TRUST ME, I know. ^^
No longer engaged or with Robert, I have to face the very likely possibility that I will be moving back to Fresno by the end of June. Some folks are helping me out with trying to find job/ lodging in the North CA area, but things are not looking terribly bright. The whole situation just pisses me right off, but what can you do when your partner finally realizes that OH, you ARENT what he wanted. Then says "sorry I wasn't listening the first hundred times you tried to warn me"!
MMMMM Bitterness.
My neighbor Ling told me about some low income housing places, and Patrick and I are looking into it. If we can get something together before the lease is up in June, then HURRAY! But the waiting lists seem pretty daunting, and I almost wish robert would have broken up with me sooner so we could have longer to look!
But even if it doesnt work out here, seems that things have come together remarkably well in Fresno: my own, real room this time, a car in a few months, a laptop that functions properly. Sydney hinted at it, but I have kinda felt that this was a sign: I have been in this situation for too long and the universe was giving me a leg up this time around.
I am back to having extremely good or bad days, lots of crying and packing. My friends here are doing everything they can to keep my spirits up, and I am really grateful for it. I am still in a better headspace than I would imagine myself to be though. I still cry when I think it, but I really believe it to be true: this was something I needed for recovery, and now that time is done. I need to stand on my own two damn feet. Fresno will give me the desire to work to get out of there, and to get even better. TRUST ME, I know. ^^