well, sadness
i had to give Darla back to dad today. i didnt want to, and i dont think she wanted me to either :( i cried the whole way to his house pretty much. she jumped in my lap and licked my tears away! dad said that he didnt think she remembered him. i hung around for about an hour so as to make her more comfortable.
i'm actually excited that dad is back, which is weird because i never thought that i would be. i mean, his third time in rehab...history speaks for itself...but maybe - just maybe - this time will be different. he's talking about making lots of changes, like moving & selling his store. i think he's moving out of alabama. i know that i always complain and i know that i hardly ever saw him, but it still makes me sad to think that my daddy wont just be 30 minutes away if i need him. and i admit, there are times that i do! like the other day, i was in my bathroom looking up at the dirty fan on the ceiling and the first thing i thought was 'daddy would know how to fix this'. and then i started thinking how fun it would be to have him over to work on little things like that with me so that i could learn from him. i have tons of days like that planned out in my head, knowing that they will probably never happen.
my life in my head is so great. i have all these best friends and we always go do things...like shop or work out and we're always laughing. thats the best part...all the laughter and smiles.
i know, i know...i'm crazy. whatever.
i'm actually excited that dad is back, which is weird because i never thought that i would be. i mean, his third time in rehab...history speaks for itself...but maybe - just maybe - this time will be different. he's talking about making lots of changes, like moving & selling his store. i think he's moving out of alabama. i know that i always complain and i know that i hardly ever saw him, but it still makes me sad to think that my daddy wont just be 30 minutes away if i need him. and i admit, there are times that i do! like the other day, i was in my bathroom looking up at the dirty fan on the ceiling and the first thing i thought was 'daddy would know how to fix this'. and then i started thinking how fun it would be to have him over to work on little things like that with me so that i could learn from him. i have tons of days like that planned out in my head, knowing that they will probably never happen.
my life in my head is so great. i have all these best friends and we always go do things...like shop or work out and we're always laughing. thats the best part...all the laughter and smiles.
i know, i know...i'm crazy. whatever.