(no subject)
well, this week went by fast.
im unsatisfied.
uncomfortable.
i'm tired of being numb.
i have so much on my mind.
thank God (literally) for my dad.
he is the only person i can completely rant to nonstop without feeling pitiful. i can always express exactly how i feel to him and he knows exactly how to respond.
im so so so blessed.
ahhh challenge, was a challenge.
sooo many things to go on about such as:
-small group girls and their cliques
-learning how to lead when i feel so wrong for the job
-changed lives
-new friendships
-new outlooks
gosh.
im sick of what i know as of christianity.
im sick of people saying and saying and talking and talking but never DOING.
my heart has gotten sooo hard and i had no idea.
i knew, but i couldnt pinpoint what it was till now:
im TOO comfortable in myself to the point i act like i dont need a savior.
-my own apartment
-a good job with friends i work with
-plenty of money, enough so tha ti can go out to eat for every meal
-friends
-clothes
-ipods and internet
-a boyfriend who makes me feel wanted and who cares for me and i care for him
do i even have room for jesus?
aparently i just have been tagging him on the side as my "title"
im ready to do.
im ready to give things up.
im ready to not only say love but show love.
i want to be and ONLY be a vessel.
ughh i need to learn what real sacrifice is and...im too comfortable and numb to the divine blessings and grace God showers on me every single moment of my life.
im unsatisfied.
uncomfortable.
i'm tired of being numb.
i have so much on my mind.
thank God (literally) for my dad.
he is the only person i can completely rant to nonstop without feeling pitiful. i can always express exactly how i feel to him and he knows exactly how to respond.
im so so so blessed.
ahhh challenge, was a challenge.
sooo many things to go on about such as:
-small group girls and their cliques
-learning how to lead when i feel so wrong for the job
-changed lives
-new friendships
-new outlooks
gosh.
im sick of what i know as of christianity.
im sick of people saying and saying and talking and talking but never DOING.
my heart has gotten sooo hard and i had no idea.
i knew, but i couldnt pinpoint what it was till now:
im TOO comfortable in myself to the point i act like i dont need a savior.
-my own apartment
-a good job with friends i work with
-plenty of money, enough so tha ti can go out to eat for every meal
-friends
-clothes
-ipods and internet
-a boyfriend who makes me feel wanted and who cares for me and i care for him
do i even have room for jesus?
aparently i just have been tagging him on the side as my "title"
im ready to do.
im ready to give things up.
im ready to not only say love but show love.
i want to be and ONLY be a vessel.
ughh i need to learn what real sacrifice is and...im too comfortable and numb to the divine blessings and grace God showers on me every single moment of my life.