(no subject)
what the fuck am i living in? i'm totally speechless now. i haven't had one of these times yet. i thought i would sooner. the times when you get so upset you just want to leave your house and don't care if you aren't suppoed to? everyone has that palce that they leave to go to. and without questioning my thoughts i got ready to walk to tracey's. forgetting that she's out of town. i guess that's what happens when you're completely blindsighted. i miss her. she is the only one that can look at me and make everything better. she can hug me and take me in and just everything disappears for a while. i want her to come home. i want to lay in her bed in the awful room that i don't like anymore and cry with her. and i want to hug mama nan and crack jokes about her adn her drugs. and then i want to play eucher with cotton even though i suck. i just miss my second home.
looks like i might be moving out and someplace else. my mom is leaving carl. or is she? they get in fights all the time and she always threatens to leave, but she never does. this time i think she might. i guess they got in a big fight at work in front of everyone. i don't even want to talk about what happened. i can't talk about this anymore.
oh gee, look who just texted me. after making me wait 4 hours? no fuck you. find some other girl to play with tonight.
i just want tomorrow afternoon to come. i miss my best friend so much. she is the only one that can make me smile right now. i love you number six<3