"For so long I thought I was asylum bound...but just seeing you makes me think twice"
Well... im finally 16! hehe... wednesday was my birthday for those of you losers who either forgot or just didnt know... im gonna have a party on may 7th from 6pm to midnight... so if anyone can make it then contact me in any way that you know possible... hehe. i will be giving out invitations... but if you dont get one then talk to me and i will give you details (if i want you there) coz last year... some ppl got mad at me coz i didnt give them invitations and they really wanted to come... but i thought they knew they would be coming... anywayz... i dont want that to happen this year... one more thing.. there will most likely be some alcohol present at the party... my mom doesnt care but if your gonna drink just dont let it get tooo outta hand *winks* there will be music, dancing, we might go swimming and theres a jacuzzi, so bring your swim suits just in case. if anyone wants to listen to anything other than punk or alternative then feel free to bring cds because thats pretty much all i have. anywayz... i think thats all i have to say about my party... well... theres a lot that happened since my last entry... me and kyle got back together and then broke up again shortly after lol. he lied to me again... and thats just something i really hate... i cant stand it when ppl lie straight to my face. that is probably one of the worst things that someone can do to me. everytime id mention that kerri girl he cheated on me with.. hed be like "oh i never see her, i havent talked to her in forever" or something along those lines... but turns out hes been inviting her over every single day after school... which i would normally have absolutely no problem with... because i dont care if they are friends... but the fact that he lied to me about it is just too shady for me... and the fact that he did cheat on me with her doesnt help the situation too much either. now hes all like... "i thought you'd get mad at me if you knew that i still talked to her"... kyle knows im not the jealous type... i honestly dont care if they are friends... coz there friendship doesnt concern me... the fact that he decided to lie about his friendship with her to me does concern me... coz that means we dont have trust. if he feels that he has to lie to me about something then its obvious hes hiding something... even if nothing happened between the 2 of them... its still wrong to lie to me... especially when i was starting to trust him again... i really felt that we could work things out... and maybe we still can but i dunno if i wanna go thru this crapoli anymore... i mean... now it seems like theres always gonna be something... and maybe its my fault... maybe i just read too into these things... maybe he really meant nothing by keeping the fact that him and kerri are friends from me... maybe im too sensative to this sorta thing... but i know i wouldnt have taken this crap from anyone a year ago... and i dont think i should now... because what am i gonna get out of it?... a guy 4 hours away that lies to me and who ill barely get to see... i dont think its worth it... i dunno... its all very confusing lol. and that kid on the bus.. *shakes head* i really dont know what to make of him... i mean at this point im pretty sure he likes me coz he was talkin on the phone with his friend and hes like..."yea im sittin next to that hot girl on the bus i was telling you about.... yea... jessica..." and then he gave me a lil smile and he always warms my hands when there cold.. and just lil things like that... i dunno... i doubt i will ever date him... im not even that sure if i want to... theres just something about him thats really weird and i cant quite put my finger on it... but hes really odd. lol. he got his braces off on tuesday and i havent been able to see what he looks like yet... i shall see him on monday hopefully. *shrugs* guys are soooo ughhhhhhhh confusing... but at the same time... i dunno what i would do without them... hehe. well... its friday... *cheers up* fridays are good. today was a pretty good day... my friend laura got me balloons... hehe... and this one guy (he was kinda cute too) sang me happy birthday in the hall... i have no idea who he was but he was singing in this weird voice and then he asked me what my name is and how old i am...lol. it was cute. hehe... kinda made my afternoon. lol. im such a loser... too easily amused.... *shakes head at self* well... wednesday (my bday) was fun... i hung out with the guys (whats left of them, anyway lol.) and my mom... and i get to go parasailing someday (we get to pick the day... and im not sure of which day to pick yet...hehe)ive never been but it seems fun. well... thats all i can think of writing about atm... so... comment if you like... peace out!