(no subject)
it is funny how in life there are periods of transition blended so carefully within periods of zero change. i've been in minnesota for just over two weeks now and have already managed to take giant steps into my future.
i had to close the door on a love i thought i was already over. there was that moment where i had to decide if i wanted to walk through and throw caution to the wind or slam it shut. i slammed it shut. was that the right decision? i think so. i hope so.
i had myself so convinced that i didn't love him anymore. so utterly convinced that what we had didn't matter and wasn't real. turns out i was wrong on all accounts. but the reality is that even though what we have/had is real and does matter, it isn't enough.
love complicates everything. but in a way, i'm glad it endures. i'm glad because now i know i have the capacity to forgive even the biggest hurt and that i can love through that pain.
today is a perfect day in minneapolis. the sun is warming me through the eastern windows of my office and i know i'm in the exact place i should be... and i can accept that just because i haven't gotten exactly what i wanted, i have gotten exactly what i need. i'm safe, happy, and warm.
i had to close the door on a love i thought i was already over. there was that moment where i had to decide if i wanted to walk through and throw caution to the wind or slam it shut. i slammed it shut. was that the right decision? i think so. i hope so.
i had myself so convinced that i didn't love him anymore. so utterly convinced that what we had didn't matter and wasn't real. turns out i was wrong on all accounts. but the reality is that even though what we have/had is real and does matter, it isn't enough.
love complicates everything. but in a way, i'm glad it endures. i'm glad because now i know i have the capacity to forgive even the biggest hurt and that i can love through that pain.
today is a perfect day in minneapolis. the sun is warming me through the eastern windows of my office and i know i'm in the exact place i should be... and i can accept that just because i haven't gotten exactly what i wanted, i have gotten exactly what i need. i'm safe, happy, and warm.