death...
death wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for love...but love makes it hurt so deeply. what do you say to someone when you know that they won't make it throughout the week? ...even though they are fighting so hard for their life, and they're not fighting for themself...they're fighting for you? how do you say goodbye to someone that you adore? i should be so thankful that i'm being given the chance to say my goodbye's and my i loves you's to my papaw...but it is so hard, he's such a stubborn old man...he will never give up...he just wants to go fishing :*( oh how i wish i could take him fishing...he used to always take me when i was little, and he would get so mad when i'd catch more fish than him...lol, memories are so wonderful. i miss him already. i hope that he'll recognize me when we meet in heaven.
god, being here by myself is killing me! i've been going through pictures, crying like a baby...i just want to lay my head in someones lap, and just cry...and just have them hold me, i don't want anyone to to tell me that it's god's plan...or that he's going to a better place...or that he won't be in pain anymore, i know all of that...i just want to be selfish for a little bit, i just want someone to shut up and let me vent, let me cry, let me talk about the good times...let me hurt.
god, being here by myself is killing me! i've been going through pictures, crying like a baby...i just want to lay my head in someones lap, and just cry...and just have them hold me, i don't want anyone to to tell me that it's god's plan...or that he's going to a better place...or that he won't be in pain anymore, i know all of that...i just want to be selfish for a little bit, i just want someone to shut up and let me vent, let me cry, let me talk about the good times...let me hurt.