(no subject)
Now I know why everyone says that being friends with an ex is almost impossible. Before Chris & I got together, we were really good friends & we shared a strong connection. We went through a lot together, both as friends and as a couple. And even now, after we've broken up, we've stayed close & now he is one of best friends. I didn't realize though until recently just how much I'm taken for granted. Even as a couple, I was never first in his life. Now I don't mean that I should be before God, before church, before his job, or before his family, but with little things, I feel like I deserve to feel at least SOMEWHAT important.
Give me an example, you ask? Prom. Even after Prom he said he was going to take me. I specifically wanted him to be my prom date, not because I necesarily still have feelings for him, but because boyfriend or not, he is still my best guy friend & I didn't want to go with anyone else. As a lot of you know, Prom is less than 3 weeks away. Things were looking really good. Some of my senior friends from church & I were talking about prom, when Chris suddenly asked me when mine was. When I told him the date, he said that he couldn't go anymore. In my head I thought, "oh, it must be because he has work." And I was fine with that. But when I asked him why, he said, "Oh, it's because I'm going to be hanging out with my buddy that night." What the hell, right? For FIVE hours he can't NOT hang out with his buddy and spend it with me on a night that is VERY special to me? He didn't even want to try to talk to his friend about it, to see if he could work something out. He just left me hanging.
So now, I'm very disappointed and angry at him. I'm over the prom thing, but I'm not over the fact that for once, I can't come first in his life. I don't even feel like I'm even important to him. So screw him. I can't believe he would do this. But in a way, I am SO glad he did this because it's finally made me ask myself WHY I ever liked him in the first place. I'm am finally OVER him.
Give me an example, you ask? Prom. Even after Prom he said he was going to take me. I specifically wanted him to be my prom date, not because I necesarily still have feelings for him, but because boyfriend or not, he is still my best guy friend & I didn't want to go with anyone else. As a lot of you know, Prom is less than 3 weeks away. Things were looking really good. Some of my senior friends from church & I were talking about prom, when Chris suddenly asked me when mine was. When I told him the date, he said that he couldn't go anymore. In my head I thought, "oh, it must be because he has work." And I was fine with that. But when I asked him why, he said, "Oh, it's because I'm going to be hanging out with my buddy that night." What the hell, right? For FIVE hours he can't NOT hang out with his buddy and spend it with me on a night that is VERY special to me? He didn't even want to try to talk to his friend about it, to see if he could work something out. He just left me hanging.
So now, I'm very disappointed and angry at him. I'm over the prom thing, but I'm not over the fact that for once, I can't come first in his life. I don't even feel like I'm even important to him. So screw him. I can't believe he would do this. But in a way, I am SO glad he did this because it's finally made me ask myself WHY I ever liked him in the first place. I'm am finally OVER him.