*June 5th, 2002*
Exactly one year ago today I recall walking into school right after first period. I remember my aggravation with the people at the front desk as they requested my ID, making me put everything down on the floor and dig the damn thing out. And I specifically remember everyone asking me why the hell my arm was bandaged. Let's recap, shall we? Jess is an idiot, and for those of you wondering how that big ugly scar found its way on my left arm here goes:
*5:30 a.m. my alarm went off. As usual I wasn't ready to drag myself out of bed so i hit the snooze & turned on the straightener thinking that by the time my snooze button went off i'd be set to straighten the hair. Nine minutes later the snooze goes off- and try to envision this next part in your heads in order to increase level of humor- i reached over to shut the alarm off with my right hand, somehow hitting the wire of my straightener, causing it to jump onto my left arm and clamp itself there. I sat there staring at it for a few seconds wondering how the fuck to get it off. I decided to just hold up my left arm and pray to God that it would fall off~ luckily it did. I sat in bed and looked at my arm- it didn't hurt and there were no marks. I showed it to my mum who was still in bed and muttered about how I've burned myself before and not to worry. So I bandaged it meself and got ready for school. That son of a bitch started to hurt though, and my dad took one look at it and informed me of the second degree burns then took me to the ER, where I sat for an hour and a half- the only patient in there (with the exception of the homeless man who walked in to use the bathroom, shave, and leave)- waiting for them to call me in as my arm bubbled and burned. Eventually it was taken care of: the doc told me i was the only patient she'd ever had who had burned herself with a straightener. hey, someone had to do it.
*Now, a year later, this beautiful scar still symbolizes why I am the epitome of clumziness, stupidity, and failure. Every now & then people still ask about the burn. My most prized memoir from freshmen year, this baby brings back good times and reminds me of last summer.
*Lesson to be learned from this story: don't fuckin turn on an iron straightener at 5:30 in the morning
*5:30 a.m. my alarm went off. As usual I wasn't ready to drag myself out of bed so i hit the snooze & turned on the straightener thinking that by the time my snooze button went off i'd be set to straighten the hair. Nine minutes later the snooze goes off- and try to envision this next part in your heads in order to increase level of humor- i reached over to shut the alarm off with my right hand, somehow hitting the wire of my straightener, causing it to jump onto my left arm and clamp itself there. I sat there staring at it for a few seconds wondering how the fuck to get it off. I decided to just hold up my left arm and pray to God that it would fall off~ luckily it did. I sat in bed and looked at my arm- it didn't hurt and there were no marks. I showed it to my mum who was still in bed and muttered about how I've burned myself before and not to worry. So I bandaged it meself and got ready for school. That son of a bitch started to hurt though, and my dad took one look at it and informed me of the second degree burns then took me to the ER, where I sat for an hour and a half- the only patient in there (with the exception of the homeless man who walked in to use the bathroom, shave, and leave)- waiting for them to call me in as my arm bubbled and burned. Eventually it was taken care of: the doc told me i was the only patient she'd ever had who had burned herself with a straightener. hey, someone had to do it.
*Now, a year later, this beautiful scar still symbolizes why I am the epitome of clumziness, stupidity, and failure. Every now & then people still ask about the burn. My most prized memoir from freshmen year, this baby brings back good times and reminds me of last summer.
*Lesson to be learned from this story: don't fuckin turn on an iron straightener at 5:30 in the morning