(no subject)

[jeshiee]

this is my 2nd entry in 1 night, but i need to talk.

i feel like i am always, constantly in trouble lately.
for little, tiny things.
it's like i try really hard, and sure- i mess up,
but i guess i'd just like a break.
even just for one day.

another thing,
lately when my mom has gotten mad and given me talks-
it isn't her being crazy, it's just her overreacting
but having justifiable points.

i guess i am just struggling with being a smart alec
teenager with a bad attitude. i want to take the
lessons she's offering me to heart, but i wish
she'd deliver them in a calmer, more loving way
rather than yelling.

can someone give me some pointers on how to deal with this?

i'm tender and sensitive & i can't take it.

God,
open up my eyes to your ways.
i know them, but i've lost sight.
you are the only one who can restore me.
not my parents, not my friends, not even
sunday school- only you. thank you for
loving me even when i'm an idiot.
you rule. i love you. please forgive me
for being so dumb. open my eyes.