I just learned a sweet new dance
Someone tell me what the hell is the deal with these damn capri pants? I have never understood why chicks like to wear these fucking things so goddamned much! I have always been against capri pants, from the very beginning of this sickening national nightmare, back in the late 90s when I was in high school. My girlfriend got a pair of capri pants and I pretty much told her they made her look like shit. Because they do - capri pants will make any woman look at least 10% less attractive than if she were wearing regular long pants, or shorts, or a skirt, etc. Every chick I have ever seen looks totally fat in capri pants, and I just can't bear to see these otherwise lovely ladies degrade themselves in this fashion. People say that tank tops, bikinis, low-cuts and the like are degrading, and in many cases they tend to be, but none of these are as unforgivably brash as capri pants. I mean, seriously: God gave you a certain kind of body - maybe it's nice, maybe not so nice - but for you to willfully and brazenly flout your lack of gratitude for being a human being by making your gift of a body less attractive...
The idea simply sickens me. Which is why I don't know why Stephanie got all bent out of shape for me making fun of her capri pants to Don at work today.
Chapter two
When I'm not "just trying to do the right thing," I am often reading. Lately I have begun to read a lot more than I have for the last couple of years. It has begun to get embarrassing to be less well-read than my little brother, who is, for all intents and purposes, a total scrote. By the way, Richard, if you are reading (everyone, Richard; Richard, everyone), I apologize for nothing. Also, it was great hanging out and getting loose with you this past weekend, and I look forward to next weekend as well. After that, we'll have to discuss a roadtrip up to Blowhio. Anyway, I have been reading more lately, which is noticeably improving my ability to concentrate. Not at work, of course, but in conversation, around the house, driving, etc. This is because in order to read I have to make time for it. Since there is no light in my room (or rather, since I am too lazy to take five minutes to replace the light bulb in my room), I must read while the house is typically an entropic nightmare of activity: the kids screaming at each other and fighting, Mike occasionally coming out into the common areas of the house in order to snort, clear his throat, growl, and - on certain days - begin insanely screaming into my younger siblings' faces, as I vainly attempt to relax all parties involved by intoning pleasant, melodious tones and discussing what may be coming on tv at the moment. For this reason, I have been able to revive my long-lost ability to tune things out, an ability that I was always known for as a youth, but which had failed me in recent months. It's really just too bad that I was able to successfully tune out every college professor I ever met without any difficulty whatever.
In any case, I have very much enjoyed this reading, and have, in the past few days, read both The Collected Tales of Nikolai Gogol (my favorite Russian author) and In Cold Blood, a 'nonfiction novel,' which recounts the gruesome 1959 murder of the Clutter family in Western Kansas, and the murder's aftermath. There was, of course, a movie recently made from this book, starring Phillip Seymour Hoffman as author Truman Capote. Today I am beginning to read Fathers and Sons by Ivan Turgenev, and I very much look forward to the experience.
I just realized that none of this is interesting. I am getting totally lame. Someone please help me.
The idea simply sickens me. Which is why I don't know why Stephanie got all bent out of shape for me making fun of her capri pants to Don at work today.
Chapter two
When I'm not "just trying to do the right thing," I am often reading. Lately I have begun to read a lot more than I have for the last couple of years. It has begun to get embarrassing to be less well-read than my little brother, who is, for all intents and purposes, a total scrote. By the way, Richard, if you are reading (everyone, Richard; Richard, everyone), I apologize for nothing. Also, it was great hanging out and getting loose with you this past weekend, and I look forward to next weekend as well. After that, we'll have to discuss a roadtrip up to Blowhio. Anyway, I have been reading more lately, which is noticeably improving my ability to concentrate. Not at work, of course, but in conversation, around the house, driving, etc. This is because in order to read I have to make time for it. Since there is no light in my room (or rather, since I am too lazy to take five minutes to replace the light bulb in my room), I must read while the house is typically an entropic nightmare of activity: the kids screaming at each other and fighting, Mike occasionally coming out into the common areas of the house in order to snort, clear his throat, growl, and - on certain days - begin insanely screaming into my younger siblings' faces, as I vainly attempt to relax all parties involved by intoning pleasant, melodious tones and discussing what may be coming on tv at the moment. For this reason, I have been able to revive my long-lost ability to tune things out, an ability that I was always known for as a youth, but which had failed me in recent months. It's really just too bad that I was able to successfully tune out every college professor I ever met without any difficulty whatever.
In any case, I have very much enjoyed this reading, and have, in the past few days, read both The Collected Tales of Nikolai Gogol (my favorite Russian author) and In Cold Blood, a 'nonfiction novel,' which recounts the gruesome 1959 murder of the Clutter family in Western Kansas, and the murder's aftermath. There was, of course, a movie recently made from this book, starring Phillip Seymour Hoffman as author Truman Capote. Today I am beginning to read Fathers and Sons by Ivan Turgenev, and I very much look forward to the experience.
I just realized that none of this is interesting. I am getting totally lame. Someone please help me.