it took me almost a year but

[jerneja]

it seems i'm finally finally over jure. His cousin's boyfriend added me on FB (am so glad about it - i'd always wanted to email them and then didn't because i thought it would be weird) and among his pics is one of jure and branka. I looked at it - i made myself do it, and nothing. Didn't feel a thing. It was sort of like an out-of-body experience; seeing my first serious boyfriend, my first lover, the man i thought was going to be my husband, with someone else. She's not particularly pretty - but he looks more man next to her than he ever did next to me, and i suppose that counts for something. He's wearing a really ugly puma shirt (horrible, his style is so off it actually hurts) - but if they're happy, then good for them. I'm happy too, most of the time, when i don't have to worry about money and other stuff that real life brings, and sometimes whether i'll meet anyone else -  but mostly i'm happy with my life; with my choices - and the freedom enabling me to actually have choices. I'm happy i went to Šolta - and paid for everything with my money - and happy i came back to Tacen, to a flat i'm paying for. And happy i could then go with my car to citypark and go shopping, just because. 
So life is not bad. It's not what i expected, or planned, but it's not bad. And the feeling i have when i wake up every day is not one of despair - but rather one of expectation. And that is something i'd been missing when jure and i were still together. 
So - jurč, you have a good life. I wish you all the best, and - no regrets; for neither of us.

Me, i'll be fine. I'll be just fine. :)