Remix of maiade's 'What If'

[jentremix_mod]

Title: you're the catalyst (that makes things faster)
Rating: NC-17
Group/Pairing: Arashi; Aiba/Jun
Warnings/Genre (ie mpreg, kinks, etc): ...is second-person a warning?
Notes: It is completely nerve-wracking writing from such amazing source material. I hope I didn't fuck it up too much. Thanks to T & D for their hand-holding and spacetiger for cheering me

Comments

I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVER

[maiaide]

Okay, so I think this is better than what I wrote, as happy and satisfied as I was with that piece (though I found so many things I want to change on my reread :X). This is absolutely brilliant and deep. When I wrote it, I had a vague idea of why Jun was being such a tool (totally based on a friend of mine) but this is so much better than whatever I had imagined. He's so afflicted and ignorant on purpose, like I can totally see him being in his younger days. It's not a problem if I don't acknowledge it kind of thing. You just made my day, drippy nose and fever and all!

I have to say my favourite part is this:
You're usually good at ignoring the things lurking in the back of your mind, but things start to fall apart at the end of the year. They always do. It's not only winter tearing things apart because everything feels more difficult in the cold, but also the new year because everything is meant to unravel every three hundred and sixty-five days. You succumb to the breakdown, because you're a sucker for the idea that there's

Re: I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVER

[maiaide]

I totally read it a second time and I love it even more!

[littlealex]

I know we have talked about this a billion times already but because I enjoy commenting way too much, I am going to do it over here as well.

I liked that paragraph too; not necessarily because that's the way I treat New Years, but because I love the idea of doing it. I make rationalizations and justifications for all sorts of shit that isn't based in anything, and this made perfect logical sense to me.

hearts and skin and ~feelings~
ah, it's all about the hearts and skin and ~feelings~. In this fic they were all being denied, but the slippery slope when you let yourself feel something is SUCH a fun thing to write. I like my characters reticent, if only so I can break their little outer shells apart.

And of course, the source material was brilliant. I will possibly never stop saying so. ♥

[mrsatterthwaite]

okay I can't even finish this- not because it's bad but because I wanted to read the original first, and my heart can't take being trampled on TWICE. I'm a fan of remixes that capture the mood of the original, and this does it so well. Maybe too well :P (as if that's a bad thing).

But the hardest thing in the world is to ignore Aiba Masaki, and you should have known that when you started trying.

AUGHHHHHHHHH why do you do this to me!!!!!!! (watch out for another comment soon- I just need to pull myself together ;_; )

[littlealex]

DID YOU EVER STOP DYING ENOUGH TO FINISH READING?

Because I know what you mean. When I first picked this story, I was like... oh damn, that means I need to read this gut-wrenching, heart-hurting gorgeous fic ALL OVER AGAIN A MILLION TIMES! Which wasn't sad, just... slightly emotionally draining!

I really wanted to capture the mood because, even though it wasn't Matsujun's mood to begin with, there was obviously something going on in that mind of his to make him act the way he was.

YAY FOR MUTUAL LOVE OF THE ORIGINAL. Even if it was heart-hurty ♥

[mrsatterthwaite]

yes, i finally got over it and finished ~_~ Often with great stories I have to reread things just to make sure, yes it really was that awesome. ;) I also never figured out how people pull off second person perspective so well! It is so so so amazing, and you really need to stop being so awesome (j/k haha).

[littlealex]

I think the easiest way to go into writing second person is pretend that you're writing an entire fic where the character is talking to himself. Which, when it's Matsujun, who announces to an empty apartment that he is opening the refrigerator door, is not particularly difficult. ♥ It worked well in this case I think because there was clearly a difference between what Jun was feeling deep down and what he was letting himself feel.

But... yes, it was difficult sometimes and I nearly gave up multiple times. :/

I will try to be less awesome in the future! ;)

[ununoriginal]

i normally dun even feel anything for jun/aiba, but both u and maiaide did such a fantastic job with the pairing tat i was hooked from beginning to the end &hearts

[littlealex]

Ah, I'm so glad! :D It's an unusual pairing, perhaps, but I loved what maiaide did with it, so I knew I had to give it a shot for myself. ;) I'm happy you liked it! ♥

[clarice_dragon]

*Lol* i seem to be intruding on some private conversation,

but i have to say i really like this approach very much.

[littlealex]

I'm glad you liked it! Thank you for commenting ♥

[solesakuma]

ASDADJLAHL
You made second person POV work! That alone is awesome, but really like how it resonates with the original and that the tone somewhat shifted, but in a way that's recognizable.

[littlealex]

haha, second person was hard~, but I struggled through it. ;) I'm glad you liked it, and I'm glad it resonates well - I loved the original fic so making it a fraction as awesome is what I was aiming for. ;)