Discouraged

[jenro]

I haven't been able to eat, and I haven't been able to sleep for the past few
days. When I try to eat something I get very nauteous and I end up feeding it to
the dog. I have no appetite.

I think about.. how people are so different. I think about changing of moods. I
think about how one person could cause so much harm to another, how I could be
so close to someone to let them hurt me that much. Well that won't happen again.
Awful people deserve awful people... the world is full of awful people.

I think about how I could miss someone who betrayed me, betrayed me with something
I hold so valuable. I would have done anything to hurt him. Anything. Now I have
to deal with the consequences of my actions.
And I wonder why I'm the one always left feeling guilty...

I am not normally big on confrontation. But you cannot hide the truth. It is
selfish and absurd to think that you can be physical with two different girls and
hide it from them to get what you want.

Why does bullshit seem to follow me around?
I'm not a bad person, I did what any girl would do, because it was the right thing. (I let the other girl know).
It still doesn't make me feel any better.