Just Thoughts
Sometimes we get so busy with the hassles of every day life that we forget little things. Like I never thought that I would miss the sound of an infants cry. I so badly do though. I never thought that I would miss the nervous but oh so funny laugh of my niece Chrissy. The way my niece Caroline talks and talks with no end in sight and I wasn't even sure that I caught all she said. The way my niece Catlyn is so sweet and caring about people and when I wanted cookies so bad she made them for me to help me out. I also certainly never thought that I would miss watching my nephew grow up as much as I do. Some might say that you have your children with you watch them but there are things that our used to being a part of every day life that you just want to have.
I am very much guilty of not being thankful for what I had when I had it. It's a shame that I realize that now though. Even now living 2000 miles away from my family in California I know how blessed I am to have them in my life. There are many things that we have been given in life. Many things that have been taken. Many things that are yet to be given. It those few things in the future that keep us going and moving one day closer to the final prize. Whatever you believe whatever you think might happen none of that matters because in the end we all want the same thing HAPPINESS.
Last night I had such a hard time sleeping and yet this morning here I am wide awake ready for the day. Am I tired yes very much so am I ready to face the day probably not but I will. I am trying to look at the brighter things in life. The fact that I have been given another day to be a mother to my children is a blessing all in itself.
There is a saying that I have heard said and it's when Life gives you lemons make lemonade. That is so silly what if ya don't like lemonade right. What if ya don't fee like squeezing those lemons. I am going to start looking at life as ok so I don't want to take the time to squeeze those lemons but thank God I have the ability to do so. When I am quick to say I miss my babies being babies I will remind myself just how lucky I am to watch them grow into the beautiful children they are. Some are not as lucky as I am.
Have I been handed everything in life? No. Has my life been so very easy that I never complained? No. Have I always made the right choices and never hurt anyone? No. That's life though you live and you learn but you live to see another day.
Right now some friends and family of mine are going through difficult times. Not just one or two people but quite a few. Not sure why people I love have to hurt and suffer and even have dreams put on hold for a short time but I do know that I surround myself with the strongest of strong, the truest of true. I know that in the end all good things come to those who wait. As hard as that is and as difficult as it is to say. Good things will come I know it and I believe it.
Not sure what happened to me since last night when I finally crawled into bed after complaining about not being able to sleep. I guess I am just happier today. I have a roof over my head. My children are healthy. Jack is making changes to better himself (thankyou God). My mom and dad and my in-laws are both getting ready to celebrate 36 years of marriage how awesome is that. Even though I have not seen her my sister is right on track to being one of the healthiest people I know. My brother although struggling right now makes me proud to be his sister every day when I hear the laughter of my nephew and know that he is trying so hard to be the best dad and husband he can.
I guess it's just the little things in life that make your heart grow. I am making my vow to start living more by my favorite quote then ever before. To live each day as if it were my last. I have been questioned on that and they say that you act like you dont care if tomorrow comes. It's not that its about living and loving to the best of my ability. No one is promised tomorrow and if you put off for tomorrow what you can do today you might regret it. It's more important now to show the love that everyone deserves then to hope that they realize it when they question it the most.
I keep not wanting to right such long blogs but I just get going and dont shut-up. I just wanted to jot down some thoughts in my head on this early friday morning. I wish you all a great weekend and much happiness.