Fic: Martin, The Bachelor
Title: Martin, The Bachelor
Pairing/characters: Martin, Carolyn, Arthur
Rating: G
Warnings/Triggers: None
Word count: 460
Summary: Filled for Cabin Pressure prompt meme. Carolyn has a publicity idea for MJN Air involving Martin. Martin is not pleased.
“Good God, Carolyn....did you really sign me up as a contestant for the Bachelorette?”
“Martin, this will be good publicity for MJN Air, god knows we need it. The charming young American chap we flew last week is auditioning young, thirty-ish men for a new American reality TV show.”
“New? Mum, the Bachelorette is in its 4th series! And it’s Brilliant. People falling in love on TV is Brilliant.”
“Arthur, since when did you watch the bachelor? Last I checked, we had no cable telly on our plane.”
“Mum has 100 channels on our telly, Andy from the fire crew said the Bachelorette is very educating for a young chap like I. Something about the birds and the beetles and ferns doing gymnastic type-things while rolling in the hay. It sounds better than the discovery channel! Though now that I think about it, there are no magic birds and beetles and ferns on the bachelorette, just a lot of men and women in very small clothes. Still, I watched all four seasons in case I caught a glimpse of magic bees, beetles and ferns and ladybugs...or is that ladykillers he was saying-“
“Anyways! Carolyn, you cannot do this to me. I am a respected captain! It might tarnish my reputation by associating with these young disreputable women.”
“First of all, there is only ONE woman you have to have to compete for, and her reputation has been vouched for, as the 8th place contestant of the Amazing Race and Survivor. I have never seen either shows, but that’s as good of a resume as any! She’s both a fit and resourceful young woman, which is what you need in a girlfriend, Martin. Second, you’re a captain in uniform, which has to have some clout. God knows I’ve fallen for enough captains in my life time, they have a certain je ne sais quoi that you lack, but hopefully the uniform and title will rub off on you. Third, you are British and Americans love British accents. You automatically sound posh and erudite to the untrained American ear. See? You already have an advantage over the competition.”
“Oh right Carolyn, I can seduce her with my magic fairy dust voice. That would work out really well.”
“Face it Martin, it will be good publicity for MJN Air. It is a win-win situation. We get coverage and free publicity, you have a chance of getting a new girlfriend, or even better...dating tips from other contestants to further help you in finding a Mrs. Crieff. I can make it worth your while...say...a week of Douglas’s pay for every week you manage to stay on the telly?”
“Oh hell...Do you have a nice suit I can borrow? One has to make a good first impression...”