Mar 23, 2006 00:36
Dear Lord can you take it away?
This pain in my heart that follows me by day
And at night it stalks me like the shadows on my wall
Oh my goodness
Feels like the world is closin' on me
Feels like my dreams will never come to
me
I keep on slippin' deeper into myself
And I'm scared, so scared
~ alicia keys ~
most people have noticed ive been cranky lately. im not gonna call it depression becuz i dont like when people say they are depressed, but whatever you call someone being unhappy almost all the time for no reason besides life in general, thats what i am. i think it has a lot to do with darrell obviously, cuz i was generally happy before i met him, and after he left, i went into some weird not as social stage. i dont really know what has happened with that but seeing as he makes no effort to talk to me or anything, im guessin its not goin at all. honestly, ive talked to a million pepople about it, and my grandma made me feel the best about whats goin on.
i like talkin to jay too. we both basically feel the same about life at the moment, but he has one thing i dont have and thats stephanie...well, stephs in my life too, but, u know :)anyways...i guess thanx to jay for being there. kings island should be fun. just me and him easter break.
the first free weekend i get to myself, im getting a hotel a half hour away with a gym and im staying there by myself, and im not answering my phone or anything and i cant wait. too bad that wont be for a month, but still.
my oakland audition went better, but i still dont know anything if its gonna be good or not. theres always a flight attendant, or massage therapist. anyways...
GOOD LUCK SHELLY!!! ur gonna be a beautiful amazing belle which really means beautiful amazing beauty. now its no wonder that her names means beauty...u know. anywho, i love u!
thats all for now.