(no subject)
Dear Grandmother of all Waynes,
In the kindest way I can put this, you and your future generations do not belong in a domestic setting. I really don't mean to go all Adolf Hitler by destructing your homes and killing your babies, but I'm a person who likes her adobe well-kept and critter free. I believe that those of your species belong best in the wilderness. You know, like a bush of sprawling branches where you are free to weave your webs, where a delicious swarm of insects are more likely to be caught for a summer evening's feast.
But when you cross into the forbidden territories of domesticity, I will forget our peace treaty and be completely ruthless. I slaughtered a dozen of your kin today without a grimace. In fact, I just squished one with tissue paper and another youngin' with my bare fingertips. It was barely a millimeter big. And this is not the end. The war will go on until I can last five days without busting out my vacuum and singing out, hasta la vista, baby!
If you know what's best for you and your families, please retreat.
Sincerely,
The Terminator
In the kindest way I can put this, you and your future generations do not belong in a domestic setting. I really don't mean to go all Adolf Hitler by destructing your homes and killing your babies, but I'm a person who likes her adobe well-kept and critter free. I believe that those of your species belong best in the wilderness. You know, like a bush of sprawling branches where you are free to weave your webs, where a delicious swarm of insects are more likely to be caught for a summer evening's feast.
But when you cross into the forbidden territories of domesticity, I will forget our peace treaty and be completely ruthless. I slaughtered a dozen of your kin today without a grimace. In fact, I just squished one with tissue paper and another youngin' with my bare fingertips. It was barely a millimeter big. And this is not the end. The war will go on until I can last five days without busting out my vacuum and singing out, hasta la vista, baby!
If you know what's best for you and your families, please retreat.
Sincerely,
The Terminator