Hurrah for the ER
For the last 2.5 hours I sat in the emergency room with Kevin and John, awaiting stitches in John's chin. Apparently some guy head butted him in a hockey game, resulting in a rather large gash that allows one a fairly good view inside his face. We were just chilling and John was going to be called in pretty soon when my mother called and deemed it necessary to come get me.
While Kevin offered to drive me, my mother insisted on picking me up. She also thought it was shady that I didn't want her to come get me, as if I was using the emergency room as a cover. Anyway, in the car on the way home I finally told her that I can't stand being treated like a 12 year old and yes, I was sick but yes, I'm better and it's time to let me move on. I told her that it's not that I don't understand her intentions but I am 19 years old and it worries me that she doesn't trust me when I'm in Cary with kids I've grown up with, much less when I'm an hour and a half away at school. I told her obviously she thinks I hate her but I don't and the comic she dedicated to me and put on the refrigerator for everyone to see really hurt my feelings, to which she responded "ok". It was kinda like she was glad that I was upset and hurt, like she was getting back at me. When I asked her if she was listening and understood what I was saying or if she had just started ignoring me she said she "heard me". Not understood, but heard, whatever that means. And when I asked her what she thought she said she wasn't going to respond because I would "only think she's being defensive", thus she refused to say anything.
This is driving me nuts! I try to talk to her, to start some sort of open communication even though we've never really had any, and it doesn't work. How can I have any real relationship with my own mother if she won't talk with me? She thinks I like Mrs. R better than her. While I do love Mrs. R she is still not my mother and will never replace her. I would love to be able to have the same kind of relationship with my mom, though, but she doesn't want to hear what I have to say and refuses to listen when I say something she doesn't agree with. She's so closed minded about some things and she raised me not to be, so I don't know what to do. I just want to have an actual functioning relationship with my mom before I'm completely moved out and really lose any chance of building one. It kills me that I can't talk to her and do the normal "mother/daughter bonding" thing. I'm at a complete loss for what to do now. Maybe some of what I said will sink in and she'll actually talk to me. Maybe not. I guess it's really out of my hands for the moment.
Plus I hope John's ok. He'll probably have a big scar, but chicks dig scars so that's no big. :P
While Kevin offered to drive me, my mother insisted on picking me up. She also thought it was shady that I didn't want her to come get me, as if I was using the emergency room as a cover. Anyway, in the car on the way home I finally told her that I can't stand being treated like a 12 year old and yes, I was sick but yes, I'm better and it's time to let me move on. I told her that it's not that I don't understand her intentions but I am 19 years old and it worries me that she doesn't trust me when I'm in Cary with kids I've grown up with, much less when I'm an hour and a half away at school. I told her obviously she thinks I hate her but I don't and the comic she dedicated to me and put on the refrigerator for everyone to see really hurt my feelings, to which she responded "ok". It was kinda like she was glad that I was upset and hurt, like she was getting back at me. When I asked her if she was listening and understood what I was saying or if she had just started ignoring me she said she "heard me". Not understood, but heard, whatever that means. And when I asked her what she thought she said she wasn't going to respond because I would "only think she's being defensive", thus she refused to say anything.
This is driving me nuts! I try to talk to her, to start some sort of open communication even though we've never really had any, and it doesn't work. How can I have any real relationship with my own mother if she won't talk with me? She thinks I like Mrs. R better than her. While I do love Mrs. R she is still not my mother and will never replace her. I would love to be able to have the same kind of relationship with my mom, though, but she doesn't want to hear what I have to say and refuses to listen when I say something she doesn't agree with. She's so closed minded about some things and she raised me not to be, so I don't know what to do. I just want to have an actual functioning relationship with my mom before I'm completely moved out and really lose any chance of building one. It kills me that I can't talk to her and do the normal "mother/daughter bonding" thing. I'm at a complete loss for what to do now. Maybe some of what I said will sink in and she'll actually talk to me. Maybe not. I guess it's really out of my hands for the moment.
Plus I hope John's ok. He'll probably have a big scar, but chicks dig scars so that's no big. :P