sm monthly November 2009 Challenge Day 10 "Fashion"
This is completely pointless, but I had fun writing it ...
Title: The End of the Ugly Green Jackets
Author/Artist: Jenbunny
Medium: Fanfic
Theme: Day 10: Fashion
Genre: comedy
Version: I'm not sure ... anime I guess, though it might fit AU better
Rating: G
Mamoru frowned as he opened his closet door, knowing he had a difficult task ahead of him. He had promised to get rid of his favorite green jackets once and for all. It was a request that he couldn’t deny, though he had tried hard enough.
From this day on he would know better then to promise Usagi that she could have anything for her birthday that she wanted, anything at all. Dangerous requests could come of it, like this one for instance. He should have just gotten her some jewelry, or flowers, or anything under the sun. At this point Mamoru would have been willing to go out of his way to get something, even spend tons of money, just for the chance to be able to keep his jackets. Alas, Usagi wasn’t having it. She had insisted that this was the only thing that would make her happy on her birthday and being the honorable man that Mamoru was he couldn’t back out of a promise now.
People had told him that he had a horrid sense of fashion before, but they had never forced him to give up his jackets. They might have laughed at them, whispered horrible death threats to it behind his back, even threatened to send Stacy and Clinton from that American show ‘What Not to Wear’ after him, but he could handle that. He could ignore them, but how was he going to give up his beloved jackets.
Mamoru sighed before taking the first jacket off of its hanger and tossing it to the bed. He was Tuxedo Kamen. He had faced down many a youma armed with only a rose, a cane, and an inspirational speech. Surely he could deny himself the comfort of a familiar piece of clothing, especially if it was for his Usako. He could do anything for her, right?
He continued pulling his jackets out of the closet and tossing them to the bed, remembering the day he had bought each and every one of them. Mamoru couldn’t understand why people hated his jackets so very much. Sure they were kind of an ugly color, but they were comfortable. Didn’t that count for anything? Wasn’t a person suppose to buy comfortable clothes?
Finished clearing the closet out, Mamoru headed over to the bed staring forlornly at the jackets laying there. Now that he saw them all laying there, he had to admit that he had an awful lot of them and they really were the ugliest green color imaginable, perhaps it was time to give them up. Very soon now it wouldn’t matter much anyway. He would be putting on his brand new lavender tuxedo for the very first time. Mamoru knew that he wore tuxedos well and purple was a royal color, fit for the King of Earth. No one could complain about that, it was more then fashionable ... right? Of course it was.
Later that week ...
"Happy Birthday Usako ..."
Usagi’s eyes lit up with a strange sort of glee as she unwrapped the box and found all of Mamoru’s jackets inside. "Thank you Mamo-chan, this is the best present I’ve received all day."
Mamoru gave his fiancé an uneasy smile before commenting, "That’s a strange sort of birthday gift though Usako. What do you intend to do with all of those jackets?"
Usagi glanced curiously at Mamoru before asking, "Are you sure you really want to know Mamo-chan? You probably won’t like it very much ..."
Mamoru shrugged warily and said, "I gave them to you Usako. You can do with them what you will. Some of them are still fairly new though, will you give them away to other people?"
Usagi immediately shook her head at that idea. "Of course not, I couldn’t do that to anyone. Imagine burdening some poor soul with them, no I have other plans. Plans that will ultimately save the world from having to ever look upon those ugly green jackets again ..."
Mamoru laughed nervously, unconsciously shifting protectively toward his jackets. "What kind of plans Usa ..."
The blonde hesitated, knowing how much her Mamo-chan loved his jackets. She didn’t want to hurt his feelings or anything, but really those jackets had long outlived the fate that they deserved. Finally she pointed toward her sister senshi across the room, who had all been watching the exchange in fascination and trying hard not to laugh. "First I plan to give them to Hotaru and Haruka so that they can slash them all in to little pieces. Then when they are no more then tiny little pieces of ugly green specks, I plan to give them to Rei so that she can incinerate them. The other girls can have the ashes to do what ever they like with them, provided of course I no longer have to see them. After which I plan on working on attempting to get the perfect Christmas gift ..."
Mamoru paled considerably as he listened to the fate his poor green jackets had in store for them. He had to forcibly resist the urge to snatch the box and run away with them. Sometimes sacrifices had to be made, even if his beloved jackets had kept him comfortable for years ... it was all in the interest of keeping Usagi happy after all. "It’s a little early to be thinking about Christmas isn’t it? Surely you don’t already know what you want ..."
Usagi gave Mamoru an innocent smile, visions of destroying his brand new sunset colored tuxedo already flitting through her head. "Trust me ... I already know what I want."
Mamoru resolved once again to never promise Usagi he would get her whatever her heart desired. It was far too dangerous.