ha ha ha ha ha ha hahaha fuck you.
well, how about ending my vacation back at work? i was supposed to have off today and monday, but no dice.
So, here i am... but i have an appointment at 130 so i can leave at one which i feel is better than leaving at three.
I'm in a bad place in thought. Theres nothing unusual about this. everything is making waves. really over powering waves....
i haven't been leaving the house. i sit and watch tv... i'm scared to talk to people, it's getting worse. ken's always there... but sometimes, and only sometimes, i forget he's there since we're so quiet... and i pull myself in realizing i just thought i was alone and realized i wasn't... you DON'T really know what kind of feeling that is...i believe it's at the point where i can't imagine my life without him... he's a permanent part of me... we've spent everyday together for the past year now... that has to have an effect on the way i'll see through my eyes. black dots... that has no deep meaning, so don't waste time reading into it... i feel better knowing he's around. i also feel my mind shifting in directions and thoughts i don't want... the world is only as big as your mind. My mind is too big.
i still remain,
So, here i am... but i have an appointment at 130 so i can leave at one which i feel is better than leaving at three.
I'm in a bad place in thought. Theres nothing unusual about this. everything is making waves. really over powering waves....
i haven't been leaving the house. i sit and watch tv... i'm scared to talk to people, it's getting worse. ken's always there... but sometimes, and only sometimes, i forget he's there since we're so quiet... and i pull myself in realizing i just thought i was alone and realized i wasn't... you DON'T really know what kind of feeling that is...i believe it's at the point where i can't imagine my life without him... he's a permanent part of me... we've spent everyday together for the past year now... that has to have an effect on the way i'll see through my eyes. black dots... that has no deep meaning, so don't waste time reading into it... i feel better knowing he's around. i also feel my mind shifting in directions and thoughts i don't want... the world is only as big as your mind. My mind is too big.
i still remain,