ramble.
i just got back from my calculus tutoring session a little while ago. at the end of every session, our tutor asks us if we have any other questions about anything, including the meaning of life. today he claimed that the meaning of life is (simply put), 42. he's cute in a very nerdy "wow math is so cool and so are video games" way.
so as i was walking back to my dorm room, i began thinking...what really is the meaning of life?
no wonder why so many philosophers have spent so many hours pondering over this question. is it different for everyone?
looking at my surroundings and reflecting, i thought to myself that whatever the meaning of life is, i'm getting there. this may sound ridiculously optimistic, but i really do feel so lucky to have such wonderful people around me.
and then i began thinking about the virginia tech shooting. these students had their lives cut short; they were in the prime of their lives, and then one day a psychotic student decides to play god and take everything away from them. it's horrifying because these people were the same age as me, in the same setting as me, and now they are gone. all their ambitions, goals, now lost. i was reading up on the people killed, and so many of them sound like people i could have known. yesterday my math teacher came into our class wearing a virginia tech hoodie, shirt, and cap. he was very flustered throughout class and explained to the class that he knows people who work in the building where the shooting occurred, and that he spent quite some time doing research/whatnot there. this incident really hits hard at home.
when I got back to my room, i opened the windows and overheard one of the housekeeping ladies talking to a guy downstairs. she asked him to go to her daughter's birthday. curious, i peeked down and it was a guy dressed as raggedy andy. i'm talking to whole get-up - overalls, striped socks, red yarn mophead, etc. i've seen him several times dressed like this, biking to his dorm. anyways, he then explained to her that he couldn't make it, since he has to visit sick children at a hospital that day.
i don't exactly know how to put in words how all of these events made me feel...but right now, i feel like i really ought to be doing more. i have things so easy right now. i swear that i'm gonna start going to CAB meetings and do more volunteer work. i think i'm starting to realize that there really is no point in life unless you (as cliche as this sounds) do something to make the world a better place. i am way beyond content for my life...i need nothing. now, i really should give something in return.
i think this is my favorite poem:
First day of spring -- the sky
is bright blue, the sun huge and warm.
Everything's turning green
Carrying my monk's bowl, I walk to the village
to beg for my meal.
The children spot me at the temple gate
and happily crowd around,
dragging at my arms 'til I stop.
I put my bowl on a white rock,
hang my bag on a branch.
First we braid grasses and play tug-of-war,
then we take turns singing and keeping a kick-ball in the air:
I kick the ball and they sing, they kick and I sing.
TIme is forgotten, the hours fly.
People passing by point at me and laugh:
"Why are you acting like a fool?"
I nod my head and don't answer.
I could say something, but why?
Do you want to know what's in my heart?
From the beginning of time: just this! just this!
Ryokan
note to self: stop putting things off 'til later. life is now. don't be afraid to take risks - you may never get another chance.
oh, and a sidenote: i'm sorry if this entry weirds you guys out. i'm trying to now write in my livejournal as i do with my private journal. a lot of times it really doesn't make sense.
i'm gonna listen to some kelly clarkson music now :D
so as i was walking back to my dorm room, i began thinking...what really is the meaning of life?
no wonder why so many philosophers have spent so many hours pondering over this question. is it different for everyone?
looking at my surroundings and reflecting, i thought to myself that whatever the meaning of life is, i'm getting there. this may sound ridiculously optimistic, but i really do feel so lucky to have such wonderful people around me.
and then i began thinking about the virginia tech shooting. these students had their lives cut short; they were in the prime of their lives, and then one day a psychotic student decides to play god and take everything away from them. it's horrifying because these people were the same age as me, in the same setting as me, and now they are gone. all their ambitions, goals, now lost. i was reading up on the people killed, and so many of them sound like people i could have known. yesterday my math teacher came into our class wearing a virginia tech hoodie, shirt, and cap. he was very flustered throughout class and explained to the class that he knows people who work in the building where the shooting occurred, and that he spent quite some time doing research/whatnot there. this incident really hits hard at home.
when I got back to my room, i opened the windows and overheard one of the housekeeping ladies talking to a guy downstairs. she asked him to go to her daughter's birthday. curious, i peeked down and it was a guy dressed as raggedy andy. i'm talking to whole get-up - overalls, striped socks, red yarn mophead, etc. i've seen him several times dressed like this, biking to his dorm. anyways, he then explained to her that he couldn't make it, since he has to visit sick children at a hospital that day.
i don't exactly know how to put in words how all of these events made me feel...but right now, i feel like i really ought to be doing more. i have things so easy right now. i swear that i'm gonna start going to CAB meetings and do more volunteer work. i think i'm starting to realize that there really is no point in life unless you (as cliche as this sounds) do something to make the world a better place. i am way beyond content for my life...i need nothing. now, i really should give something in return.
i think this is my favorite poem:
First day of spring -- the sky
is bright blue, the sun huge and warm.
Everything's turning green
Carrying my monk's bowl, I walk to the village
to beg for my meal.
The children spot me at the temple gate
and happily crowd around,
dragging at my arms 'til I stop.
I put my bowl on a white rock,
hang my bag on a branch.
First we braid grasses and play tug-of-war,
then we take turns singing and keeping a kick-ball in the air:
I kick the ball and they sing, they kick and I sing.
TIme is forgotten, the hours fly.
People passing by point at me and laugh:
"Why are you acting like a fool?"
I nod my head and don't answer.
I could say something, but why?
Do you want to know what's in my heart?
From the beginning of time: just this! just this!
Ryokan
note to self: stop putting things off 'til later. life is now. don't be afraid to take risks - you may never get another chance.
oh, and a sidenote: i'm sorry if this entry weirds you guys out. i'm trying to now write in my livejournal as i do with my private journal. a lot of times it really doesn't make sense.
i'm gonna listen to some kelly clarkson music now :D