well than.. happy?
well where the fuck do i begin?
oo and to let EVERYONE KNOW!- you got what you wanted, i am doing what you ALL said from the beginning....im moving on from adam. HAPPY? now i need to get through the damn bumps in the road from this... im happy hes moving on and now its my turn, ive let myself die in the rot of hell because of the damn word love... well i hate it. we all go through it right? well i dont want it no more. i just want someone who wants me, dont want to use me, will treat me right, and shows they want me... im still very scared to do this.. all new territory, new people, get to know a person all over again, gain the trust, gain the happiness..go through the damn bullshit arguements and fights again, and im going to feel like a virgin all over again when i ( if i) screw someone.. im just so damn scared. i dont want to go through hurt alll over again, i dont want to die inside all over again, i dont want to cry at night all over again. but u all should be satisfied.. i have as u put it " rid him, or get over him, or forget him " but that does not mean he is not my friend. i love him to death, that kid is my true best friend.. he has ALWAYS been there for me and as he says and which i believe ALWAYS WILL BE. nothing will ruin our friendship, maybe we weren't destined to be together as a couple and love eachother like that..but friends.. i feel there was a reason i met him..and maybe it was that he was just a best friend i needed in life that came along. so just that lil update for those that want me to move on so fast and w/e.. i am finally letting go.. now again.. HAPPY?..damn.
--- almost got my permit slip..once i get my last 4 hours in.. and i would have gotten 2 in yesterday if that douche instrutor didn't fuck up the scheduals!!
-- got my new cell phone, all hooked up, and happy because now people can call whenever and vis versa! no more no past 10 bullshit! *smiles* want the number then IM me.. and ill give.
- my brother is now living in florida and that really makes me sad that i have my brother and my sister and nephew down there.. but i am GLAD they are safe and what not..i wish them the best.
-- i think i am going to dye my hair blonde, ( dont kill me! lol) and then dye it a brown.. what do you think?
-- school is not going so good.. cna i say failing? behind? ooo haha i just did... ya that is me. lol. i think it is funny since it is my first time slacking off that bad! -- i got some paper in the paper saying i am qualified for scholorships already, and that colleges have my name and are looking into me already, and when im a senior and am looking for a college i can use the " college service program" since i am qualified. i guess only the "highly achieved" gets this award and im going in some book? haha too bad i dont want college lmao.
-- going to P.A. soon!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
thats it i think.
-valari