(no subject)
Why is it that we believe when in a relationship all the lonesome and despair will suddenly depart? As I sat down on my balcony drinking my glass of wine and smoking my fathers marlbro lights I felt a sudden rush of happyness, I mean sure, I was alone, but it was real. The best feeling is the one where you give to yourself. When its YOU who controls every emotion, every plan. Right now I have everything I wanted a month ago. The boyfriend, the feelings, even the fights, but for once that’s not what I want. It wasn’t the boyfriend that I wanted, it was the past I wanted. The feelings, the touch, the sudden heartbeats when you see him.. that’s what I wanted. That’s what we girls do, we approach every relationship wanting the exact same thing, but we don’t seem to comprehend that you get those feelings only once in a life time.. With that one guy. So why force it again??, why would you even attempt to replay the exact same things.?. It was memories you once held with someone, and for that someone.. They’re gone.. We need to stop expecting everything to be the way it used to be.. Because nothing in life repeats itself…Take a moment..look back .. isn’t everything that happens a new experience ? Sure, it can be somewhat similar..but never the same.. We have got to settle for that..