** The Life and Times of Harvey Shapiro
What would happen if people switched jobs for a day? Imagine your butcher chopping up your garbage. Or the local cop being your lawyer. What if the Movie or Theater Reviewer wrote an obituary. It might go something like this.
Harvey Shapiro died last night, putting him and us out of our misery! Although his life had promise, it was often long and tedious. The life began with a good deal of excitement, The opening scene contained its share of blood and guts, but soon fell into a boring pattern.
The sex scenes were few and far between. This viewer found that the pacing of the scenes was way too fast leaving this critic and no doubt Harvey’s partners completely unsatisfied.
The part of Harvey’s long suffering wife was played by Betty Shapiro. In this uninteresting role of the shrew, Betty is constantly hounding this poor nebbish, Harvey. Had she ever evolved into an empathetic character it would have made the life more interesting.
The one interesting character was Harvey’s trollop. Played with verve and style by Bubbles LaRue Rabinowitz. After a few fast encounters (Bubbles didn’t seem to mind the speed), Harvey decides to "save" her. He takes her to meet his Rabbi, Solomon Rabinowitz. Solomon, although obviously gay, and Bubbles fall in love and marry. This lasts until Bubbles takes the part of a young man’s Bar Mitzvah speech, where he avers, "Today, I am a man," to an absurd conclusion. Unfortunately, this interesting character is never heard from again.
A few tumultuous affairs occasionally piqued this writers interest. But, just like most other events in Harvey’s life they all climaxed prematurely.
The end came none to soon as he lingered for what seemed like an eternity, while Betty dutifully sat at his bedside complaining.
As cruel as this sounds, I’m glad it’s over. I bet so is Betty. I know that Harvey is glad!