Will I even remember this?
So right now I'm curled up in my bed at 2:30am before finals week stressing about grades, jobs, and self-loathing. This is practically all my life is right now. When I've grown up, presuming I grow up, will any of this ever come to mind again? Will I view it like another dumb vague memory from back before I knew better? All this shit going on in my head won't stop. My future everyday life might be so blissfully free of all of this. I guess that would be good, but it sounds so scary. Everything that means something right now just deemed irrelevant and thrown into the memories incinerator. All these worries might turn out to be useless. I'm not sure if that would be better than ending up a failure and finding out they had merit. For someone who does so poorly, my pride is quite high.
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