my everything hurts

[jellocake]

a bleeding boy
crushed soul
he's crying
and screaming
lying on the ground.
my brother's heart
will be broken
and i can't hold
his hand.
because i'm
f
a
l
l
i
n
g
into a million
and one pieces on
the floor.
scattered besides
broken glass;
the life
i gave my everything
my love my heart
my family is
everything.
and it's
breaking
the heart i have
inside into
chest heavy
PAIN. WHY
WON'T IT STOP.
why
why
won't it
go
away
.....
my cheeks
are
so wet. i can't
remember the last
time i cried like this
felt like
THIS
oh god.
like this.
my
heart stops beating
and my fingers shake
they shake
and the fear
pain
progressing
through
my very body down my arms
in my chest.
my stomach
rejects food.
my heart feels
like
nothing i've ever
never ever
felt.
my life was a breeze
until i felt this.
had to
feel
LIKE THIS IT'S KILLING ME.
it's BEATING ON ME
it's wearing me DOWN.
i can't
breathe. my brother
is going to be alone
I SHOULD BE THERE
I CAN'T be there
i can't watch
i can't
feel.
i can't even see right now.
i'm crying so hard.
thinking
of the pain
it's going to cause.
i can't type
causei can'tsee.