Delight
One of the things I've been wrestling with this year is harshness toward myself. I struggle to accept God's love for me. I feel like I will only ever grieve Him. I believe that I'm incapable of bringing Him delight. I don't seek the crown of life - I feel guilty for wanting to share in glory. I'm drawn to the descriptions of our Lord's Passion,
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Yes, I certainly don't want to be proud and deceive myself. I don't want to think that I'm worthy of God's love, like the Pharisee acted in Luke 18:9-14. I know that apart from Christ, I'm a hopeless sinner under God's righteous wrath. Praise be to God that He saves us in His Beloved Son, Jesus Christ. All praise be to God for His grace and saving love, which Christ our Savior has won for us through His life, death, resurrection, and ascension!
And I don't want to presume and assume that I'm already at rest - we Christians are still striving for that eternal rest (Hebrews 4:9). Oh, may Our Good Father keep us safe in Christ and teach us how to live day by day as we follow Jesus as His disciples. May He make us more and more like Our Master Jesus. Praise be to God our Savior, who is able to keep us from falling, and to make us stand without blemish in the presence of his glory with rejoicing! (Jude 1:24)
I just wanted to rejoice in the amazing love and kindness that God shows to us in Christ, like Peter describes in the first chapter of his first letter. I wanted to rejoice in the joy that Jesus invites His disciples into, as they walk in obedience to God (John 15:10-11, 1 Corinthians 13:6). I just wanted to be like a little child, rejoicing in Our Father's love for us, who adopts us as His own children in Christ (1 John 3:1). I must hide myself in Christ alone and walk in Him, the Way. In Christ Jesus is our life and our hope. There's no place for pride in that rejoicing - only for praising God our Creator, Savior, and King <3
So yes, let me see myself as nothing - I deserve nothing but wrath. Let me not trust in myself, but trust in His holiness and great mercy to save us. Let me live by faith in the Son of God who loved us and gave Himself for us. All praise and glory to Jesus our mighty Savior (Luke 1:69, Hebrews 7:25) who loves us to the end (John 13:1, Matthew 28:20) <3
Love you! *hugs*
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