(no subject)
i just can't stand watching/hearing/reading all these stories from Southeast Asia. It truly is heartbreaking. I've already cried my eyes out twice today, and I've only been awake since 1115. It's just such a horrible thing to have to experience. I can only imagine what those actually experiencing it first hand are feeling. Stories keep flooding in (pardon the pun) about survival: including one Australian mother who, when the wave hit, had to choose which son to hold on to. Thanks be to God that the other son (five years old) was able to hold on to a door and was found 2 hours later. He doesn't even know how to swim. I heard that story just seconds ago and cried again.
All these emotions came to a head last night when I found out about Doug's death. I didn't sleep at all last night. Not well, anyway. The cat woke me up around 415: he was coughing a lot and had me very worried. i sat with him making sure he was ok, for about an hour. I went back to bed only to have my head racing with thoughts about the horrible news i'd seen that day. not to mention memories of Doug and what a great guy he really was. i managed to fall asleep around 630 for about an hour and a half, but was woken again when the apartment next door (apt 37) is getting renovated. then the cleaning person came and cleaned the hallway. I didn't sleep again. I just sat in bed, watching TV, playing with the cat. crying occasionally.
I really with 2004 will hurry up and end. It's been such an emotional roller coaster of a year. capped off with 4 deaths of acquaintances or more since june. Ronzo, Rachael Brennan-Gatto, Chuck Martin and now Doug Kreuger. I was never really close to these people, but their deaths each affected me a great deal. The fact that you see someone habitually in everyday life and the next day, they can be gone is quite surreal. Why is it we, as humans, don't truly cherish the time we have with loved ones until they are gone...taken from us. Yes, it's all part of God's plan, and there is a reason for everything, but that doesn't change the fact that it still hurts. A lot.
All these emotions came to a head last night when I found out about Doug's death. I didn't sleep at all last night. Not well, anyway. The cat woke me up around 415: he was coughing a lot and had me very worried. i sat with him making sure he was ok, for about an hour. I went back to bed only to have my head racing with thoughts about the horrible news i'd seen that day. not to mention memories of Doug and what a great guy he really was. i managed to fall asleep around 630 for about an hour and a half, but was woken again when the apartment next door (apt 37) is getting renovated. then the cleaning person came and cleaned the hallway. I didn't sleep again. I just sat in bed, watching TV, playing with the cat. crying occasionally.
I really with 2004 will hurry up and end. It's been such an emotional roller coaster of a year. capped off with 4 deaths of acquaintances or more since june. Ronzo, Rachael Brennan-Gatto, Chuck Martin and now Doug Kreuger. I was never really close to these people, but their deaths each affected me a great deal. The fact that you see someone habitually in everyday life and the next day, they can be gone is quite surreal. Why is it we, as humans, don't truly cherish the time we have with loved ones until they are gone...taken from us. Yes, it's all part of God's plan, and there is a reason for everything, but that doesn't change the fact that it still hurts. A lot.