That guy with the blog?
A friend of a friend, or an acquaintance of a friend, a person I've only met once, refered to me as, "that guy with the blog?"
I don't write in this much anymore, and my friends have been giving me hell. They call me and say, "why don't you write in your journal anymore?" To which my reply is, "What do you want to know? I can tell you right now."
I really haven't had much to talk about really... but I'll give it a try, for old times sake.
One of my joys is reading things written by David Sedaris, he makes me laugh. I was able to see him do a reading about a year ago, and he signed some books afterward, but like an idiot I forgot to bring my book, and even if I did, I wasn't crazy about the line that wrapped up the grand spiraling staircase in they Morton Myerson Center in Dallas, TX. So, I have no signed David Sedaris book... I HAD no signed David Sedaris book. Mr. Sedaris was kind enough to stop back by the Dallas area this past week and do a mini-reading at a Borders books. His signing took place at seven in the evening, I got off work at five in the evening- and drove staight over to the Borders, it took me twenty minutes or so to get there, and there were still a good thirty people in front of me, and very quickly thirty plus people found themselves behind me.
Unfortunately I found myself there by myself, whereas most people came in groups, and they were chatty people.
"I love David Sedaris. I'm his biggest fan. I've read Me Talk Pretty One Day nine hundred times."
"I went to New York to see David Sedaris. Well, I didn't actually get to see him there, but..."
"Have you ever read Chuck Palahniuk? He's my favorite. He wrote Fight Club. Best movie ever."
"I just got done reading this erotic novel."
Meahwhile I'm thinking, "WHOA! Do I tell you every thought that passes through my head? No. No I don't. Do you know why? Because you're a stranger, and I don't need strangers hating me. You know how I feel about you right now?"
Then, while waiting in line, something else occurred to me. I'm waiting in line to meet David Sedaris. What the hell am I going to say to David Sedaris. He's a funny guy. I'm a funny guy, or at least that's what my friends say, but here's the thing. It's a book tour. All over America, in Borders, and other book stores all over America people wait in line, people think to themselves, "I'm going to say something funny, and I'm going to make David Sedaris laugh." This maybe a bit post modern- but there's only so much funny in the world. How many people have said, "Hey sign mine to the Rooster?" or something along those lines?
About a month ago, some friends and I went to see Jonathan Safron Foer, author of Everything is Illuminated and Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close at a book signing at the Dallas Museum of Art. He's a relatively young guy, younger than me... and this would be his second book tour. My thought while watching him sign books is, "How do you go from sitting behind your desk, straining, sweating, spitting, and trying to write something that's worth a damn. How do you go through all that self doubt, to thinking, maybe, just maybe you've written something worth wild- to sitting behind a desk, signing copies of a book you wrote, looking at the fifty, sixty, one hundred people in line telling you that you're the best thing ever? What do you say to those people?"
"Thank you." I guess. How weird would that be to go from someone who works whatever joe-job to traveling around the country working book signings.
I bet you could easily make Jonathan Safron Foer laugh, he hasn't been through a bunch of signing lines... but David Sedaris. He's written what, five, six books now? AND he's funny himself... he know's what's funny, and what isn't.
I work with people who are in comedy troupes, people who are actors, people who are writers, directors, and other things that might sound impressive. Whenever they get together, they go nuts, nuts I say trying to be the craziest, funniest son of a bitch out there. I don't try and keep up, I just sit back and enjoy the show, on occasion, I'll make a comment and get a chuckle... but there's a lot of pressure on people who are thought of as the funny one.
All this passed through my head... and here's finally what happened...
DAVID: Hi, who's Jeff?
(I had written my name on a sticky note prior, so he could write my name in the book... to save more time, they should just have me write my own name and inscription in the book, and then the author could just sign the note, then the signature takes on a dual meaning- 1)an autograph, and 2)I approve of what you wrote.)
JEFF: That's me.
DAVID: And what do you do here in town?
JEFF:I work in a book store. Half Price Books. We sell books for half price.
DAVID: And what's the store called?
JEFF: Half Price Books.
DAVID: Oh, that makes sense.
and I walked off. I could have asked him a question about his friends, Sarah Vowell, or Dave Eggers, both of whose books I enjoy, but no, I just went and sat down and waited for him to tell a few funny stories, then I went home, with my signed book which now sits on my bookshelf. Not a bad night overall.
I don't write in this much anymore, and my friends have been giving me hell. They call me and say, "why don't you write in your journal anymore?" To which my reply is, "What do you want to know? I can tell you right now."
I really haven't had much to talk about really... but I'll give it a try, for old times sake.
One of my joys is reading things written by David Sedaris, he makes me laugh. I was able to see him do a reading about a year ago, and he signed some books afterward, but like an idiot I forgot to bring my book, and even if I did, I wasn't crazy about the line that wrapped up the grand spiraling staircase in they Morton Myerson Center in Dallas, TX. So, I have no signed David Sedaris book... I HAD no signed David Sedaris book. Mr. Sedaris was kind enough to stop back by the Dallas area this past week and do a mini-reading at a Borders books. His signing took place at seven in the evening, I got off work at five in the evening- and drove staight over to the Borders, it took me twenty minutes or so to get there, and there were still a good thirty people in front of me, and very quickly thirty plus people found themselves behind me.
Unfortunately I found myself there by myself, whereas most people came in groups, and they were chatty people.
"I love David Sedaris. I'm his biggest fan. I've read Me Talk Pretty One Day nine hundred times."
"I went to New York to see David Sedaris. Well, I didn't actually get to see him there, but..."
"Have you ever read Chuck Palahniuk? He's my favorite. He wrote Fight Club. Best movie ever."
"I just got done reading this erotic novel."
Meahwhile I'm thinking, "WHOA! Do I tell you every thought that passes through my head? No. No I don't. Do you know why? Because you're a stranger, and I don't need strangers hating me. You know how I feel about you right now?"
Then, while waiting in line, something else occurred to me. I'm waiting in line to meet David Sedaris. What the hell am I going to say to David Sedaris. He's a funny guy. I'm a funny guy, or at least that's what my friends say, but here's the thing. It's a book tour. All over America, in Borders, and other book stores all over America people wait in line, people think to themselves, "I'm going to say something funny, and I'm going to make David Sedaris laugh." This maybe a bit post modern- but there's only so much funny in the world. How many people have said, "Hey sign mine to the Rooster?" or something along those lines?
About a month ago, some friends and I went to see Jonathan Safron Foer, author of Everything is Illuminated and Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close at a book signing at the Dallas Museum of Art. He's a relatively young guy, younger than me... and this would be his second book tour. My thought while watching him sign books is, "How do you go from sitting behind your desk, straining, sweating, spitting, and trying to write something that's worth a damn. How do you go through all that self doubt, to thinking, maybe, just maybe you've written something worth wild- to sitting behind a desk, signing copies of a book you wrote, looking at the fifty, sixty, one hundred people in line telling you that you're the best thing ever? What do you say to those people?"
"Thank you." I guess. How weird would that be to go from someone who works whatever joe-job to traveling around the country working book signings.
I bet you could easily make Jonathan Safron Foer laugh, he hasn't been through a bunch of signing lines... but David Sedaris. He's written what, five, six books now? AND he's funny himself... he know's what's funny, and what isn't.
I work with people who are in comedy troupes, people who are actors, people who are writers, directors, and other things that might sound impressive. Whenever they get together, they go nuts, nuts I say trying to be the craziest, funniest son of a bitch out there. I don't try and keep up, I just sit back and enjoy the show, on occasion, I'll make a comment and get a chuckle... but there's a lot of pressure on people who are thought of as the funny one.
All this passed through my head... and here's finally what happened...
DAVID: Hi, who's Jeff?
(I had written my name on a sticky note prior, so he could write my name in the book... to save more time, they should just have me write my own name and inscription in the book, and then the author could just sign the note, then the signature takes on a dual meaning- 1)an autograph, and 2)I approve of what you wrote.)
JEFF: That's me.
DAVID: And what do you do here in town?
JEFF:I work in a book store. Half Price Books. We sell books for half price.
DAVID: And what's the store called?
JEFF: Half Price Books.
DAVID: Oh, that makes sense.
and I walked off. I could have asked him a question about his friends, Sarah Vowell, or Dave Eggers, both of whose books I enjoy, but no, I just went and sat down and waited for him to tell a few funny stories, then I went home, with my signed book which now sits on my bookshelf. Not a bad night overall.