This Week in Television...
PREVIOUSLY ON...
UGLY BETTY: Daniel and Betty have fun traipsing around New York, until Daniel's brother Alex returns to the dead as a transexual, an eX-Man, a chick, MYSTIQUE. THAT'S RIGHT. DUDE LOOKS LIKE A LADY.
SCRUBS: People sang songs about poo.
BATTLESTAR GALACTICA: Helo proves, once and for all, that he is the BEST BOYFRIEND EVER, by shooting Athena dead and crying, crying, crying (I belive this is the second time he has done this.) Xena gets boxed, Boomer goes nuts, the baby has a hard tummy, and the whole place goes kaboom. Gaius gets pistol whipped. Then, there's something sketch about Starbuck's psychic paintings...
ROME: Cleopatra shows up and Atia declares her a pig-spawned trollop. After a bitchfight with Marc Antony, Octavian runs away. Pullo gently and bromantically shaves Vorenus, who smashes stuff, declares himself a son of Hades, and is all "I FUCK CONCORD. IN THE ASS!!!" Also, since Romans were funny, a mysterious boy offers to fellate Atia's butler.
HEROES: There was a great dinosaur cop out, Hiro robbed a museum, Cheerleader got her non-gay best friend back, Pretty Petrelli un-coma'ed himself and got choked by Dr. Who, DID and psych wards are creepy, and how do you stop an exploding man?
VERONICA MARS: A monkey is on the loose, which some how results in Mac macking with a guy who isn't a serial bus-blowing killer. Piz develops as a cute character, while Logan surfs and makes frowny faces. In the end, ampersand is saved, Veronica snogs Logan, and someone used Veronica's term paper to kill the Dean. Metaphorically speaking.
TRAILERS:
NEXT WEEK ON VERONICA MARS: Logan is a whore. A big big angsty woobie whore. And there are hookers! Oh, and Logan is frowny. Again.
NEXT WEEK ON BATTLESTAR GALACTICA: Anders wants Starbuck to leave him and go to Apollo so he will be happy, because Starbuck will be happy. Starbuck wants Apollo to leave Dee and go to Starbuck so she will be happy, because Apollo will be happy. Yay, everyone will be happy! Except. Oh. Wait. Maybe this is unfair to Dee. Somewhere, Billy Keikeya is crying.
300: SPARTA!!!! We are going to throw you into a pit. Why? Because we are SPARTA!!! The Persian Army rises up against us. SPAAARRRRRRTAAAAA!!! Fancy music and loinclothes and special effects and SPARRRRRTAAAA!!! At the end of this trailer you begin to suspect that this film might just have something to do with, eh, perhaps Sparta?
As opposed to Athens.
Or Athena. Who has the BEST. BOYFRIEND. EVER. I mean, srsly. ♥HELO.
UGLY BETTY: Daniel and Betty have fun traipsing around New York, until Daniel's brother Alex returns to the dead as a transexual, an eX-Man, a chick, MYSTIQUE. THAT'S RIGHT. DUDE LOOKS LIKE A LADY.
SCRUBS: People sang songs about poo.
BATTLESTAR GALACTICA: Helo proves, once and for all, that he is the BEST BOYFRIEND EVER, by shooting Athena dead and crying, crying, crying (I belive this is the second time he has done this.) Xena gets boxed, Boomer goes nuts, the baby has a hard tummy, and the whole place goes kaboom. Gaius gets pistol whipped. Then, there's something sketch about Starbuck's psychic paintings...
ROME: Cleopatra shows up and Atia declares her a pig-spawned trollop. After a bitchfight with Marc Antony, Octavian runs away. Pullo gently and bromantically shaves Vorenus, who smashes stuff, declares himself a son of Hades, and is all "I FUCK CONCORD. IN THE ASS!!!" Also, since Romans were funny, a mysterious boy offers to fellate Atia's butler.
HEROES: There was a great dinosaur cop out, Hiro robbed a museum, Cheerleader got her non-gay best friend back, Pretty Petrelli un-coma'ed himself and got choked by Dr. Who, DID and psych wards are creepy, and how do you stop an exploding man?
VERONICA MARS: A monkey is on the loose, which some how results in Mac macking with a guy who isn't a serial bus-blowing killer. Piz develops as a cute character, while Logan surfs and makes frowny faces. In the end, ampersand is saved, Veronica snogs Logan, and someone used Veronica's term paper to kill the Dean. Metaphorically speaking.
TRAILERS:
NEXT WEEK ON VERONICA MARS: Logan is a whore. A big big angsty woobie whore. And there are hookers! Oh, and Logan is frowny. Again.
NEXT WEEK ON BATTLESTAR GALACTICA: Anders wants Starbuck to leave him and go to Apollo so he will be happy, because Starbuck will be happy. Starbuck wants Apollo to leave Dee and go to Starbuck so she will be happy, because Apollo will be happy. Yay, everyone will be happy! Except. Oh. Wait. Maybe this is unfair to Dee. Somewhere, Billy Keikeya is crying.
300: SPARTA!!!! We are going to throw you into a pit. Why? Because we are SPARTA!!! The Persian Army rises up against us. SPAAARRRRRRTAAAAA!!! Fancy music and loinclothes and special effects and SPARRRRRTAAAA!!! At the end of this trailer you begin to suspect that this film might just have something to do with, eh, perhaps Sparta?
As opposed to Athens.
Or Athena. Who has the BEST. BOYFRIEND. EVER. I mean, srsly. ♥HELO.