Feminism vs Oppression

[jeanniecee]

I consider myself a feminist. I feel that women haven't had equal rights and feel that we still don't in some ways and I think that should change. I think that the power structures that exist in our society are harmful in a lot of ways.

But to me, being a feminist does not mean I can be a bully in my relationship.

The other night I was out at a

Comments

[jack_rowen]

I've had this problem for awhile when speaking with girls that I know. Or sitting at a table and hearing women speak about what "let" their men do and don't do. It's all in an attempt to control the relationship to fit their needs and quell their insecurities. Men are guilty of it as well, but it always surprises me when I see more and more women doing the exact same thing.

It's like the Trust Argument. I hear this argument all the time too.

Woman: "Honey it's not that I don't trust you, it's that I don't trust HER."

Men: "Um, oh. Okay baby."

I hear girls using this argument more than men and it's frustrating when the guys can't see the manipulation behind it.

If she fully and wholly trusted you, then it wouldn't matter what kind of girls you hung around because she knows you won't do anything. So, yeah, she probably doesn't trust the other girl but she doesn't trust you either. Short of slipping him a Rufie, there isn't much a small girl could do in order to force him to have sex.

"Honey, I don't want you hanging out with (insert-name)."

"Honey, I don't like when you go to that Bar."

"Honey, I don't want you driving that way."

It's like their speaking to a child. It's disrespectful and silly. It's wrong to try and make someone do what you want them to do. It's as if nowadays the goal of getting married is to snag someone and mold them into your ideal partner, no matter how much it's screwing with their psyche.

And what's even more messed up, is that because I think this way, I'm considered "difficult" by my fellow sisterhood.

I salute you for this post! XD

[jeanniecee]

Thanks for your reply. I agree with you totally. I've had people tell my I have no self respect because I trust my partner enough to go over to other women's houses _unsupervised_! *shock horror* I was so angry when I was told this. I trust my partner. I know that he tells me the truth. I don't want to change who he is any more than I want him to change who I am. Feminism does not mean that women are better than men, it's supposed to be about equality, not women telling men what to do because they are bad or stupid or untrustworthy.