Light....
After, much thought & reading , I now understand there there has to be a basic reason for my need to escape. I kept thinking it was some big dark secret.... but for some reason or several I now know what I need to escape.... STRESS. Now a few of my friends might say they have already suggested that, but apparently I wasn't listening. When self medication with smoke & wine weren't enough, I got high blood pressure to deal with. Guess what causes high blood pressure... STRESS. The reduction of stress is to meditate or the opposite of stress. Fish oil is recommended for high blood pressure as well. So is reduced alcohol. I know this all sounds simplistic, but I see so much of my life under the umbrella of stress now. This is something I can work on, I have but not knowing how bad it is for me.