Chocolate Fic for helenmaldon, Part 2
To: helenmaldon
From: cupid_johnny
Title: Turn Your Heart Around Towards Me
Pairing: Ohno Satoshi/Kanjiya Shihori; in the background, Matsumoto Jun/Inoue Mao
Rating: NC-17 (Real Talk: it’s 97% PG-13 but you know how it is…)
Summary: Some people had “the one who got away.” Shihori’s experience had differed. She’d been the one to get away, and he hadn’t lifted a finger to stop her.
A/N: Hello there, helenmaldon, it was a pleasure to write for you! I saw that you’re a Jane Austen fan, and once I knew Ohno was going to be my protagonist, my initial goal was to rewrite Persuasion for you. Didn’t quite happen, but I had a blast putting everyone’s beloved, curmudgeonly “old man” into a romance nonetheless. There’s no navy captain stuff, no meddling relatives. Instead I decided to just follow the heart of what makes Persuasion so compelling to me: the idea of getting a second chance at love. The title is from Ohno’s solo, Two.
It was unlike Nino to spend the entire workday avoiding him, but he’d only come by to do a cursory check of the fishing zone before hurrying away. After the women had left the night before, Nino had told Ohno to put his wallet away, had paid for the entire bill at Peking Duck instead of offering an actual apology.
What had happened was just so dumb. Everything had been going fine, everyone had been chatting, the food had been good. And then Ohno had just blurted out his unsolicited assistance and ruined everything. As he stared at the rows of merchandise, looked out across the open store to the golf area, all he could see was her.
She had always been pretty, but she was more grown-up now. When they’d broken up, she’d only been about 22, 23 years old. With a round girlish face, with an easy, cheerful smile. The woman he’d sat with the night before was more cautious, with a slightly sharper edge. Maybe it came from teaching, dealing with teenagers all day, but there was a wariness in her eyes now. Maybe it came from him. Maybe he’d made her that way.
“Do you have any more of the Chico crankbaits?” someone asked. Ohno blinked himself out of his guilt, turning to address the customer behind him.
“You get that from the end of the aisle here?”
“Yeah,” the guy said, holding up the package. “Where are the rest?”
“Right this way. We’ve got a buy two, get one free promotion on the Chico line right now.”
He focused on helping the customer, probably going above and beyond to explain what they had in stock. The customer didn’t seem to mind at least. But once he’d made his purchase, the fishing zone was quiet again, leaving Ohno kicking himself for all the things he’d managed to screw up in so short a time.
It was Nino’s fault too, but maybe it was Ohno’s fault for not saying anything. Ohno’s fault for not going “you know I haven’t seen her in seven years, and the last time I did, I broke her heart. Tread lightly.”
The wedding reception was tomorrow evening. All he had to do was pick up the tux rental in the morning, show up for a few hours, and wish Jun and Mao well. Then Shihori and Keiko would leave Sunday or Monday, back to their lives in Tokyo. He could get through it. He could do that much couldn’t he? The answer to that was “no” the more hours passed that day. The last thing he needed to do was make things worse, especially on a day that wasn’t about him at all.
He was working until closing that night, and he still had five hours to go. They usually had better crowds, but it had been pouring rain on and off since the morning. He wasn’t looking forward to standing at the bus stop later that night, seeing as how he’d forgotten his umbrella. He supposed he could always buy one from the store if it got really bad out there. He could imagine Jun standing in the Hug Diner right now, staring defiantly out the front window and commanding the rain to stop.
Ohno had known Mao-chan as one of Shihori’s friends, but Jun’s friendship had come a little later. He and Ohno had very little in common. Jun was all about action, about continual improvement, whether it was some new menu item or training for a 10K. He was persistent in maintaining their friendship, inviting Ohno out for drinks or asking him to grab a date and join him and Mao for a night out in Nagoya. Ohno considered himself a Hug Diner customer before anything else, but Jun and Mao always laughed when he said as much.
He was happy for them, but he didn’t dare diminish any aspect of their perfect day. And besides, people expected that from him, didn’t they? They expected him to be stubborn, to go his own way. To decide something on a whim and refuse to budge. That was how he found himself dialing Jun’s cell number in the break room a few hours before closing, after Nino had already gone home.
Jun was incredibly frazzled upon answering, was apparently wrapping up the rehearsal dinner with the parents and his future in-laws early on account of the weather. “I’m sorry to bother you, Matsumoto-kun,” Ohno said, staring at the break room vending machine.
“It’s not a bother,” Jun replied, although he was a really terrible liar. “Is something wrong?”
“I’m not going to be able to make it tomorrow,” he said, hoping he sounded calm. “Something’s come up last minute.”
“Is everything okay? Has something happened? I remember you telling me your father wasn’t feeling well a few weeks back, is he okay?”
“No, no, he’s fine.” His dad had only had a nasty bout of acid reflux. “It’s just…I won’t be able to come.”
“If the weather’s keeping you from getting to the venue, I already told you we’ve got a shuttle service hired that can come get you…”
“Sorry to cause you trouble. I do have a gift. I’ll bring it to you at the diner when you get back from the honeymoon…”
“Ohno-san,” Jun interrupted. “Ohno-san, wait a moment…”
He hung up, feeling like complete shit. He turned off his phone too. There, now the day could go ahead without a hitch.
By now he was the most senior employee in the store, and as the rain picked up, the wind howling outside the windows, he started sending people home. They had maybe a handful of customers in the entire place by 8:00, and he decided to close up early. He made an announcement over the public address system, telling everyone to please get home safely.
By 8:30 he was ready for final checks, listening to the rain splatter against the building, hammering the roof in an unrelenting fashion. Not quite the typhoon Jun had been dreading, but still a nasty storm. He walked the ground floor, double checking the changing rooms, in between the aisles to make sure everyone had gone. He moved through athletic apparel, through shoes, through exercise machines before taking his key and shutting the escalators down for the night.
He jogged upstairs, doing final checks of the fishing zone, camping, outdoor apparel, golf. There was a crash of thunder and the overhead lights flickered, making him jump. They were on a timer, would go off on their own after Ohno locked the place up and waited in the rain for the bus. Well, he hoped the buses were still running. He’d have to put his phone back on and check, would have to call a cab if he was out of luck.
He headed back downstairs, just in time to hear knocking. Hurrying toward the front doors of the store that he’d already locked, he could see someone was outside hitting them. Maybe it was Kaede-chan, one of the cashiers. She was always forgetting her phone in the break room.
There was another clap of thunder, followed up by lightning a few seconds later. He got the doors opened, and the person hurried inside with a squeak of galoshes on the floor. She was wearing a rain poncho, bright green, and when she pulled the hood down, Ohno was surprised. It wasn’t Kaede.
“Shii-chan,” he said, gaping at her for a few seconds, watching the rain slide down her face, trickle down the sleeves of her poncho. “I should…I should close the door.”
He got it shut again, the wind proving itself a force to contend with. He turned, seeing Shihori standing there soaking wet on the Everything Outdoor logo on the floor of the entryway.
“What are you doing here? How did you get here?”
“Kei-chan’s car,” she said, her galoshes still squeaking on the linoleum.
There was more thunder, more lightning, and he stared at her. “You drove here in the rain? That’s dangerous.”
Her hair was probably the driest thing about her, tied up in a messy bun, and she wiped water from her face with the palm of her hand. “Yeah, it probably was.” She stood her ground. “Mao-chan texted me and Keiko, said you weren’t coming tomorrow. She was very worried. Are you okay?”
She drove all the way to the store in a thunderstorm to ask him that?
“They tried to call you but you didn’t answer,” she continued. “So I was worried it might have something to do with me. Keiko didn’t want me to come, but after last night and you having to pay for our drinks and everything, I thought that maybe you were angry, and you have no right to take it out on Mao and Jun so…”
“I’m not angry,” he interrupted, but she kept going.
“You were invited the same as me, and you should go. I don’t want things to be weird, and it’s just a wedding, you know? So I think it’s perfectly easy for us to coexist in the same room for a few hours. It’s been seven years after all. And it’s silly for us to behave this way when we’re both adults, so will you please come tomorrow?”
She was completely serious, pleading with him to change his mind. She’d come all this way, against her friend’s advice, against all common sense given how awful the weather was. He saw hints of her, that girl he’d fallen in love with. The one who knew how stubborn he could be. Despite their history, despite everything he’d done, she wanted to put Jun and Mao’s feelings first, even if it meant having to see him.
He’d always felt that no matter how terribly he’d gone about it, he’d made the right call in allowing her to walk away, to pursue her career and a life away from him. For the first time, after seven long years convincing himself that it had all been for the best, letting her go, he felt regret. She owed him nothing, but here she was. He missed her. He’d never admitted it before but damn it, he missed her so badly.
He kept all of those thoughts to himself for now. Instead he pointed at her. “You’re going to catch a cold.”
She looked aside for a moment. “I told myself I’d come here and say what I wanted to say. And I have. So I’ll just go home and curl up with some tea…”
“No!” he said, surprising himself with how emphatic he was. “I mean, at least wait until the rain slows down a bit. I can’t let you go back out in that.”
She looked around the store nervously. “I thought you were still open…”
“I sent everybody home. I was just closing up to go home myself. But I’m not going to let you drive in this storm.”
“That could take hours!” she protested. “I looked at the hour-by-hour forecast and there were those little cartoony umbrellas for the next twelve hours at least!”
He took a deep breath, watching the puddle grow at her feet. “If I agree to go to the wedding tomorrow, will you just listen to me? It’s safer for you in here than out there. You know the roads get washed out sometimes around here.”
She thought about it a moment. She’d probably acted impulsively, not realizing how bad it was until she was already halfway to see him. And now here she was, having expected Everything Outdoor to still be open, not closed early with him the only person on premises. She probably didn’t want to spend any more time with him than was necessary. And he couldn’t blame her for that. But her safety was what made Ohno so insistent. Not just the realization that he missed her.
“Let me call Keiko,” she said, yanking awkwardly at the bottom of her poncho to pull her cell phone from the pocket of her jeans. “If I’m staying here for however long, the buses will stop running, you know.”
“I don’t care.”
She typed in her phone password, unlocked it. “Well I’ll give you a ride home when you decide it’s safe again, Mr. Weather Advisor.”
He grinned, remembering how much she’d always teased him. It felt good, maybe too good, to hear it from her again. He moved away, ensuring the front door was locked as he gave her some privacy to call up Keiko. He stared out the front door glass, seeing the small hatchback parked in the lot all by its lonesome. Kanjiya Shihori, he thought with a bitter grin, why’d you have to come back?
-
The poncho and galoshes she’d borrowed from Keiko’s mother had been somewhat helpful, but they were now laid out to dry on the floor of Everything Outdoor. Much as Keiko had been annoyed with her for wanting to see him, she’d been too insistent to let her friend change her mind. Mao, who had always been a calm and laid-back sort of person, had contacted them in a panic. “Is something wrong with Ohno-san? Is he okay? Have we offended him in some way?”
No, Shihori had wanted to message her back, no he’s just being as pigheaded as ever, probably thinking he was sidestepping drama by ditching the wedding. But because Ohno Satoshi had the world’s worst sense of timing, his abrupt last minute cancellation had Mao and Jun worried that there’d been a death in his family or something else quite serious. In attempting to not cause drama, Ohno had created more. The idiot.
And now she was stuck here, because much as she didn’t want to admit it, it had been a terrifying drive up the coastal highway to the store. Waves had been crashing high enough to almost reach the barriers on the side of the road, and if they got washed out, there was no way Keiko’s small car would get through any flooding. So against her better judgment, she would be here alone in Everything Outdoor with Ohno until the storm calmed down.
She was now in stocking feet, her jeans soaked from the knees down because of the blowing rain and the poncho flapping around when she ran from the parking lot to the door. She’d been equally dumb in only wearing a t-shirt, and she was freezing. Ohno seemed to realize this as soon as she’d hung up the phone and discarded the soaking poncho and galoshes.
“You need to change clothes,” he said. “Seriously.”
Thankfully she was too teeth-chatteringly cold to worry about blushing from his words. It was an outdoor store, luckily enough. One of the best places to be stuck for a few hours. He left her alone, letting her peruse the athletic wear section for something to change into. He’d even whipped out the “Suave and Confident Ohno” voice she remembered from so many years ago, telling her “get whatever you want, I’ll pay for it. Just hand me the tags, and I’ll scan them at the register.”
Free merchandise, courtesy Everything Outdoor. She was tempted to grab a really expensive pair of yoga pants made with the newest, fanciest microfibers, but she was the dummy who’d taken on a storm and driven up here. He was just being nice to her when he could have just directed her to the employee break room to let her put on stuff from the lost and found bin.
She opted for some thermal pants, a long-sleeved top, and a zip-up fleece, bringing her merchandise to him diligently. He still had that pocket knife on him, the one he’d used all those years ago on their lighthouse lock, using it to cut the tags off for her. If he was thinking about that day, he certainly didn’t look like he was. He probably used that pocket knife for everything, and he’d never had a memory for little moments like that.
She took the clothes to the empty dressing room, and it was rather creepy being in there alone at night. Whenever she’d closed out the store when she worked here, there was always someone else around, or they’d turn up the music over the store’s sound system. It was different tonight with the rain playing its relentless drum beat against the roof, the mirrors reflecting her lonely image and waterlogged jeans.
Shihori dressed quickly, using some of the hangers in the changing room to hang up her wet clothes. Maybe if she got bored she’d go to the women’s restroom, use the blow dryers on her jeans. For now she just came out of the room and back into the empty, cavernous store, feeling a lot more comfortable now in her pink fleece and warm pants.
She found him at the register, adding the receipt he’d just printed out to the cash drawer. “I’m just going to lock this back up and I’ll be right back.” He couldn’t help grinning at her. “If you want to use any of the exercise bikes, I can set that up for you.”
“I didn’t plan on exercising, thank you. I’m technically on vacation, you know.”
“Suit yourself!”
It was so weird being in this huge place all alone. The lights were still on, so there weren’t an abundance of shadows keeping things hidden and scary. There was that “store smell” she remembered so fiercely, even though she hadn’t been through the door in years. Racks and racks of lycra, baseball team t-shirts, the upper floor with golf clubs and fishing rods. Shihori still didn’t like to fish, and she remembered that she’d only started having feelings for Ohno once she’d gotten herself transferred over to shoes, spending her days on the ground floor, not seeing him any longer except during breaks or at the end of a shift.
The memory ached, and being in the store made it all the more real. She took any shift she could get, any bit of money helping with her school expenses. No matter how tired she’d get juggling work, school, the commute back and forth from Nagoya, it had been worth it. She’d be there in the evening just after they closed, re-boxing sneakers and soccer cleats that customers had put back in the wrong place, and she’d see him coming down the escalator, staring into space. But then he’d come by, pick up one of the display shoes, and tap her on the shoulder with it.
“Hey, shoe girl.”
She’d been the one to ask him out, albeit in a roundabout way. A movie, she’d asked him to a movie, and when it was over he’d been brutally honest. “That was terrible,” he’d said, crinkling his nose and making her heart sink. But then he’d been the one to say “I’ll pick the movie next time.” The rest was history. Ancient history, Shihori tried to remind herself as she slowly walked up and down the aisles.
A jolt of thunder shook the entire store, making her jump, letting out a tiny squeal in panic. The storm was getting closer. She was safe here, she reminded herself. Hell, the rest of Japan could wash away and she was in the best place to survive. They had enough beef jerky and protein powder under the roof to last out the apocalypse. They’d joked about it back then, making it their plan for the end of the world. “I’ll meet you at the store,” he’d say. “When the zombies come.”
Well, there were no zombies tonight, and she doubted Japan was going to disappear overnight. But there was something kind of final about walking these aisles after so many years, asking him to attend the wedding, getting through the weekend, and then getting back to her life. Keiko had said it might be a good idea to see him, to find closure in it. To allow herself to finally move on.
She must have been wandering around for half an hour at least when she found him on an elliptical machine, arms balanced against the display panel, his legs swinging back and forth aimlessly. Whoosh, whoosh, whoosh, back and forth. He’d ditched the employee vest, was down to the white polo tee, khakis, and sneakers. He hadn’t noticed her yet, and she couldn’t help watching. Saying a silent goodbye to the guy who still worked here, who probably hadn’t changed at all from the day she’d left him behind. He was still endearingly cute, much as she was embarrassed to admit it.
As always, his face was at complete peace. Over the years, she’d learned that Ohno Satoshi was a 50/50 guy. Fifty percent of the time, when he was showing that peaceful expression - eyes glazed over, mouth occasionally quirking from side to side - he wasn’t thinking anything at all. He could just disappear, let the seconds go by, lost in absolutely nothing. But then the other fifty percent of the time he was thinking about something incredibly intently. The lures he was going to pack for his next deep sea excursion with friends on a charter tour. One of the sketches he’d started and hadn’t finished.
She wondered which fifty percent was in action right now.
“Shall we check how it looks outside?” she asked, and his legs slowed their movements.
With another timely crack of thunder, he laughed. “It sounds like it’s getting worse, not better.”
She pulled her phone from her back pocket - 9:52 PM.
“It’s almost 10:00!” She leaned against one of the other machines, frowning. “It’ll be better if you’re with me in the car, you can help me navigate. We can’t be here forever!”
He shook his head. “Not safe, especially after dark. I know for a fact that Keiko would kill me if I let something happen to you. Her dad’s a doctor, right? She’d probably inject me with something…”
Shihori didn’t bother rushing to defend her friend’s honor and inability to commit murder. Keiko was the best friend a girl could ask for, but she was fairly certain that Keiko would demand she stay and wait out the storm for her own safety. Even if it meant being stuck with Oh-chan even longer.
“Did you eat anything?” she asked him. “Anything proper, I mean. For dinner?”
He shrugged. “I had a cereal bar during my last break.”
A grown man, and he still half-assed things like this. “Well, if we’re stuck here, Ohno-san, we should probably eat something.”
She was astonished by the hurt look she saw register on his face as soon as she’d called him ‘Ohno-san’. What else was she supposed to call him though? He recovered quickly enough, hopping down from the machine. They were heading for the break room and Ohno’s promise of some leftovers in the employees’ shared fridge when the lights went out.
-
He’d forgotten about the timer for the lights, so when they went out all of a sudden, he was confused. This confusion only lasted a second or so because then she was fumbling for him in the dark. “Oh-chan,” she was saying, and he kind of hated how much he liked hearing it again. “Oh-chan?”
“I’m here,” he said. He couldn’t help holding out his hand, waiting for her to find it. “I’m right here. The main lights are on a timer, they always go out at 10:00, I’m sorry for forgetting to tell you. But the backups will come on, remember? It’ll be a minute before they fully light.”
They weren’t standing that far apart, but she’d always been more of a scaredy cat than she ever let on. She’d gone to scary movies with him, back then, and even though he could usually tell when something was going to happen, she never could. He remembered how good it had felt, some bloody scene or scary moment frightening her into clinging to him, her head butting against his shoulder as she tried to hide her eyes.
“Tell me when it’s over, Oh-chan. I don’t know why I see these things with you,” she’d always said, and he remembered how her fingers had closed tightly around his arm. He’d never been the princely type, but still she’d sought him out to comfort and calm her.
It was that same tone in her voice, that “Oh-chan” that sounded just the same all these years later when she finally found his fingers with her own. Instead of holding onto his hand though, she settled for twisting her fingers in the sleeve of his polo shirt. As the backup lights came on, he realized there was not going to be much visibility. There was one light in each section that glowed faintly, the lights over the exits, and not much else.
“I could go change the timer…”
“Won’t you get in trouble? You’re not even supposed to be here now, are you?” she asked, and he could feel her relax as she grew used to the darkness. He missed the closeness, the faint warmth of her as she let go of his shirt and took a step back.
With more thunder and lightning punctuating her words, he was at a loss for what to do with her. They definitely couldn’t drive out of here yet, but now the lights were off. “Maybe we should sleep,” he suggested, scratching an itch on the inside of his nose, happy she couldn’t see him do it. “Got the wedding tomorrow and you have to get back. Well, we both do.”
“Sleep?” she asked, sounding more annoyed than nervous now. “Sleep here in the store?”
“Weather’s not letting up, it’s after 10:00, what’s the harm?” He finished with his nose itching. “I mean, this is an outdoor store, remember? We’ve got sleeping bags. All the comforts of home. And beef jerky.” He chuckled quietly. “I remember, that big plan of ours, when we were planning to wait out the zombies here and…”
“Don’t,” she said quickly, and he felt like a jerk. He’d spent the last few days reliving the past, their past, the one they’d had together. Maybe she wasn’t terribly interested in thinking back to those days. For him, there was no real harm in remembering the good times. There’d been many of them, at least in his mind. But for her, obviously, all she could focus on was what he’d done. Or honestly, what he hadn’t done at all.
He shoved down his nostalgia, the happier memories they’d shared. Too little, too late, you idiot, he chided himself. “Well, come on. Nino comes to open the store around 8:30, so we’ll have to be out by then.”
She pulled her phone from her pocket, and soon there was a bluish glow lighting up her face. It was a little ghoulish, seeing her in the phone’s glow. “My battery won’t last too long. But we should set an alarm.”
This much he could do for her. “Let’s get you settled, and I’ll take care of the rest.”
Half an hour later, after a walk up the unmoving escalator, he’d upgraded Shihori from a simple sleeping bag to the six-person camping tent model they kept out on display in the middle of the camping zone year-round. Within, her cell phone was now connected to the store’s largest extension cord and plugged in to an outlet 20 feet away. Her alarm set for 7:00 AM, she had arranged herself atop a mound of sleeping bags and looked, to Ohno’s thinking, a bit like a queen in luxurious accommodations. Beside her sleeping area, there was the battery-powered camp light he’d set up, providing much better lighting than her phone screen or the emergency store lights.
He was just returning with a packet of beef jerky, tapping on the outside of the tent. “It’s me.”
She unzipped the tent entrance fully, laughing at him. “Who else would it be?”
He shrugged, thrusting the bag of jerky at her. “Here you go. There’s Gatorade, if you want Gatorade.”
“I’ve got the water you already brought,” she said, taking the bag. Her voice was a little quieter when she said “thank you.”
He hesitated, seeing that she’d taken off the fleece he’d paid for, had let her hair down so she could sleep. There was a soft little strand that had fallen a little out of place. A sudden urge to reach for it, to push it back where it belonged, nearly overwhelmed him. He wouldn’t do it, he couldn’t do it, but a memory hit hard.
He usually preferred falling asleep on his couch in his apartment, the glow of the TV lulling him into his dreams. Sometimes when she used to stay the night, he’d let her have the whole bed, but by the middle of the night she’d crawl onto the couch with him. He remembered that he usually couldn’t fall back asleep without stroking his fingers through her hair. Those moments, in the haze before he fell asleep, were the moments he’d loved her most. Having her close, keeping her safe in his arms, never wanting her to leave…
It took all his willpower to keep his hands to himself. He looked away from the temptation of her hair. What a creep he was being. If he’d really never wanted her to leave, he should have said something. Long ago. “I’ll stay out here, I’m not too tired yet.”
“Okay,” she said, and he could hear the rustling of the jerky pack in her hands. “Good night.”
“Sweet dreams.”
She zipped the tent back up, and because of the camp light he could see the outline of her sitting inside, opening the jerky pack. To give her some privacy to eat and settle in, he busied himself with unrolling a sleeping bag on the carpeted area of the camping zone, setting himself up near the aisle of canteens and camp stoves nearby. After that was complete, he decided it was best to walk off what he was feeling, to think of something, of anything that wasn’t the girl he’d loved and lost being here in the store with him alone.
He left camping, headed for golf, letting the dim lights and his own familiarity with the store’s layout guide him along. It was usually so easy to just switch off, to lose himself in nothing or in his hobbies. He tried to focus on the rhythm of the rain, trying to think rationally. He was happy to see her, and he was obviously still physically attracted to her, that was all there was to it. It had been almost a year since he’d even dated anyone more than a handful of times. Maybe he was just lonely, he decided. She’d go back to Tokyo, and this would just be an isolated incident.
He was poking at golf shoes now, increasingly distracted by the thought of her in that tent by herself, unzipping it and beckoning to him. “Oh-chan,” she’d say, “this is a six-person tent, just come in here already.” He sighed in exasperation, feeling himself getting hard at the thought of it. What he needed to do was go downstairs and get on one of those exercise machines and tire himself out.
Instead he made a loop of the upper level of the store three times, losing his erection entirely once he started mentally reciting the SKU numbers for some of the merchandise in his section of the store. He only stopped when he came back around to the camping zone and saw that the light inside the tent was off. He didn’t need to make any further noise wandering around if she was trying to sleep.
Unlike the Korean soap operas he found himself watching at home when insomnia hit, there was no tent unzipping, no beckoning Shihori asking him to come in and keep her company. There was no dramatic swell of music as a long lost romance miraculously rekindled. Instead he took off his shoes and belt, getting into the sleeping bag several feet away from the tent. And that was it.
-
Shihori woke before her alarm, stirring around 6:30 with the need to use the bathroom. She had slept surprisingly well, given how nervous she was. Ohno had gone above and beyond what was necessary to keep her comfortable, and if anyone but Nino was his boss, he’d be getting in trouble for using store merchandise in this manner. She pulled on the fleece he’d bought her and unzipped the tent.
Padding out in her stocking feet, she couldn’t hear the rain and looked up to see sunshine pouring through the skylight at the top of the store. It was far less frightening now. As the beams of sunshine lit the clothing racks and aisles, it looked far friendlier than it had during the night. The store restrooms were on the ground floor, and she passed a lumpy red sleeping bag a little ways off from her tent. Oh-chan, still asleep.
She felt so much better once she used the washroom, rinsing her hands and face in the sink, using the water bottle he’d brought her last night to at least rinse her mouth out since she didn’t have a toothbrush. She’d had mornings like this before, sleeping over at a boyfriend’s house in the early stages before any of her own personal items were there. It was on a grander scale, doing so in a retail store. She checked herself out in the mirror, sliding her fingers through her hair a bit to feel a little more presentable.
She headed back upstairs, moving a little quickly because the steps of the motionless escalator were chilly on her socked feet. They had to get the store back to presentable before they left, before Nino arrived and tried to infer whether or not she and Ohno had used their time alone and slept together. The thought sent an uncomfortable sensation through her. Was that what Kei-chan had been so annoyed with her about, when Shihori had been so insistent on leaving last night? Had she thought Shihori had so little love for herself that she would throw herself at Oh-chan? He hadn’t even touched her, and he wasn’t the sort of person who’d ignore the past just to get laid in the present, was he?
Not that the idea hadn’t crossed her mind, sitting alone in that huge tent before giving in to sleep. He was still the Oh-chan who’d hurt her, but they were both different people now. Maybe when she got back to Tokyo she’d give dating a try again. It would certainly be healthier than dwelling on the strange night they’d just had together, wondering what might have happened if he’d been bolder, had unzipped the tent and asked to share the space with her.
Shihori made her way over to the red sleeping bag lump, feeling a little guilty that he’d slept out here all alone in a solitary sleeping bag when she’d been sleeping in comparative luxury. He was sleeping on his side, and she could see the vaguest outline of him within, his body curled up in an “S” shape. His head poked out the top, and her heart ached a little to see his sleeping face again after so many years apart. So peaceful, his little snores. Well, whatever, she told herself. They had tidying to do and a wedding to get through before this weekend could end.
She poked at him with her foot, seeing his eyes slowly open. He looked up at her in confusion first, a little slow in remembering exactly why she was there. “Good morning,” he finally said, holding up a hand to his eyes. “Ah, it’s bright.”
“A beautiful day for a wedding, I’m guessing.”
She watched him smile. “Matsumoto-kun will be much easier to deal with.”
Without much more prompting, Ohno got out of his sleeping bag, and though he told her she didn’t have to help, she insisted anyway. Together they packed up all the items they’d opened, setting them back. While they were doing so, Ohno allowed himself a rather wicked smile, informing her that he’d turned off the store cameras while she’d been changing the night before, simply so there’d be no record of them having spent the night in the store. Nino would just assume there’d been a malfunction, maybe a power short from the storm.
“That’s rather crafty of you,” Shihori said as they carried the opened box with the camp light to the Product Returns area in Guest Relations. “A dishonest employee would have stolen money or merchandise.”
“I’m extremely honest,” he said, taking an individually-wrapped piece of jerky from the bag she held out to him, opening it and biting into it eagerly. “Like, these cost 390 yen so I’ll just scan it and put cash in the drawer for it before we leave.”
“A paragon of virtuous behavior,” she replied, unable to keep from smiling. He’d always been a good person, an honest person. It was that brutal honesty, of course, that had broken them apart. But that was in the past, Shihori thought.
It had been so hard, coming to Minamichita. Even Thursday night at the Peking Duck had been so difficult, seeing Oh-chan again. But now, tidying up the store, he was so easy to talk to, as though things were fine between them. Maybe they were now. Maybe she really was moving on. She could go back to Tokyo a whole person, leaving Minamichita without heartbreak or regret.
Once the store was back in order, she gathered up the items she’d borrowed from Keiko’s mother, getting her own clothes from the changing room. Ohno gave her an Everything Outdoor bag to carry everything, and he locked the store down so Nino would arrive and be none the wiser. They got into Keiko’s car, and though the parking lot was dotted here and there with puddles, the rain had definitely stopped. The bright morning sunshine was a welcome sight.
She drove them back, and even though they drove through Mihama, home to the infamous lighthouse and their lock, Shihori didn’t feel too sad. Ohno was a quiet car companion, humming gently with the radio when a song he liked came on but otherwise not troubling her at all. He was peaceful to be with, the type of person who was soothing. Whenever she’d had a rough exam at university, all she’d ever needed was to go to him, to settle her head in his lap and let him stroke her hair without saying a word. A good memory. Not everything had to be sad where he was concerned now, right?
It was just after 8:00 when she pulled over into the parking area near his apartment building. She left the car running, putting it in park and looking over. He was pulling his house keys from the pocket of his work khakis. “Thank you,” she said. “You were right, making me stay. It would have been too dangerous to drive in that storm.”
He nodded in acknowledgment.
“Well,” she said, not knowing what else to say. “Thanks for your help, with the clothes and everything. I guess I’ll see you tonight.”
He exhaled heavily, and unlike his usual calm expression, the one he’d managed to wear all morning so far, he looked a little troubled when he turned to look at her. “Do you want something to eat? I could make some breakfast. Since you went to the trouble of driving me.”
The entire car ride, the entire morning, Shihori had been feeling confident, pleased that she’d been able to spend time with him and not go crazy or get lost in sad memories. It had been fine because he hadn’t done or said anything to imply that there was more to their little reunion than there really was. But now he was looking at her like he didn’t want her to go. And that was a dangerous road to venture down. There was no reason to go inside, to let him cook her a meal like he used to. She’d been on the verge of getting the clean, polite break she hadn’t gotten from him before. After the wedding, they would be out of each other’s lives for good.
Had she been reading his reticence wrong this entire time?
She hid her confused, strange feelings and gave him a smile instead. “Oh, no. Thank you, it’s no trouble, really. Kei-chan will probably be worried if I don’t get back. We’ll see you tonight, okay?”
His disappointment was readily apparent when he nodded in response. Just what did he want from her? And why now, after all this time? “I’ll see you then.”
Shihori was grateful that Keiko’s parents weren’t home when she returned. It was just Keiko, throwing together breakfast for them in the kitchen and giving her the third degree when she came in, wearing different clothes than she’d left in.
She told Keiko everything, save for the little awkward exchange in the car. “He was always so strange,” Keiko said, scooping rice out of the cooker for her. “But I suppose a more unscrupulous person would have tried to put the moves on you.”
“Huh?”
“Trapped in a storm, thrown together after so long. One of those overdramatic situations where common sense goes flying out the window.” Keiko sighed. “But again, you’re smarter than that and it’s not like he’s some romantic lead with smoldering good looks you can’t resist…”
“That’s enough, okay?” she grumbled, somehow overwhelmed with the need to defend Ohno. “Just because he’s not some teen idol…”
Keiko poured out some coffee into mugs, dropping the topic. After all, she’d been the one to think Shihori would be better off seeing him again in the first place. They turned to cheerier subjects while they ate, Bill coming down for his breakfast and to bump his head against Shihori’s shins in greeting. They enjoyed a lazy, leisurely morning and afternoon, curling up in front of the large TV in the Kitagawas’ living room with some DVDs while the cat snoozed.
Tearing themselves away was difficult later on, once it was time to get ready for the reception. They gossiped about other people from high school, taking turns with the curling iron and fussing over makeup, expressing their jealousy about Mao and Jun’s forthcoming honeymoon in Okinawa. Sunshine and sandy beaches when all Keiko and Shihori had to look forward to was more work and the crowded rush of Tokyo.
The dress code was a little fancier than Shihori was used to, which had apparently been Jun-kun’s idea. But seeing herself in the mirror, the way her newly purchased navy cocktail dress fit perfectly, made her feel more confident. She couldn’t help giving a little twirl, seeing the fabric move. Keiko had gone for a floor-length deep red and kept fussing over how annoying it was going to be to drive in it.
The wedding ceremony itself was in a small Christian chapel in Mihama with just the family, but the reception was being held at one of the larger ryokans along the coast. As Keiko parked, switching out of the sneakers she used to drive and into her heels, Shihori watched the beautiful sunset, even in the chilly air of an early spring evening. This would be her final farewell to Minamichita, she decided. She’d have a great night celebrating her friend’s happiness and would leave with no regrets.
part three
From: cupid_johnny
Title: Turn Your Heart Around Towards Me
Pairing: Ohno Satoshi/Kanjiya Shihori; in the background, Matsumoto Jun/Inoue Mao
Rating: NC-17 (Real Talk: it’s 97% PG-13 but you know how it is…)
Summary: Some people had “the one who got away.” Shihori’s experience had differed. She’d been the one to get away, and he hadn’t lifted a finger to stop her.
A/N: Hello there, helenmaldon, it was a pleasure to write for you! I saw that you’re a Jane Austen fan, and once I knew Ohno was going to be my protagonist, my initial goal was to rewrite Persuasion for you. Didn’t quite happen, but I had a blast putting everyone’s beloved, curmudgeonly “old man” into a romance nonetheless. There’s no navy captain stuff, no meddling relatives. Instead I decided to just follow the heart of what makes Persuasion so compelling to me: the idea of getting a second chance at love. The title is from Ohno’s solo, Two.
It was unlike Nino to spend the entire workday avoiding him, but he’d only come by to do a cursory check of the fishing zone before hurrying away. After the women had left the night before, Nino had told Ohno to put his wallet away, had paid for the entire bill at Peking Duck instead of offering an actual apology.
What had happened was just so dumb. Everything had been going fine, everyone had been chatting, the food had been good. And then Ohno had just blurted out his unsolicited assistance and ruined everything. As he stared at the rows of merchandise, looked out across the open store to the golf area, all he could see was her.
She had always been pretty, but she was more grown-up now. When they’d broken up, she’d only been about 22, 23 years old. With a round girlish face, with an easy, cheerful smile. The woman he’d sat with the night before was more cautious, with a slightly sharper edge. Maybe it came from teaching, dealing with teenagers all day, but there was a wariness in her eyes now. Maybe it came from him. Maybe he’d made her that way.
“Do you have any more of the Chico crankbaits?” someone asked. Ohno blinked himself out of his guilt, turning to address the customer behind him.
“You get that from the end of the aisle here?”
“Yeah,” the guy said, holding up the package. “Where are the rest?”
“Right this way. We’ve got a buy two, get one free promotion on the Chico line right now.”
He focused on helping the customer, probably going above and beyond to explain what they had in stock. The customer didn’t seem to mind at least. But once he’d made his purchase, the fishing zone was quiet again, leaving Ohno kicking himself for all the things he’d managed to screw up in so short a time.
It was Nino’s fault too, but maybe it was Ohno’s fault for not saying anything. Ohno’s fault for not going “you know I haven’t seen her in seven years, and the last time I did, I broke her heart. Tread lightly.”
The wedding reception was tomorrow evening. All he had to do was pick up the tux rental in the morning, show up for a few hours, and wish Jun and Mao well. Then Shihori and Keiko would leave Sunday or Monday, back to their lives in Tokyo. He could get through it. He could do that much couldn’t he? The answer to that was “no” the more hours passed that day. The last thing he needed to do was make things worse, especially on a day that wasn’t about him at all.
He was working until closing that night, and he still had five hours to go. They usually had better crowds, but it had been pouring rain on and off since the morning. He wasn’t looking forward to standing at the bus stop later that night, seeing as how he’d forgotten his umbrella. He supposed he could always buy one from the store if it got really bad out there. He could imagine Jun standing in the Hug Diner right now, staring defiantly out the front window and commanding the rain to stop.
Ohno had known Mao-chan as one of Shihori’s friends, but Jun’s friendship had come a little later. He and Ohno had very little in common. Jun was all about action, about continual improvement, whether it was some new menu item or training for a 10K. He was persistent in maintaining their friendship, inviting Ohno out for drinks or asking him to grab a date and join him and Mao for a night out in Nagoya. Ohno considered himself a Hug Diner customer before anything else, but Jun and Mao always laughed when he said as much.
He was happy for them, but he didn’t dare diminish any aspect of their perfect day. And besides, people expected that from him, didn’t they? They expected him to be stubborn, to go his own way. To decide something on a whim and refuse to budge. That was how he found himself dialing Jun’s cell number in the break room a few hours before closing, after Nino had already gone home.
Jun was incredibly frazzled upon answering, was apparently wrapping up the rehearsal dinner with the parents and his future in-laws early on account of the weather. “I’m sorry to bother you, Matsumoto-kun,” Ohno said, staring at the break room vending machine.
“It’s not a bother,” Jun replied, although he was a really terrible liar. “Is something wrong?”
“I’m not going to be able to make it tomorrow,” he said, hoping he sounded calm. “Something’s come up last minute.”
“Is everything okay? Has something happened? I remember you telling me your father wasn’t feeling well a few weeks back, is he okay?”
“No, no, he’s fine.” His dad had only had a nasty bout of acid reflux. “It’s just…I won’t be able to come.”
“If the weather’s keeping you from getting to the venue, I already told you we’ve got a shuttle service hired that can come get you…”
“Sorry to cause you trouble. I do have a gift. I’ll bring it to you at the diner when you get back from the honeymoon…”
“Ohno-san,” Jun interrupted. “Ohno-san, wait a moment…”
He hung up, feeling like complete shit. He turned off his phone too. There, now the day could go ahead without a hitch.
By now he was the most senior employee in the store, and as the rain picked up, the wind howling outside the windows, he started sending people home. They had maybe a handful of customers in the entire place by 8:00, and he decided to close up early. He made an announcement over the public address system, telling everyone to please get home safely.
By 8:30 he was ready for final checks, listening to the rain splatter against the building, hammering the roof in an unrelenting fashion. Not quite the typhoon Jun had been dreading, but still a nasty storm. He walked the ground floor, double checking the changing rooms, in between the aisles to make sure everyone had gone. He moved through athletic apparel, through shoes, through exercise machines before taking his key and shutting the escalators down for the night.
He jogged upstairs, doing final checks of the fishing zone, camping, outdoor apparel, golf. There was a crash of thunder and the overhead lights flickered, making him jump. They were on a timer, would go off on their own after Ohno locked the place up and waited in the rain for the bus. Well, he hoped the buses were still running. He’d have to put his phone back on and check, would have to call a cab if he was out of luck.
He headed back downstairs, just in time to hear knocking. Hurrying toward the front doors of the store that he’d already locked, he could see someone was outside hitting them. Maybe it was Kaede-chan, one of the cashiers. She was always forgetting her phone in the break room.
There was another clap of thunder, followed up by lightning a few seconds later. He got the doors opened, and the person hurried inside with a squeak of galoshes on the floor. She was wearing a rain poncho, bright green, and when she pulled the hood down, Ohno was surprised. It wasn’t Kaede.
“Shii-chan,” he said, gaping at her for a few seconds, watching the rain slide down her face, trickle down the sleeves of her poncho. “I should…I should close the door.”
He got it shut again, the wind proving itself a force to contend with. He turned, seeing Shihori standing there soaking wet on the Everything Outdoor logo on the floor of the entryway.
“What are you doing here? How did you get here?”
“Kei-chan’s car,” she said, her galoshes still squeaking on the linoleum.
There was more thunder, more lightning, and he stared at her. “You drove here in the rain? That’s dangerous.”
Her hair was probably the driest thing about her, tied up in a messy bun, and she wiped water from her face with the palm of her hand. “Yeah, it probably was.” She stood her ground. “Mao-chan texted me and Keiko, said you weren’t coming tomorrow. She was very worried. Are you okay?”
She drove all the way to the store in a thunderstorm to ask him that?
“They tried to call you but you didn’t answer,” she continued. “So I was worried it might have something to do with me. Keiko didn’t want me to come, but after last night and you having to pay for our drinks and everything, I thought that maybe you were angry, and you have no right to take it out on Mao and Jun so…”
“I’m not angry,” he interrupted, but she kept going.
“You were invited the same as me, and you should go. I don’t want things to be weird, and it’s just a wedding, you know? So I think it’s perfectly easy for us to coexist in the same room for a few hours. It’s been seven years after all. And it’s silly for us to behave this way when we’re both adults, so will you please come tomorrow?”
She was completely serious, pleading with him to change his mind. She’d come all this way, against her friend’s advice, against all common sense given how awful the weather was. He saw hints of her, that girl he’d fallen in love with. The one who knew how stubborn he could be. Despite their history, despite everything he’d done, she wanted to put Jun and Mao’s feelings first, even if it meant having to see him.
He’d always felt that no matter how terribly he’d gone about it, he’d made the right call in allowing her to walk away, to pursue her career and a life away from him. For the first time, after seven long years convincing himself that it had all been for the best, letting her go, he felt regret. She owed him nothing, but here she was. He missed her. He’d never admitted it before but damn it, he missed her so badly.
He kept all of those thoughts to himself for now. Instead he pointed at her. “You’re going to catch a cold.”
She looked aside for a moment. “I told myself I’d come here and say what I wanted to say. And I have. So I’ll just go home and curl up with some tea…”
“No!” he said, surprising himself with how emphatic he was. “I mean, at least wait until the rain slows down a bit. I can’t let you go back out in that.”
She looked around the store nervously. “I thought you were still open…”
“I sent everybody home. I was just closing up to go home myself. But I’m not going to let you drive in this storm.”
“That could take hours!” she protested. “I looked at the hour-by-hour forecast and there were those little cartoony umbrellas for the next twelve hours at least!”
He took a deep breath, watching the puddle grow at her feet. “If I agree to go to the wedding tomorrow, will you just listen to me? It’s safer for you in here than out there. You know the roads get washed out sometimes around here.”
She thought about it a moment. She’d probably acted impulsively, not realizing how bad it was until she was already halfway to see him. And now here she was, having expected Everything Outdoor to still be open, not closed early with him the only person on premises. She probably didn’t want to spend any more time with him than was necessary. And he couldn’t blame her for that. But her safety was what made Ohno so insistent. Not just the realization that he missed her.
“Let me call Keiko,” she said, yanking awkwardly at the bottom of her poncho to pull her cell phone from the pocket of her jeans. “If I’m staying here for however long, the buses will stop running, you know.”
“I don’t care.”
She typed in her phone password, unlocked it. “Well I’ll give you a ride home when you decide it’s safe again, Mr. Weather Advisor.”
He grinned, remembering how much she’d always teased him. It felt good, maybe too good, to hear it from her again. He moved away, ensuring the front door was locked as he gave her some privacy to call up Keiko. He stared out the front door glass, seeing the small hatchback parked in the lot all by its lonesome. Kanjiya Shihori, he thought with a bitter grin, why’d you have to come back?
-
The poncho and galoshes she’d borrowed from Keiko’s mother had been somewhat helpful, but they were now laid out to dry on the floor of Everything Outdoor. Much as Keiko had been annoyed with her for wanting to see him, she’d been too insistent to let her friend change her mind. Mao, who had always been a calm and laid-back sort of person, had contacted them in a panic. “Is something wrong with Ohno-san? Is he okay? Have we offended him in some way?”
No, Shihori had wanted to message her back, no he’s just being as pigheaded as ever, probably thinking he was sidestepping drama by ditching the wedding. But because Ohno Satoshi had the world’s worst sense of timing, his abrupt last minute cancellation had Mao and Jun worried that there’d been a death in his family or something else quite serious. In attempting to not cause drama, Ohno had created more. The idiot.
And now she was stuck here, because much as she didn’t want to admit it, it had been a terrifying drive up the coastal highway to the store. Waves had been crashing high enough to almost reach the barriers on the side of the road, and if they got washed out, there was no way Keiko’s small car would get through any flooding. So against her better judgment, she would be here alone in Everything Outdoor with Ohno until the storm calmed down.
She was now in stocking feet, her jeans soaked from the knees down because of the blowing rain and the poncho flapping around when she ran from the parking lot to the door. She’d been equally dumb in only wearing a t-shirt, and she was freezing. Ohno seemed to realize this as soon as she’d hung up the phone and discarded the soaking poncho and galoshes.
“You need to change clothes,” he said. “Seriously.”
Thankfully she was too teeth-chatteringly cold to worry about blushing from his words. It was an outdoor store, luckily enough. One of the best places to be stuck for a few hours. He left her alone, letting her peruse the athletic wear section for something to change into. He’d even whipped out the “Suave and Confident Ohno” voice she remembered from so many years ago, telling her “get whatever you want, I’ll pay for it. Just hand me the tags, and I’ll scan them at the register.”
Free merchandise, courtesy Everything Outdoor. She was tempted to grab a really expensive pair of yoga pants made with the newest, fanciest microfibers, but she was the dummy who’d taken on a storm and driven up here. He was just being nice to her when he could have just directed her to the employee break room to let her put on stuff from the lost and found bin.
She opted for some thermal pants, a long-sleeved top, and a zip-up fleece, bringing her merchandise to him diligently. He still had that pocket knife on him, the one he’d used all those years ago on their lighthouse lock, using it to cut the tags off for her. If he was thinking about that day, he certainly didn’t look like he was. He probably used that pocket knife for everything, and he’d never had a memory for little moments like that.
She took the clothes to the empty dressing room, and it was rather creepy being in there alone at night. Whenever she’d closed out the store when she worked here, there was always someone else around, or they’d turn up the music over the store’s sound system. It was different tonight with the rain playing its relentless drum beat against the roof, the mirrors reflecting her lonely image and waterlogged jeans.
Shihori dressed quickly, using some of the hangers in the changing room to hang up her wet clothes. Maybe if she got bored she’d go to the women’s restroom, use the blow dryers on her jeans. For now she just came out of the room and back into the empty, cavernous store, feeling a lot more comfortable now in her pink fleece and warm pants.
She found him at the register, adding the receipt he’d just printed out to the cash drawer. “I’m just going to lock this back up and I’ll be right back.” He couldn’t help grinning at her. “If you want to use any of the exercise bikes, I can set that up for you.”
“I didn’t plan on exercising, thank you. I’m technically on vacation, you know.”
“Suit yourself!”
It was so weird being in this huge place all alone. The lights were still on, so there weren’t an abundance of shadows keeping things hidden and scary. There was that “store smell” she remembered so fiercely, even though she hadn’t been through the door in years. Racks and racks of lycra, baseball team t-shirts, the upper floor with golf clubs and fishing rods. Shihori still didn’t like to fish, and she remembered that she’d only started having feelings for Ohno once she’d gotten herself transferred over to shoes, spending her days on the ground floor, not seeing him any longer except during breaks or at the end of a shift.
The memory ached, and being in the store made it all the more real. She took any shift she could get, any bit of money helping with her school expenses. No matter how tired she’d get juggling work, school, the commute back and forth from Nagoya, it had been worth it. She’d be there in the evening just after they closed, re-boxing sneakers and soccer cleats that customers had put back in the wrong place, and she’d see him coming down the escalator, staring into space. But then he’d come by, pick up one of the display shoes, and tap her on the shoulder with it.
“Hey, shoe girl.”
She’d been the one to ask him out, albeit in a roundabout way. A movie, she’d asked him to a movie, and when it was over he’d been brutally honest. “That was terrible,” he’d said, crinkling his nose and making her heart sink. But then he’d been the one to say “I’ll pick the movie next time.” The rest was history. Ancient history, Shihori tried to remind herself as she slowly walked up and down the aisles.
A jolt of thunder shook the entire store, making her jump, letting out a tiny squeal in panic. The storm was getting closer. She was safe here, she reminded herself. Hell, the rest of Japan could wash away and she was in the best place to survive. They had enough beef jerky and protein powder under the roof to last out the apocalypse. They’d joked about it back then, making it their plan for the end of the world. “I’ll meet you at the store,” he’d say. “When the zombies come.”
Well, there were no zombies tonight, and she doubted Japan was going to disappear overnight. But there was something kind of final about walking these aisles after so many years, asking him to attend the wedding, getting through the weekend, and then getting back to her life. Keiko had said it might be a good idea to see him, to find closure in it. To allow herself to finally move on.
She must have been wandering around for half an hour at least when she found him on an elliptical machine, arms balanced against the display panel, his legs swinging back and forth aimlessly. Whoosh, whoosh, whoosh, back and forth. He’d ditched the employee vest, was down to the white polo tee, khakis, and sneakers. He hadn’t noticed her yet, and she couldn’t help watching. Saying a silent goodbye to the guy who still worked here, who probably hadn’t changed at all from the day she’d left him behind. He was still endearingly cute, much as she was embarrassed to admit it.
As always, his face was at complete peace. Over the years, she’d learned that Ohno Satoshi was a 50/50 guy. Fifty percent of the time, when he was showing that peaceful expression - eyes glazed over, mouth occasionally quirking from side to side - he wasn’t thinking anything at all. He could just disappear, let the seconds go by, lost in absolutely nothing. But then the other fifty percent of the time he was thinking about something incredibly intently. The lures he was going to pack for his next deep sea excursion with friends on a charter tour. One of the sketches he’d started and hadn’t finished.
She wondered which fifty percent was in action right now.
“Shall we check how it looks outside?” she asked, and his legs slowed their movements.
With another timely crack of thunder, he laughed. “It sounds like it’s getting worse, not better.”
She pulled her phone from her back pocket - 9:52 PM.
“It’s almost 10:00!” She leaned against one of the other machines, frowning. “It’ll be better if you’re with me in the car, you can help me navigate. We can’t be here forever!”
He shook his head. “Not safe, especially after dark. I know for a fact that Keiko would kill me if I let something happen to you. Her dad’s a doctor, right? She’d probably inject me with something…”
Shihori didn’t bother rushing to defend her friend’s honor and inability to commit murder. Keiko was the best friend a girl could ask for, but she was fairly certain that Keiko would demand she stay and wait out the storm for her own safety. Even if it meant being stuck with Oh-chan even longer.
“Did you eat anything?” she asked him. “Anything proper, I mean. For dinner?”
He shrugged. “I had a cereal bar during my last break.”
A grown man, and he still half-assed things like this. “Well, if we’re stuck here, Ohno-san, we should probably eat something.”
She was astonished by the hurt look she saw register on his face as soon as she’d called him ‘Ohno-san’. What else was she supposed to call him though? He recovered quickly enough, hopping down from the machine. They were heading for the break room and Ohno’s promise of some leftovers in the employees’ shared fridge when the lights went out.
-
He’d forgotten about the timer for the lights, so when they went out all of a sudden, he was confused. This confusion only lasted a second or so because then she was fumbling for him in the dark. “Oh-chan,” she was saying, and he kind of hated how much he liked hearing it again. “Oh-chan?”
“I’m here,” he said. He couldn’t help holding out his hand, waiting for her to find it. “I’m right here. The main lights are on a timer, they always go out at 10:00, I’m sorry for forgetting to tell you. But the backups will come on, remember? It’ll be a minute before they fully light.”
They weren’t standing that far apart, but she’d always been more of a scaredy cat than she ever let on. She’d gone to scary movies with him, back then, and even though he could usually tell when something was going to happen, she never could. He remembered how good it had felt, some bloody scene or scary moment frightening her into clinging to him, her head butting against his shoulder as she tried to hide her eyes.
“Tell me when it’s over, Oh-chan. I don’t know why I see these things with you,” she’d always said, and he remembered how her fingers had closed tightly around his arm. He’d never been the princely type, but still she’d sought him out to comfort and calm her.
It was that same tone in her voice, that “Oh-chan” that sounded just the same all these years later when she finally found his fingers with her own. Instead of holding onto his hand though, she settled for twisting her fingers in the sleeve of his polo shirt. As the backup lights came on, he realized there was not going to be much visibility. There was one light in each section that glowed faintly, the lights over the exits, and not much else.
“I could go change the timer…”
“Won’t you get in trouble? You’re not even supposed to be here now, are you?” she asked, and he could feel her relax as she grew used to the darkness. He missed the closeness, the faint warmth of her as she let go of his shirt and took a step back.
With more thunder and lightning punctuating her words, he was at a loss for what to do with her. They definitely couldn’t drive out of here yet, but now the lights were off. “Maybe we should sleep,” he suggested, scratching an itch on the inside of his nose, happy she couldn’t see him do it. “Got the wedding tomorrow and you have to get back. Well, we both do.”
“Sleep?” she asked, sounding more annoyed than nervous now. “Sleep here in the store?”
“Weather’s not letting up, it’s after 10:00, what’s the harm?” He finished with his nose itching. “I mean, this is an outdoor store, remember? We’ve got sleeping bags. All the comforts of home. And beef jerky.” He chuckled quietly. “I remember, that big plan of ours, when we were planning to wait out the zombies here and…”
“Don’t,” she said quickly, and he felt like a jerk. He’d spent the last few days reliving the past, their past, the one they’d had together. Maybe she wasn’t terribly interested in thinking back to those days. For him, there was no real harm in remembering the good times. There’d been many of them, at least in his mind. But for her, obviously, all she could focus on was what he’d done. Or honestly, what he hadn’t done at all.
He shoved down his nostalgia, the happier memories they’d shared. Too little, too late, you idiot, he chided himself. “Well, come on. Nino comes to open the store around 8:30, so we’ll have to be out by then.”
She pulled her phone from her pocket, and soon there was a bluish glow lighting up her face. It was a little ghoulish, seeing her in the phone’s glow. “My battery won’t last too long. But we should set an alarm.”
This much he could do for her. “Let’s get you settled, and I’ll take care of the rest.”
Half an hour later, after a walk up the unmoving escalator, he’d upgraded Shihori from a simple sleeping bag to the six-person camping tent model they kept out on display in the middle of the camping zone year-round. Within, her cell phone was now connected to the store’s largest extension cord and plugged in to an outlet 20 feet away. Her alarm set for 7:00 AM, she had arranged herself atop a mound of sleeping bags and looked, to Ohno’s thinking, a bit like a queen in luxurious accommodations. Beside her sleeping area, there was the battery-powered camp light he’d set up, providing much better lighting than her phone screen or the emergency store lights.
He was just returning with a packet of beef jerky, tapping on the outside of the tent. “It’s me.”
She unzipped the tent entrance fully, laughing at him. “Who else would it be?”
He shrugged, thrusting the bag of jerky at her. “Here you go. There’s Gatorade, if you want Gatorade.”
“I’ve got the water you already brought,” she said, taking the bag. Her voice was a little quieter when she said “thank you.”
He hesitated, seeing that she’d taken off the fleece he’d paid for, had let her hair down so she could sleep. There was a soft little strand that had fallen a little out of place. A sudden urge to reach for it, to push it back where it belonged, nearly overwhelmed him. He wouldn’t do it, he couldn’t do it, but a memory hit hard.
He usually preferred falling asleep on his couch in his apartment, the glow of the TV lulling him into his dreams. Sometimes when she used to stay the night, he’d let her have the whole bed, but by the middle of the night she’d crawl onto the couch with him. He remembered that he usually couldn’t fall back asleep without stroking his fingers through her hair. Those moments, in the haze before he fell asleep, were the moments he’d loved her most. Having her close, keeping her safe in his arms, never wanting her to leave…
It took all his willpower to keep his hands to himself. He looked away from the temptation of her hair. What a creep he was being. If he’d really never wanted her to leave, he should have said something. Long ago. “I’ll stay out here, I’m not too tired yet.”
“Okay,” she said, and he could hear the rustling of the jerky pack in her hands. “Good night.”
“Sweet dreams.”
She zipped the tent back up, and because of the camp light he could see the outline of her sitting inside, opening the jerky pack. To give her some privacy to eat and settle in, he busied himself with unrolling a sleeping bag on the carpeted area of the camping zone, setting himself up near the aisle of canteens and camp stoves nearby. After that was complete, he decided it was best to walk off what he was feeling, to think of something, of anything that wasn’t the girl he’d loved and lost being here in the store with him alone.
He left camping, headed for golf, letting the dim lights and his own familiarity with the store’s layout guide him along. It was usually so easy to just switch off, to lose himself in nothing or in his hobbies. He tried to focus on the rhythm of the rain, trying to think rationally. He was happy to see her, and he was obviously still physically attracted to her, that was all there was to it. It had been almost a year since he’d even dated anyone more than a handful of times. Maybe he was just lonely, he decided. She’d go back to Tokyo, and this would just be an isolated incident.
He was poking at golf shoes now, increasingly distracted by the thought of her in that tent by herself, unzipping it and beckoning to him. “Oh-chan,” she’d say, “this is a six-person tent, just come in here already.” He sighed in exasperation, feeling himself getting hard at the thought of it. What he needed to do was go downstairs and get on one of those exercise machines and tire himself out.
Instead he made a loop of the upper level of the store three times, losing his erection entirely once he started mentally reciting the SKU numbers for some of the merchandise in his section of the store. He only stopped when he came back around to the camping zone and saw that the light inside the tent was off. He didn’t need to make any further noise wandering around if she was trying to sleep.
Unlike the Korean soap operas he found himself watching at home when insomnia hit, there was no tent unzipping, no beckoning Shihori asking him to come in and keep her company. There was no dramatic swell of music as a long lost romance miraculously rekindled. Instead he took off his shoes and belt, getting into the sleeping bag several feet away from the tent. And that was it.
-
Shihori woke before her alarm, stirring around 6:30 with the need to use the bathroom. She had slept surprisingly well, given how nervous she was. Ohno had gone above and beyond what was necessary to keep her comfortable, and if anyone but Nino was his boss, he’d be getting in trouble for using store merchandise in this manner. She pulled on the fleece he’d bought her and unzipped the tent.
Padding out in her stocking feet, she couldn’t hear the rain and looked up to see sunshine pouring through the skylight at the top of the store. It was far less frightening now. As the beams of sunshine lit the clothing racks and aisles, it looked far friendlier than it had during the night. The store restrooms were on the ground floor, and she passed a lumpy red sleeping bag a little ways off from her tent. Oh-chan, still asleep.
She felt so much better once she used the washroom, rinsing her hands and face in the sink, using the water bottle he’d brought her last night to at least rinse her mouth out since she didn’t have a toothbrush. She’d had mornings like this before, sleeping over at a boyfriend’s house in the early stages before any of her own personal items were there. It was on a grander scale, doing so in a retail store. She checked herself out in the mirror, sliding her fingers through her hair a bit to feel a little more presentable.
She headed back upstairs, moving a little quickly because the steps of the motionless escalator were chilly on her socked feet. They had to get the store back to presentable before they left, before Nino arrived and tried to infer whether or not she and Ohno had used their time alone and slept together. The thought sent an uncomfortable sensation through her. Was that what Kei-chan had been so annoyed with her about, when Shihori had been so insistent on leaving last night? Had she thought Shihori had so little love for herself that she would throw herself at Oh-chan? He hadn’t even touched her, and he wasn’t the sort of person who’d ignore the past just to get laid in the present, was he?
Not that the idea hadn’t crossed her mind, sitting alone in that huge tent before giving in to sleep. He was still the Oh-chan who’d hurt her, but they were both different people now. Maybe when she got back to Tokyo she’d give dating a try again. It would certainly be healthier than dwelling on the strange night they’d just had together, wondering what might have happened if he’d been bolder, had unzipped the tent and asked to share the space with her.
Shihori made her way over to the red sleeping bag lump, feeling a little guilty that he’d slept out here all alone in a solitary sleeping bag when she’d been sleeping in comparative luxury. He was sleeping on his side, and she could see the vaguest outline of him within, his body curled up in an “S” shape. His head poked out the top, and her heart ached a little to see his sleeping face again after so many years apart. So peaceful, his little snores. Well, whatever, she told herself. They had tidying to do and a wedding to get through before this weekend could end.
She poked at him with her foot, seeing his eyes slowly open. He looked up at her in confusion first, a little slow in remembering exactly why she was there. “Good morning,” he finally said, holding up a hand to his eyes. “Ah, it’s bright.”
“A beautiful day for a wedding, I’m guessing.”
She watched him smile. “Matsumoto-kun will be much easier to deal with.”
Without much more prompting, Ohno got out of his sleeping bag, and though he told her she didn’t have to help, she insisted anyway. Together they packed up all the items they’d opened, setting them back. While they were doing so, Ohno allowed himself a rather wicked smile, informing her that he’d turned off the store cameras while she’d been changing the night before, simply so there’d be no record of them having spent the night in the store. Nino would just assume there’d been a malfunction, maybe a power short from the storm.
“That’s rather crafty of you,” Shihori said as they carried the opened box with the camp light to the Product Returns area in Guest Relations. “A dishonest employee would have stolen money or merchandise.”
“I’m extremely honest,” he said, taking an individually-wrapped piece of jerky from the bag she held out to him, opening it and biting into it eagerly. “Like, these cost 390 yen so I’ll just scan it and put cash in the drawer for it before we leave.”
“A paragon of virtuous behavior,” she replied, unable to keep from smiling. He’d always been a good person, an honest person. It was that brutal honesty, of course, that had broken them apart. But that was in the past, Shihori thought.
It had been so hard, coming to Minamichita. Even Thursday night at the Peking Duck had been so difficult, seeing Oh-chan again. But now, tidying up the store, he was so easy to talk to, as though things were fine between them. Maybe they were now. Maybe she really was moving on. She could go back to Tokyo a whole person, leaving Minamichita without heartbreak or regret.
Once the store was back in order, she gathered up the items she’d borrowed from Keiko’s mother, getting her own clothes from the changing room. Ohno gave her an Everything Outdoor bag to carry everything, and he locked the store down so Nino would arrive and be none the wiser. They got into Keiko’s car, and though the parking lot was dotted here and there with puddles, the rain had definitely stopped. The bright morning sunshine was a welcome sight.
She drove them back, and even though they drove through Mihama, home to the infamous lighthouse and their lock, Shihori didn’t feel too sad. Ohno was a quiet car companion, humming gently with the radio when a song he liked came on but otherwise not troubling her at all. He was peaceful to be with, the type of person who was soothing. Whenever she’d had a rough exam at university, all she’d ever needed was to go to him, to settle her head in his lap and let him stroke her hair without saying a word. A good memory. Not everything had to be sad where he was concerned now, right?
It was just after 8:00 when she pulled over into the parking area near his apartment building. She left the car running, putting it in park and looking over. He was pulling his house keys from the pocket of his work khakis. “Thank you,” she said. “You were right, making me stay. It would have been too dangerous to drive in that storm.”
He nodded in acknowledgment.
“Well,” she said, not knowing what else to say. “Thanks for your help, with the clothes and everything. I guess I’ll see you tonight.”
He exhaled heavily, and unlike his usual calm expression, the one he’d managed to wear all morning so far, he looked a little troubled when he turned to look at her. “Do you want something to eat? I could make some breakfast. Since you went to the trouble of driving me.”
The entire car ride, the entire morning, Shihori had been feeling confident, pleased that she’d been able to spend time with him and not go crazy or get lost in sad memories. It had been fine because he hadn’t done or said anything to imply that there was more to their little reunion than there really was. But now he was looking at her like he didn’t want her to go. And that was a dangerous road to venture down. There was no reason to go inside, to let him cook her a meal like he used to. She’d been on the verge of getting the clean, polite break she hadn’t gotten from him before. After the wedding, they would be out of each other’s lives for good.
Had she been reading his reticence wrong this entire time?
She hid her confused, strange feelings and gave him a smile instead. “Oh, no. Thank you, it’s no trouble, really. Kei-chan will probably be worried if I don’t get back. We’ll see you tonight, okay?”
His disappointment was readily apparent when he nodded in response. Just what did he want from her? And why now, after all this time? “I’ll see you then.”
Shihori was grateful that Keiko’s parents weren’t home when she returned. It was just Keiko, throwing together breakfast for them in the kitchen and giving her the third degree when she came in, wearing different clothes than she’d left in.
She told Keiko everything, save for the little awkward exchange in the car. “He was always so strange,” Keiko said, scooping rice out of the cooker for her. “But I suppose a more unscrupulous person would have tried to put the moves on you.”
“Huh?”
“Trapped in a storm, thrown together after so long. One of those overdramatic situations where common sense goes flying out the window.” Keiko sighed. “But again, you’re smarter than that and it’s not like he’s some romantic lead with smoldering good looks you can’t resist…”
“That’s enough, okay?” she grumbled, somehow overwhelmed with the need to defend Ohno. “Just because he’s not some teen idol…”
Keiko poured out some coffee into mugs, dropping the topic. After all, she’d been the one to think Shihori would be better off seeing him again in the first place. They turned to cheerier subjects while they ate, Bill coming down for his breakfast and to bump his head against Shihori’s shins in greeting. They enjoyed a lazy, leisurely morning and afternoon, curling up in front of the large TV in the Kitagawas’ living room with some DVDs while the cat snoozed.
Tearing themselves away was difficult later on, once it was time to get ready for the reception. They gossiped about other people from high school, taking turns with the curling iron and fussing over makeup, expressing their jealousy about Mao and Jun’s forthcoming honeymoon in Okinawa. Sunshine and sandy beaches when all Keiko and Shihori had to look forward to was more work and the crowded rush of Tokyo.
The dress code was a little fancier than Shihori was used to, which had apparently been Jun-kun’s idea. But seeing herself in the mirror, the way her newly purchased navy cocktail dress fit perfectly, made her feel more confident. She couldn’t help giving a little twirl, seeing the fabric move. Keiko had gone for a floor-length deep red and kept fussing over how annoying it was going to be to drive in it.
The wedding ceremony itself was in a small Christian chapel in Mihama with just the family, but the reception was being held at one of the larger ryokans along the coast. As Keiko parked, switching out of the sneakers she used to drive and into her heels, Shihori watched the beautiful sunset, even in the chilly air of an early spring evening. This would be her final farewell to Minamichita, she decided. She’d have a great night celebrating her friend’s happiness and would leave with no regrets.
part three