A treat for nikouru
A treat for: nikouru
Cooked up by: A Friendly Chef
Title: 6 Things I Hate About Yuu
Characters/Groups: Yoko-centric Kanjani8
Genre: Friendship/Member Ai
Rating: G
Warnings: Maybe a bit angsty in places, Yoko being Yoko
Author's Notes: nikouru, I really enjoyed writing this, so I hope you like it! (Also, one note on the text: the kanji for “shrine” (宮) and one form of “official” (官) -- I’m not sure how easily confused they would be for a native speaker, but I decided to take a bit of creative license and just assume that it could happen especially where Yoko is concerned.)
“So.” The interviewer started as Yoko took a seat across from her, her notepad and pocket sized tape recorder already laid out on the table between them.
Yoko smiled at her a bit nervously and shifted a little in his seat, waiting for her to continue. When she didn’t, he stopped fidgeting and looked up, forcing himself to meet her eyes, only to find her staring back at him, wearing an amused sort of half-smile.
“Nervous?”
“What? No. I do this sort of thing all the time.” Yoko lied, trying not to fidget. “I’m a Johnny, remember?”
“Hard to forget.” She threw him a questioning look as she reached over, letting her finger hover over the button on the recorder, waiting for him to nod his okay before she hit record. “Don’t worry. We only have a few questions for you today. Thirty minutes tops and you’re out of here.”
“Thirty minutes. Piece of cake!” He laughed and forced a smile that the reporter returned briefly before she glanced down at her note pad and launched into the interview. If he hadn’t already done this a million times before the abrupt subject change might have been jarring.
“We’re doing a special on self-improvement this next month and we want to know what Kanjani8 would like to improve about themselves.” She smiled at him again, the expression more bland and professional this time. “So, Yokoyama-san, what things would you like to improve about yourself?”
“Improve about myself?”
“What would you change about yourself if you could?”
“No, I understand the question.” Yoko shook his head and let out a nervous laugh. “It’s just... how many do you want to know?”
That startled a laugh out of her and she shook her head, smiling at him as her pen hovered over the paper. “As many as you want to give.”
“We might be here awhile.”
“We’ve got plenty of time.”
“In that case, then,” Yoko paused, eyes focusing on the table as he continued with a small, self-deprecating smile, “I probably shouldn’t say this since I’m an idol, but definitely my singing.”
--
“Your parts are in black.” Yoko nodded as he took the song sheets from the intern, bowing his head a little and offering a mumbled thanks and a quick smile. He wandered over in front of the sound booth and tried to stay out of the way, hovering near the back as he watched Subaru finishing up his sections of the vocals through the large glass viewing window.
He could hear the techs giving Subaru directions but didn’t really listen to them, too busy trying not to fidget. Recording tracks for records was one of his least favorite things. He knew that he wasn’t a great singer (although he still thought Hina was worse) and he knew that the staff knew it, too, and part of him suspected that they hated it when it was Yoko’s turn to record his parts as much as he did. Being after Subaru this time only made him feel that much more inadequate, knowing that his sections were nothing compared to what Subaru had to do, but they’d probably still take twice as long with all his screw ups and the constant need to do things over. He bit back the urge to start apologizing to the sound techs ahead of time for mistakes he hadn’t even made yet.
“Yokoyama-san?”
“Hm?” He blinked, smiling sheepishly as he realized that Subaru had already finished and it was his turn to step into the booth. He could see his bandmate inside, slipping the headphones off and gathering his papers off the stand in front of him, smiling at something one of the techs had said and looking a lot more satisfied with his work than Yoko knew he would when he was done.
“Your turn.”
“Yes--sorry.” Yoko held in a sigh and moved toward the door, his hand tightening around the lyrics sheets clutched in his hand, rumpling the pages slightly.
“Yoko. Hey.” Subaru was halfway to the door when Yoko slipped inside but stopped when he spotted him and grinned. “I didn’t know you were recording today, too.”
“Yeah, have to get it out of the way sometime.” Yoko laughed and smiled wanly back at him. “Since you’re here you could always just do it for me.”
Subaru laughed. “Are you kidding me?”
“I don’t think anyone would really miss my voice.”
“I don’t think they’d let us get away with that.” Subaru tsked at him and smacked him in the arm with his lyrics sheets. “And I’d miss your voice.”
“You obviously have no taste.”
“Maybe not.” Subaru laughed, taking some of the edge off his words. “But it wouldn’t really be a Kanjani8 song without all our voices, would it?”
Yoko blinked, the corners of his mouth twitching up into a smile. “I guess not. I hadn’t thought about it like that.”
“Well, now you have.” Subaru grinned, patting him on the shoulder as he stepped around him towards the door. “Do your best today.”
“Thanks. I will.” Yoko waited until the door swung shut to step up to the microphone, still smiling to himself.
--
The reporter jotted down some quick notes and arched an eyebrow in what he guessed was supposed to be disbelief. “That must make being an idol hard. Singing is what you’re trained to do, right?”
“And dancing.” Yoko grinned and looked up from the table, shaking his head. “But I’m not very good at that, either.”
--
One, two, three, four--Yoko counted out the beats in his head, struggling to mouth the lyrics and force the corresponding movements from his limbs with something that at least resembled grace. Thirteen years and he still felt almost as clumsy learning choreography as he had when he’d fumbled his way through his audition as a junior (how he’d managed to get through it without tripping over his feet or smacking anyone with a wayward hand or elbow, he still didn’t know). Years of practice between now and then and he still didn’t think it felt any easier; he was always second guessing himself, going right when he should have gone left or turning just a split second too early.
Like he was doing right now.
“No, Yoko--it’s right on three and then a half-turn on four.” Yasu put a hand on his arm and Yoko stopped, stumbling a little over his feet.
“Sorry.” Yoko groaned and pushed his hair off of his forehead, grimacing as his hand came back covered in sweat. “Sorry. I always screw up that part.”
“It’s okay.” Yasu’s expression softened into a smile and he shook his head, nudging Yoko over toward the bottles of water and chairs waiting for them on the other side of the practice room. “Let’s take a break.”
“But--”
“Break.” Yasu nudged him more forcefully and Yoko gave in, grumbling about people who acted cheerful to cover their secret DoS sides and just how hard they made his life.
Yasu ignored him, smiling to himself and offering Yoko a bottle of water and a towel before grabbing one for himself, sinking into one of the chairs with a grateful sigh. “Learning the choreography is always the hardest part, isn’t it?”
Yoko took a swig of his water and sighed, slouching down in his chair. “It must be even harder when your partner can’t remember his parts.”
“Not really.”
“Right.” Yoko snorted. “So this really wouldn’t be any easier if you were with one of the others? Maru or Ohkura or Hin--well okay, maybe not Hina.”
Yasu laughed, mopping sweat off of his face. “No, not really.”
“You could do a lot more with someone who’s better at this kind of thing.” Yoko mumbled, one side of his mouth quirking upwards as he tried to keep his tone light.
“Maybe, but I like working with you. We make a good team.”
“The Guy-Who-Can-Do-Anything and the Guy-Who-Can’t?”
“That’s not really fair. You’re good at a lot of things.”
“Not dancing.” Yoko laughed and shook his head.
“Maybe you’re not the best,” Yasu admitted, and Yoko groaned and gave him a look that said you weren’t supposed to agree with me. “But,” Yasu continued with a grin and a shrug. “Dancing’s not about focusing on what you can’t do. It’s about doing the best with what you can.”
“Yeah?” Yoko eyed him skeptically. “You’re not just saying that to make me feel better?”
“No.” Yasu laughed. “You know that’s the difference between good choreography and great choreography, right?”
“What is?”
“Good choreography has amazing moves. Great choreography has amazing moves that really show off the skills of the person dancing.”
“So what does that make this choreography?”
“I’d say pretty good.” Yasu looked thoughtful. “But with a few more hours practice, I think it could be great.”
“I was afraid you were going to say that,” Yoko groaned, but when Yasu stood a few minutes later he did the same, echoing the other’s smile.
--
“So, an idol who can’t sing or dance. That must be hard.”
“Yeah, well, I make do.”
“Some people say that idols are more about looks than talent, you know.”
“Yeah.” He laughed and nodded his head. “Looks are very important. You have to make sure you’re always at your best.”
“And are you?”
“At my best?” She nodded and Yoko shook his head. “I try, but it’s hard. I’m not lucky like some of the others--I have to work at it. Sometimes I feel like I’m always on a diet.”
“So you gain weight easily, then?”
“Too easily. I guess that’s another thing I’d want to change.” Yoko laughed. “Being able to eat whatever I want and not have to worry about gaining weight.”
--
“Ah, so full.” Maru leaned back against the back of the booth, smiling contentedly. He glanced at Yoko’s plate and frowned a little. “Not hungry?”
“Hm?” Yoko followed the direction of his gaze and shrugged. “I thought I’d take the rest home for lunch tomorrow.
Maru gave him a suspicious look. “Another diet?”
Yoko sighed and propped an elbow up against the table, resting one cheek against his palm with a frown. “That obvious?”
“They portions really aren’t that big here.” Maru laughed as the other pouted at him. “So is the diet because of the new drama?”
“Yeah. The clothes they keep giving me are so tight.”
“Then why don’t you ask for a different size?”
“What? No way, that’s embarrassing.” Yoko scrunched up his nose and started to push some of his leftover curry around his plate absently. “It’s only a few more weeks, anyway.”
Maru opened his mouth to respond, but the waitress interrupted him, sidling up to their table and smiling at them in a way that managed to be friendly without being annoying. “Can I get anything else for you? Dessert, maybe?”
“No, just the check,” Yoko answered, just as Maru said, “Oh, dessert sounds good.”
“Dessert? You just said you were full!”
“I’m full of dinner. There’s always room for dessert.” Maru grinned and Yoko sighed. Maru took it as an agreement and turned his smile on the waitress. “So, what do you have with lots of chocolate?”
The waitress grinned and rattled off a string of names and descriptions that made Yoko’s mouth water. She made it through the entire list before Maru settled on the very first thing she’d named--a piece of chocolate raspberry torte--and Yoko couldn’t help but wonder if Maru was purposefully trying to torture him by making him sit through all those descriptions or if he really was being that indecisive. Knowing Maru, he probably just was being that indecisive. The waitress turned to Yoko and asked if he wanted a piece of his own, but he waved her off as politely as he could and asked for a to-go box for the rest of his dinner instead
He tried very hard not to sulk while they waited for her to return and Maru started babbling about some new anime he was watching, but his attempts failed miserably when she returned a few minutes later with Maru’s dessert. It was arranged artfully on the plate and looked good enough that Yoko’s stomach growled. He willed it to be silent as he started to empty his plate into his take out container and tried to ignore the sounds Maru made as he took a bite. Rubbing it in, no doubt.
“Don’t take forever eating that. I have things to do at home, you know.”
“I’ll be fast.” Maru promised around a bite, sighing happily. He met Yoko’s eyes across the table and grinned, motioning at his plate and then at Yoko with his fork. “You should try this! It’s really good.”
“I’m on a diet.” Yoko reminded him, not caring how huffy he sounded.
“We can split it.” Maru nudged the plate toward him. “That’s barely half a dessert each.”
“What kind of logic is that?” Yoko looked from the plate to Maru’s face and then away again quickly.
Unfortunately, Maru seemed to catch the movement and nudged the plate forward until it was resting in the middle of the table, exactly between them. “Come on, I feel bad eating this in front of you!”
“Then it’s your fault for ordering!” The guilt card--Maru always knew when to play the guilt card. Yoko sighed and pouted at Maru half-heartedly, even as he gave in and lifted his hand to motion the waitress over to ask for a second fork. Maru practically beamed at him from across the table. “If I don’t fit into my pants at filming it’s your fault.”
“Okay,” Maru agreed a bit too cheerfully, waiting for the waitress to return with Yoko’s fork. When she did, he let Yoko take a bite before him and Yoko did this best not to act like he was enjoying the dessert too much, even if it was one of the best things he’d eaten in a long, long time.
When they were done, Maru laid his fork down against the plate with a happy sigh. “Thanks.”
“For what?”
“Sharing dessert with me.” Maru met his eyes, grinning widely. “Things always taste better when you can share them with friends.”
“I--yeah,” Yoko mumbled, ears going a little red as he looked away. “Well, you’re paying for it.”
--
The reporter tapped her pen against the paper, face thoughtful. “So, singing, dancing, looks--what about personality? A lot of our readers seem to think that’s what makes Kanjani8 really stand out. Their personalities.”
“We have a lot of personality.” Yoko grinned, the expression genuine. “I think it definitely makes us stand out.”
“And what about yours? You say you’re not good at singing and dancing, but you seem to have a lot of personality.”
“A lot, yes.” Yoko laughed, sounding nervous again. “I don’t know if it’s good, though.”
“Not good? Is there something you’d want to improve there, too?”
“Well, I’m really pessimistic. I never seem to be able to look on the bright side of things. I think I’d definitely change that if I could.”
--
“It’s so hot in here.” Yoko picked up his script and started to fan himself, his eyes drifting to the clock just behind Hina’s head. Five minutes to air time and then he’d officially be stuck here for the next three hours, trying not to die from heat exhaustion.
Hina laughed. “If you’re that hot, take off your hat.”
“What?” Yoko reached up, pulling the wool cap lower over his ears. “No. I like this hat.”
“Would you rather be stylish or comfortable? Quit being stupid and take it off.”
“My head’s not hot.” Yoko fanned himself a bit faster, his lie more than a little obvious. He turned to give a nearby staff member what he hoped was a pitiful look. “Does anyone have a fan we could put in here?”
“We can’t put a fan in here.” She looked genuinely apologetic as she bowed her head a little at him. “It would be too much noise for the mics.”
“We could just speak louder,” Yoko tried, already knowing the answer by the way she was looking at him. “The Gorilla here is already loud enough for two people.”
“Hey, speak for yourself.” Hina smacked him over the head and grinned when Yoko turned to give him a sour look, rubbing the back of his head.
“I almost had her.”
“Sure.” Hina laughed. “It can’t be that bad, you know?”
“It is that bad. I’m going to die of heat stroke if I have to work in this--”
“I didn’t mean the heat, I meant your hair.”
“My hair?” Yoko blinked, turning his head and reaching up to tug at his hat again. “This isn’t about my hair.”
“Do I look stupid to you?” Hina didn’t wait for his answer. “Nino already told me you got your hair cut for the drama.”
“Nino’s a traitor.” Yoko tugged his hat lower, covering his ears completely.
“He said it wasn’t that bad.”
“Yeah, well, it’s not his hair.” Yoko sighed. “And it is that bad. I look like a cross between an elementary school student and an old man.”
“But you like the drama, right?” Yoko nodded and Hina swatted at him half-heartedly. “Then what’s the big deal? It’s just hair. It will grow back.”
“Yeah, but how are people going to take me seriously like this? What if they take one look at me and think ‘Wow, that guy’s hair is so awful that I can’t focus on the story’ and then they stop watching and our ratings fall and I get labelled as a bad actor and never get cast in anything again?”
“You are such an idiot sometimes.” Hina laughed. “No one will stop watching because of your hair.”
“How do you know that?”
“Because, that’s stupid!”
“People do stupid things all the time!”
Hina sighed and shook his head. “You’re a good actor. No one will care about your hair.”
“You think so?”
“Yes.” One of the staff members leaned in, signalling that they were on in 30 seconds. They both nodded and Hina waited until she’d disappeared again to finish his thought. “You just need to have more faith sometimes. Just because something can go wrong doesn’t mean it will.”
“Well, we can’t all be overly optimistic gorillas, can we?” Yoko mumbled back, giving in and reaching up to tug off his hat while Hina just shook his head at him and laughed.
--
“Maybe it’s your charm that makes you a good idol, then. I’ve seen you on tv appearances--you always seem to be the one taking the lead in interviews.”
“Oh, that. That’s just on TV. I’m terrible at talking most of the time.”
“Really? I find that hard to believe.” She smiled, looking more than a little skeptical.
“No, really! I get so nervous.” Yoko darted his eyes up to her face and then away again, as if to prove his point. “I can’t talk to people I don’t know that well, usually. Even when I’m filming dramas, I have trouble talking to co-stars off camera.”
“So you’re shy, then?”
“Very!”
“That must make work awkward, then.”
“Sometimes. It’s hardest when I’m by myself. I’m not very interesting on my own.”
--
“Good job today.” The A.D. was turned halfway around in the passenger seat of the van, smiling at them in a way that Yoko was sure was meant to be encouraging but just looked tired. Not that he could blame him; spending the night in the middle of nowhere on a location shoot wasn’t exactly fun and games for any of them.
“You, too. Thanks for all your hard work.” Yoko was sure his exhaustion showed as he returned the smile. Beside him, Ohkura mumbled something to the same effect and the A.D. turned and settled into his seat, apparently satisfied. Yoko could hear the A.D. and their driver talking about something in the front seat, but the words got lost in the sound of traffic around them. He gave up trying to listen in after a few minutes and pulled his DS out of his pocket, switching it on just as a familiar weight settled against his shoulder.
He turned his head slightly and got a mouthful of Ohkura hair. “I can’t move my arm when you’re laying on me like that!”
Ohkura huffed and shifted his head just enough that Yoko could move his arm again. Appeased, Yoko fell silent and focused his attention on catching pixellated monsters on the screen in front of him, ignoring the way that the other man was snoring in his ear.
An hour and a half later, he’d managed to make it through three levels of his game and was starting to get bored and antsy. The worst part about location shoots was the hours they sometimes had to spend riding to and from said location with nothing to do except watch the scenery pass and try to think of creative ways to occupy themselves. Yoko usually opted for video games but today they just weren’t doing the trick. He switched his DS off and turned his head just enough to see the top of Ohkura’s head.
Well, if his method of occupying himself wasn’t working, maybe Ohkura’s would. He closed his eyes and leaned back against the seat, trying to let the movement of the van lull him to sleep. All it seemed to do was make him feel slightly nauseous and even more antsy, though, so he gave up after a few minutes and opened his eyes again with a sigh.
He shifted a little, thought about trying to draw their A.D. into a conversation then decided against it again just as quickly. He was a nice enough guy, but Yoko really didn’t know much about him outside of work. He turned his head a little, eyeing the top of Ohkura’s head again as he considered waking up his bandmate to keep him company. It was a risk, given that Ohkura wasn’t really all that entertaining or chipper right after being woken up, but being whined at was probably better than being bored.
“Hey, Tatsu.” Yoko shrugged his shoulder, jostling Ohkura against him. The other made a not-very-pleased noise, lifting his head slightly until Yoko stopped moving and then settling back against him with a soft huff. Yoko waited until he went still and then reached up to him on the cheek, speaking more loudly this time. “Hey, Ohkura.”
“What?” It was more of a whine than anything, but at least he sounded awake.
“I’m bored.”
“Take a nap.”
“I can’t sleep in the car.” It was Yoko’s turn to whine this time. “You should wake up and talk to me.”
Ohkura huffed. “About what?”
“Filming. How do you think it went?”
“I hope we never have to do that again.”
“You’d better hope we get low ratings, then.” Yoko laughed and stared out the window over the top of the other’s head. “So, how do you think the part you did on your own went?”
He could feel Ohkura shrug against him. “Okay. What about yours?”
“Ah,” Yoko laughed again and shook his head. “Terrible, really.”
“Why? They didn’t try to make you bungee jump, did they?”
“No, nothing like that. I just hate filming by myself. I’m so bad at it.” Yoko turned his head away from the window. “I wouldn’t be surprised if they cut it all out.”
“Why would they do that?”
“I’m so awkward on my own.” Yoko laughed. “When someone else is there, at least there’s something else for people to focus on.”
Ohkura lifted his head and Yoko turned to meet his eyes, a little surprised at the seriousness of the look the other was giving him. “You know what I kept thinking while I was filming my scene?”
“When’s lunch?”
Ohkura smiled sleepily and shook his head, laughing. “No. I kept thinking, ‘I wish Yoko was here’.”
“Wait--really?” Yoko blinked when Ohkura nodded at him. “Why?”
“Because it’s easier when someone else is there to help you.” Ohkura shrugged. “And you talk so much I don’t have to.”
Yoko laughed and Ohkura half-grinned, half-pouted at him. “So, can I go back to sleep now?”
“Go ahead.” Yoko offered his shoulder and pulled his DS back out of his pocket with a sigh.
--
“So, why did you chose to be an idol, then? It seems like it would be hard, if all of your weak points are things idols should be good at.”
“I didn’t really think about it at the time, but I guess I didn’t really have a lot of choices.”
“No? You never wanted to do anything else?”
“A few things, when I was younger, but I was always terrible at school.” Yoko laughed. “I’m not good with books and memorization or anything like that, so they weren’t really an option. They were mostly kids’ stuff, anyway.”
“So, not being good at school--I guess that’s something else you’d want to improve?”
“Oh, definitely. If I could.”
--
“This doesn’t make any sense.” Yoko held his phone out in front of him, lips pressed together in a thin line as he squinted at the screen.
“What?” Ryo stilled his finger, resting his palm against his guitar strings to silence them as he looked over at Yoko with a frown.
“Aiba just texted me to say he had to cancel our dinner plans because he has to... interview a shrine?”
“Let me see that.” Ryo made a face and reached for Yoko’s hand, pulling it closer for a better look at his phone. He finished reading and laughed as he let go of him. “He’s not interviewing a shrine, he’s interviewing an official.”
“What? Really?” Yoko squinted at his phone again, cheeks flushing in embarrassment. “Are you sure?”
“Positive.”
“I guess that makes more sense, then.” Yoko turned his attention back to his phone and sent Aiba a reply, feeling more than a little sheepish. Really, life would be a lot easier sometimes if people just stopped using kanji altogether. He hit send and snapped his phone shut, stealing a look at Ryo from the corner of his eye. “Hey, Dokkun.”
“What?”
“Does it ever bother you when you’re with NEWS?”
“Does what ever bother me?” Ryo gave him a clueless look.
“Don’t you ever feel weird, being the only one who didn’t finish High School?”
“Sometimes.” Ryo frowned and shrugged slightly. “What kind of a question is that, anyway?”
“I was just curious.” Yoko returned the other’s shrug and smiled, ducking his head to stare down at his hands as they fumbled with his phone absently. “I just think it would be hard sometimes, being around people who are that smart. Not that you’re not--I mean, you’re smarter than I am.”
Ryo snorted and smiled a confused smile, like he wasn’t sure whether to be flattered or offended. “Thanks.”
“No, I mean it!”
“I know.” Ryo laughed and elbowed Yoko in the arm. “And it does bother me sometimes. A little.”
“So what do you do about it?”
“Do? Nothing.” Ryo ran his fingers over the strings of his guitar again, expression thoughtful. “I just try not to let myself feel bad about it. I try not to worry about comparing myself to them and just trust myself, I guess.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. I mean, I am pretty awesome.” Ryo’s face broke out into a smile that showed a bit too many teeth, embarrassed laughter escaping him as he ducked his head. “Besides, like you said, at least I’m smarter than you are.”
Yoko laughed and pushed him playfully. “Yeah, well, I have a better sense of humor.”
--
“That’s--” The reporter tapped her pen against her notepad, her lips moving as she counted each point silently. “Six things so far. You have a lot of things you’d change about yourself.”
“I warned you.” Yoko drummed his fingers against his knee, the tips of his ears turning a bit red. “That’s me.”
“So, what about your strengths?” She smiled, the expression teasing, taking some of the sting out of her earlier words. “If you can name this many things you’d change off the top of your head, there must be things you wouldn’t change that make up for them.”
“Things I wouldn’t change? Well, that one’s pretty easy.” She cocked her head to the side and gave him a curious look. “My friends.”
“Your friends?”
He looked up to meet her eyes and smiled. “Yes. Definitely my friends. I’d say they’re one of the best things about me.”