(no subject)
Let me start by saying that I am shocking myself right now by doing this. I have not updated this thing in 4 months. But I guess the boredom has finally hit me like a brick. Its hard to start going into how I feel, and why I feel it, because you never know who reads this. But then, one of my best friends from high school uses this everynight to tell how she feels about this dickwad who dumped her without telling her. I found that her telling how she felt everyday, with a true consistancy, incredibly brave. She says a lot of the same thing every night, but maybe we all sorrta have to say the same things over and over again. I miss school, a lot. There, thats what I think about all the time. There is such a respect factor at hofstra, that I have never felt in anyother part of my life. I have known some people there for no more then a year, but I feel like I have shown to them who I really am, and what I really feel. I also miss summer. Everyone is home, and out of school and theres the pool, and there is frivolous acting. This break has been like Limbo, I am stuck between these two places. I mean I have done a lot of fun things...like see every movie out there. Here let me rate the movies I have seen in the theatre this vacation from my favorite to least: 1. Match Point 2. King Kong 3. Walk the Line 4. Capote 5. Good Night and Good Luck 6. Pride and Prejudice 7. Chronicles of Narnia 8. Syriana 9. Brokeback Mountain 10. The Producers. Want any information about any of those 10 movies? let me know, leave a message. But realizing just now that I have seen 10 movies? THERE IS NOTHING ELSE TO DO HERE! I haven't danced, I haven't drank (not that I should because I am underage and driving everywhere), I haven't really felt great since I have been home. And I am not a depressed person. I performed once, and that was 4 weeks ago (and it was GREAT). I need a show, I need something to sink my teeth into. God help me if I am ever out of work for a long period of time! But I just miss so many different things! Coming home to 3 guys who care about you every night, throwing parties with these great people every weekend. Going to lunch everyday knowing there are going to be interesting people. I spend everyday till at least 7 at night with my mom at home. Shes intersting...but she tells the same stories over and over again (i'll tell ya all at cabaret) Home is good too though. Today, I got my eyebrows waxed. Its a long story, and if you want to really hear it, ask. But you all need to know, that HURTS. But afterward? I looked good...it may sound entirely insane, but after all that pain, I felt better. Yes, I am still a hetrosexual male. And no I did not like Brokeback the least because I am homophobic. I just didn't believe the love story. I have a good argument if anyone really wants to hear it. Despite the boredom, I have spent a lot of time with my best friend Andy, even though I let him down by not going to see his imporv show. but the reason I didn't go was because I couldn't bare to go alone. I just get so lonely. I see people, but like one day a week now. At the begining of vacation it was different. I threw some huge great parties, seeing all the people I missed, but now the biggest thrill for me is going to Best Buy to purchase more itunes cards so I can download more music. Or today? the highlight? An hour long TV show, that I waited all day for, I mean Lost is good, but its not THAT good. Yesterday, I saw a movie, I was confused but at least I left the house, but durring the day? I watched Out of Africa, anyone who has ever seen that movie KNOWS how boring that is! And speaking of boring movies, its like I found every single one! I watched Dances with Wolves, The English Patient, Vanity Fair (TALK ABOUT CRAP), Annie Hall (I liked it...but its over rated) and Out of Africa. This is not to say i didn't see Driving Miss Daisy (which I very much liked), Dirty Dozen and For a Few Dollars More (might I say that spagetti westerns are my new fix). But still, movies can only go so far. I just am so bored of doing absolutely nothing. And love? Well thats a WHOLE NEW CAN OF WORMS. You want that story? your gonna have to ask, because thats a weird one. Its all about falling for the WRONG girl. Even saying that I feel like I am going to hurt people. Which is what really sucks, I feel like I have really hurt someone at this point. But I gave it a try, a good try and it just didn't work. We've all been there, and I now start to realize that there are girls in my life that have been there with me. (Karma is real and it is here to bite you in the ASS) I just... I miss school, but when I get there I will miss home. But there will be a few moments of absolute joy. Thats what I have come to terms with, I am living from Joy to Joy, and no matter what lays between, I know there will be more Joy. There will be more sorrow, but there will always be more Joy. I love what I plan to be, I love my friends, I love who I am as a person. But right now? I am bored as hell.
The man stuck on the North Shore,
Jeremy
p.s.
A - AVAILABLE?: Usually
B - BEST FRIEND: Andy / Jordan
C - CRUSH: Ahh well isn't that ALWAYS an issue
D- DADS NAME: Alan...now isn't that a great insight into who I am as a person!
E - EASIEST PERSON TO TALK TO: ahhh... Mark, Quinn and Nik (hope Charlie will be on that list)
F- FAVORITE BAND?: Billy Joel and Pink Floyd
G - GUMMY BEARS OR WORMS: worms...theres more to them, and you don't feel as guilty
H - HOMETOWN: Boxford Massachusetts...you have never heard of it, I guarentee it!
I - INSTRUMENT: my voice...I like to think
K - KIDS: I love kids! Anything at all *can* and *does* happen... Same with wives, for that matter... ~ Dr. Ian Malcolm
L - LONGEST CAR RIDE: just when the quiz started to have some meaning...South Carolina
M - MILK FLAVOR?: Vanilla, no matter how disgusting it sounds, I like it
N - NUMBER OF SIBLINGS: 1...you want crazy stories? ask me how shes been this vacation
O - ONE WISH: aahh I am gonna be selfish on this one and say, to Make It. but for all you selfless people...World Peace
P - PHOBIA(S): Loneliness
Q - FAVORITE QUOTE?: Leave the gun. Take the cannolis. ~Godfather
R - REASON TO SMILE: A party i'm throwing where everyone is having a good time S - SONG YOU LAST HEARD: Theme from "The Good, The Bad and The Ugly"
T - TIME YOU WOKE UP AT: 11:20 am
U - UNKNOWN FACT ABOUT ME: I listen to Rhapsody in Blue nearly every night so I can fall asleep
V - VEGETABLE YOU HATE: Spiniach, its just sloppy
W- WORST HABITS: rubbing my nose when I am nervous or anxious (watch for it)
X - X-RAYS YOU'VE HAD: Teeth, thats it, I was a sturdy little kid, not very injury prone
Y - YUMMY FOOD: I have grown a strong liking for Potato Skins
Z - ZODIAC SIGN: Leo...very me