Love the concept and the characterisation, I'm certainly looking forward to read more. One point though: after months back in Whales, I think you mean Wales unless Ianto has started living in the largest mammal on earth that is often mistaken for a fish. He's a quirky guy, he may've done, but Wales seems more likely.
Thanks for the catch! Though, I suppose I could write a story in which Jack and Ianto find themselves inside a whale... maybe Jack has a Pinocchio kink. ;)
That is begging to be written now. If you're feeling in a particularly Christmassy mood you could perhaps write it for me as an early Christmas present? *puppydogeyes* I can actually see them being stuck in there with a pile of tinsel that they use to make the Whale sneeze them out!
Wow-- I love the wry, world-aware tone this has. You've managed to capture that and still keep the echantment of Torchwood, the human vulnerability underneath. And I loved Jack's little persimmon monologue. Very much somethign Jack would say!
In the fortieth second since Ianto has spotted him, Jack looks up and smiles. To his left, Ianto hears the tight, hollow staccato of a dozen pigeons lifting off the pavement, inhales the sharp, savory odor of a nearby kabob stand mixed with the rain-damp gutter, exhales, and falls madly into inadvisable love.
ok i love it good setup and the bit at the beginning has me very intrigued also, i don't think your ianto is OOC, given that the timeline is as messed up as it is, if there is a large space of time between 'cyberwoman' and 'countrycide' it may, very well go AU, though
yep, i just read that part, too how much 'middle' is missing? relatively the same length as the other 2 parts or way way longer? since i am now a master *coughcough* at writing things out of order, i'd be glad to help you go through your plot and whatever else you need
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after months back in Whales,
I think you mean Wales unless Ianto has started living in the largest mammal on earth that is often mistaken for a fish. He's a quirky guy, he may've done, but Wales seems more likely.
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You have my mind running overdrive now!
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I can't wait for more.
-Meredith
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Well, worth to be able to get out the last part, I guess.
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In the fortieth second since Ianto has spotted him, Jack looks up and smiles. To his left, Ianto hears the tight, hollow staccato of a dozen pigeons lifting off the pavement, inhales the sharp, savory odor of a nearby kabob stand mixed with the rain-damp gutter, exhales, and falls madly into inadvisable love.
This is so beautiful. Will there be more?
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If you read the synopsis of the unfinished portion, the whole story does make sense.
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i love it
good setup and the bit at the beginning has me very intrigued
also, i don't think your ianto is OOC, given that the timeline is as messed up as it is, if there is a large space of time between 'cyberwoman' and 'countrycide'
it may, very well go AU, though
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how much 'middle' is missing? relatively the same length as the other 2 parts or way way longer?
since i am now a master *coughcough* at writing things out of order, i'd be glad to help you go through your plot and whatever else you need
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