Hi,I know I'm way to late for feedback, but I still wanted to post that I appreciate your post. Loved the line at the end that every word and description needs to earn their place on the page. Good one to remember. I'm not sure that I've accomplished that here, but I will keep working on it.
Susan woke up as her mom banged on the door. What day is it? she thought as she glanced at the calendar. Why can’t it be Saturday? “Shake a leg girl! Carl will be here before you know it.” “I’m up, I’m up.” Susan forced herself out of bed. Her new Partridge Family sheets were coming undone and she didn’t want to take time to remake the bed so she flung the covers over quickly, grabbed her jeans and a t-shirt and headed to the bathroom. “Good lord! Comb that hair. You can’t go to school like that.” “I know, I will. Oatmeal again?” Susan played with her spoon while her mind started to wake up and remind her of her problem. What was she going to do? “Good morning Mrs. Spencer.” Carl smiled through the screen door. “Oh, hi Carl, come on in. As soon as Susan sucks up some of that oatmeal ya’ll can head out.” Susan gave Carl the eyes and then shoved one big spoonful in as she pushed her chair back and rose to follow him out the door. “Good luck on your project Susan. You two have a good day!” Susan let the screen door slam behind her and rolled her eyes. “So you have it all figured out then?” Carl asked. “No.” Susan walked on silently. “You’ve got time. Remember Mrs. Williams said she was going to be out the next few days. The sub won’t know about it.” “That’s a relief.” As they got to the end of Bernadine Street and turned right onto Rushing Road, other kids started leaving their houses too. They walked in groups of two or three unless there were a lot of siblings like the O’Neil family. Everyone was on the left side of the street. That’s where the sidewalk was. Carl had left Susan to her thoughts and raced to catch up with David who was on his baseball team. That was okay with Susan. She didn’t feel like chatting this morning. She would kick a rock if one got in her way and sometimes she balanced on the curb. Mostly she was looking down. She had been walking this way to school for five years and knew the way. But today when she happened to look up and to the right she saw a girl walking alone. She hadn’t seen her before. She brought her eyes down before she could catch her staring. “Hurry up, “Carl yelled. “It’s ten minutes until the bell.”
Susan woke up as her mom banged on the door. What day is it? she thought as she glanced at the calendar. Why can’t it be Saturday?
“Shake a leg girl! Carl will be here before you know it.”
“I’m up, I’m up.”
Susan forced herself out of bed. Her new Partridge Family sheets were coming undone and she didn’t want to take time to remake the bed so she flung the covers over quickly, grabbed her jeans and a t-shirt and headed to the bathroom.
“Good lord! Comb that hair. You can’t go to school like that.”
“I know, I will. Oatmeal again?”
Susan played with her spoon while her mind started to wake up and remind her of her problem. What was she going to do?
“Good morning Mrs. Spencer.” Carl smiled through the screen door.
“Oh, hi Carl, come on in. As soon as Susan sucks up some of that oatmeal ya’ll can head out.”
Susan gave Carl the eyes and then shoved one big spoonful in as she pushed her chair back and rose to follow him out the door.
“Good luck on your project Susan. You two have a good day!”
Susan let the screen door slam behind her and rolled her eyes.
“So you have it all figured out then?” Carl asked.
“No.” Susan walked on silently.
“You’ve got time. Remember Mrs. Williams said she was going to be out the next few days. The sub won’t know about it.”
“That’s a relief.”
As they got to the end of Bernadine Street and turned right onto Rushing Road, other kids started leaving their houses too. They walked in groups of two or three unless there were a lot of siblings like the O’Neil family. Everyone was on the left side of the street. That’s where the sidewalk was. Carl had left Susan to her thoughts and raced to catch up with David who was on his baseball team. That was okay with Susan. She didn’t feel like chatting this morning. She would kick a rock if one got in her way and sometimes she balanced on the curb. Mostly she was looking down. She had been walking this way to school for five years and knew the way. But today when she happened to look up and to the right she saw a girl walking alone. She hadn’t seen her before. She brought her eyes down before she could catch her staring.
“Hurry up, “Carl yelled. “It’s ten minutes until the bell.”
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