(no subject)
i think that im passive aggressive or whatever cause i get mad and then i just dont care about it anymore. well actually i never really get mad at all. im mad for like 5 minutes and im not even like raving mad i get like annoyed more. today keara just pissed me off though becasue i go to her im like oh im gonna smack you why are you so quiet today and i was kidding and i say that to her all the time and she just gives me a dirty look and walks away. seriously its shit like that that makes me hate even knowing her. cause ive dealt with her shit for so long i kinda want a little something too. even if im pissed off i tell her so she knows to stay away from me im never purposely mean or bitchy to one of my friends without good reason like they did something to me. or they said something to me. i just thought that was bullshit. ive decided to just stop caring because no matter what i do its not going to change her or anything. i wanted to talk to someone about it but i guess its just me and my LJ since i doubt anyone wants to hear me whine. i came home today and i had such a bad stomach ache it was like the worst ive ever had it was short but omgg. it felt like someone just was stabbing me in my stomach. i think its from the cold. i wanted to make hot chocolate but theres no milk :/ figures. today i had a relatively good day i guess. i wish i could do things different everyday. it jsut feels soo monotonous if thats even hwo you spell it. im sick of doing the same thing everyday and feeling the same way everyday. im ready for college and change already. at first i thought id be sad to leave this place but i was horribly wrong. i just cant wait to get out of here. thats going to be the happiest day of my life. the sad thing i kinda realized though is as you get older you start loosing friends. i dont want to be alone and friendless. thats just sad you're always bored and lonely talk about being depressive. i always need someone to talk to or have fun with. i love being around people well people that are like normal and fun to hang with. i just want my real life to begin and to start fresh