So this is gonna be one of those, im up early deep livejournal rants, yay

Oct 10, 2006 07:59

So basically Hofstra isn't too bad. I've made friends, not so many enemies yet but im getting pretty close, sweet. But the purpose of this entry ive decided is to imply state the idea; is it better to alter your outside image to make it more appealing to others if only just for a time or is it better for one to stay the way they are since they've grown content to the idea that they have in fact found their own, sort of style. One would naturally assume that the latter would make the most sense, for whats the point of being sumbudy else, even if just for a time, wen u have already worked so hard to grab a hold of a style and personality that was all your own. But do you even need to change your personality? I would assume not, so for the sake of this entry lets assume no. So lets say for this entry, person 1 was tired of the waiting for the one man to just come over and sweep him off his feet becuz he's crazy about the way he is, which i guess in retrospect is kinda dumb to wait for anyways.  I'm sure that one would say to person 1.  Well, what if that's what he does, he puts himself out there to let every1 see not just what he looks like, but his overall persona, which is what makes him different then anybody else.  In that aspect person 1 is really waiting for that man that sees the initial attraction and then a magnificient personality.  However, what if he can never get past the inital attraction becuz no one seems to find him really all that attractive.  But then he worries that wat if they did and it was his personality that drove them away.  In case 1 where no one seems to hav that initial attraction, does the person make himself more aesthetically pleasing, while keeping the same personality?  What if he never saw himself as really all that ugly?  In the overall perspective there's nothing wrong with improving one's image, unless their image is improved by force, but i mean come on who really does that?  But is it really improving one's image if the person was already content with the way they looked before?  So therefore its not improving one's image but changing it, which of course, theres no shame in that idea either.  But either way, one would feel hurt to have to change their image which he/she always approved of up until this point?  Only if they really arent pleased, but wat if they still are?  So the overall question is, do we change due to societal impacts on our everyday lives, do we change for our own need to feel self improved, or do we change due to what one or few others may see as "beautiful" where we don't see it ourselves?   I think that everyone, no matter how much they believe they have refused to give into society's overall or just a few's concept of beauty, we all have either contemplated it or done it ourselves.  Even those that strive to be stood out from the crowd are still running by societal standards of beauty since they want to be noticed as not giving in, they do everything that society defines as rebellion.  But we also all try and follow our own sense of style which is what makes each and every one of us stand out in the crowd, to hopefully that one person who found everything they were looking for, or everything they werent.  Should one feel ugly in a certain pair of shoes if they never felt ugly in them before?  Doesn't seem to make much sense.  I guess the question remains unanswered though, of course opinion questions dont really ever get answered unless by one or a few, but for my sake i dont know who id rather prefer.  Yes id like a guy to say im beautiful, but i wouldnt want to have to go out of my way to make him see beauty in me, id want him to see it they way that i am, my own concept of beauty.  For if two concepts of beautiful are alligned, shouldnt that make a perfect match?  Who knows?  I guess since I've never really saw myself as that ugly before, i don't really feel the need to change who i am, even if thats the only way to meet sum here, but i think that im content with the way i look, and nobody has ever told me otherwise, not that anyone should tell me wat to do with this and that.  But i feel that in my natural element, well most of it at least, i am happy, and to expect a guy to see something in me which for the first time im starting to see in myself.....does that really sound too crazy?  Maybe im naive, but i guess the question goes for many situations.....should i feel naive just becuz sum1 claims it to be so, or do i continue to believe that i can be wise if my mind is heard, as can many others, and ignore the fact that age does not define wisdom, but more ones ability to see truth when its much easier to view lies.

Anyways that was just a personal rant to myself, if you read it and were all like wtf?  then im sorry, shouldve posted this part in the beginning.  But basically i woke up and they werejust sum thoughts that crossed my mind, dont worry most of this doesnt strongly pertain to stuff at hofstra, but it kinda doez, in certain aspects.  But either way, im gonna go back to bed for awhile cuz i have math today..............damn
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