Back to the ocean, a child of the sea...
It started a bit bumpy, but I'm finally starting to enjoy being at the beach. I don't think my brain was properly in vacation mode; too many appointments, trying to organize too many things, trying to keep on track of too many prescriptions. I still work my full-time job as well as see private clients on Saturdays, but my weekday mornings subsist of my parents and their appointments and trying to make sure everything is working as best as it can.
It could be somewhat daunting to others; thankfully, this is a role I've been preparing for since I was in seventh grade. We've come to the point where they do trust me with their medical care. However, trying to unearth their medical care makes me somewhat batty at times. They only saw their PCP and pain management doctors, so we're going through the ropes of specialists and consultants. One thing gets handled, and another pops up. For example, her new pain management doctor wanted an MRI and X-ray due to all of the surgeries. So, we did that. Then the pain management doctor saw something on the imaging, so we had to go to the PCP for him to tell us what he saw. He saw some type of mass, so ordered a CT scan. After drinking a lot of barium, we did that. So I got the phone call that there was nothing abnormal in the scan, so that crisis was averted.
Granted, I got this phone call while I was in urgent care in Ocean City, having somehow contracted poison oak and bringing it down with me. Fabulous.
My father, on the other hand, got a phone call from his dermatologist that he wanted me to take. So I called the dermatologist. Apparently, my father has a small melanoma and needs to have surgery to have it removed. I scheduled that consult.
There's part of me that gets not necessarily overwhelmed, but downright frustrated with the status of their medical care. They never followed up. I'm slowly unearthing years of things going awry.
Some of my friends have expressed concern about my taking this on, but I feel weirdly disconnected but totally capable of handling it. The condo rehab was daunting; I had never done an immediate flip like that. But scheduling appointments and keeping track of what they're doing? This seems relatively old hat to me.
I know I haven't written in my planner; I did buy a new one, but it would appear this one went a bit wonky in March. I'll write notes to my future self and try to clear out receipts. At this point, I may not be as militant about my planner as I was, seeing as I'm no longer tracking the third job on a monthly basis, since I resigned from that job. Since Google calendar has become the easiest way to balance my parents' appointments, I know I'm going to back fill in a lot of information.
I see that I have about three more weeks of these appointments. I'm pushing toward finally settling down with my parents in mid-September, and then going over a few mornings a week to drink coffee and watch puppies/kittens on Too Cute. Slowly, I'll work on my house and get things in order; I'm hoping I'll get the umph again to work out and join other classes. My shoulder has been acting up since July 4th, but with the prednisone prescription from the poison oak, that might finally release as well and I can go back to business as usual.
Investigating into my own health benefits, I looked up MRI costs and reached out to my doctor to see about if she still wanted an MRI for my neck. If it is a pinched nerve/slipped disc situation, then I will need surgery. While I'm concerned about this, I know it'll make things much better going forward, but having surgery on my neck still makes me a bit twitchy. I try to rationalize that I need to utilize this good insurance for what I have and get things done.
I briefly flipped through the old planner this morning, trying to check in on my goals that I had set at the beginning of this year. Amazingly, I have accomplished some of the goals I put in place, like quitting the third job or traveling on cash. I have made some health progress, though it slips and dives more now that my parents are in town. However, mental health-wise, Fidget has noticed that I seem happier and my parents seem a bit more stable and sober since moving up here. We're all adjusting to seeing each other so often, and slowly redefining how we fit in each others' lives. But it still seems as though progress IS happening, even if it sometimes feels as though we're slowly slouching toward bedlam.
Right now, however, I'm enjoying the rain on the beach, freshly showered and blonder hair, and sitting in the semi-dark while perusing through things to get myself into. We'll head home tomorrow, back into the cacophony. I'll have two days of work, then back to the practice. It'll all kick up again. But tonight and tomorrow morning, this is still vacation, and that is what I need right now. My parents are fine for the moment; my father had melanoma yesterday and will have it tomorrow. They'll have their ups and downs and we're all doing our best to manage it...
... it seems as though a brighter light is developing out of the balance that I hadn't thought would be possible.
It could be somewhat daunting to others; thankfully, this is a role I've been preparing for since I was in seventh grade. We've come to the point where they do trust me with their medical care. However, trying to unearth their medical care makes me somewhat batty at times. They only saw their PCP and pain management doctors, so we're going through the ropes of specialists and consultants. One thing gets handled, and another pops up. For example, her new pain management doctor wanted an MRI and X-ray due to all of the surgeries. So, we did that. Then the pain management doctor saw something on the imaging, so we had to go to the PCP for him to tell us what he saw. He saw some type of mass, so ordered a CT scan. After drinking a lot of barium, we did that. So I got the phone call that there was nothing abnormal in the scan, so that crisis was averted.
Granted, I got this phone call while I was in urgent care in Ocean City, having somehow contracted poison oak and bringing it down with me. Fabulous.
My father, on the other hand, got a phone call from his dermatologist that he wanted me to take. So I called the dermatologist. Apparently, my father has a small melanoma and needs to have surgery to have it removed. I scheduled that consult.
There's part of me that gets not necessarily overwhelmed, but downright frustrated with the status of their medical care. They never followed up. I'm slowly unearthing years of things going awry.
Some of my friends have expressed concern about my taking this on, but I feel weirdly disconnected but totally capable of handling it. The condo rehab was daunting; I had never done an immediate flip like that. But scheduling appointments and keeping track of what they're doing? This seems relatively old hat to me.
I know I haven't written in my planner; I did buy a new one, but it would appear this one went a bit wonky in March. I'll write notes to my future self and try to clear out receipts. At this point, I may not be as militant about my planner as I was, seeing as I'm no longer tracking the third job on a monthly basis, since I resigned from that job. Since Google calendar has become the easiest way to balance my parents' appointments, I know I'm going to back fill in a lot of information.
I see that I have about three more weeks of these appointments. I'm pushing toward finally settling down with my parents in mid-September, and then going over a few mornings a week to drink coffee and watch puppies/kittens on Too Cute. Slowly, I'll work on my house and get things in order; I'm hoping I'll get the umph again to work out and join other classes. My shoulder has been acting up since July 4th, but with the prednisone prescription from the poison oak, that might finally release as well and I can go back to business as usual.
Investigating into my own health benefits, I looked up MRI costs and reached out to my doctor to see about if she still wanted an MRI for my neck. If it is a pinched nerve/slipped disc situation, then I will need surgery. While I'm concerned about this, I know it'll make things much better going forward, but having surgery on my neck still makes me a bit twitchy. I try to rationalize that I need to utilize this good insurance for what I have and get things done.
I briefly flipped through the old planner this morning, trying to check in on my goals that I had set at the beginning of this year. Amazingly, I have accomplished some of the goals I put in place, like quitting the third job or traveling on cash. I have made some health progress, though it slips and dives more now that my parents are in town. However, mental health-wise, Fidget has noticed that I seem happier and my parents seem a bit more stable and sober since moving up here. We're all adjusting to seeing each other so often, and slowly redefining how we fit in each others' lives. But it still seems as though progress IS happening, even if it sometimes feels as though we're slowly slouching toward bedlam.
Right now, however, I'm enjoying the rain on the beach, freshly showered and blonder hair, and sitting in the semi-dark while perusing through things to get myself into. We'll head home tomorrow, back into the cacophony. I'll have two days of work, then back to the practice. It'll all kick up again. But tonight and tomorrow morning, this is still vacation, and that is what I need right now. My parents are fine for the moment; my father had melanoma yesterday and will have it tomorrow. They'll have their ups and downs and we're all doing our best to manage it...
... it seems as though a brighter light is developing out of the balance that I hadn't thought would be possible.