(no subject)
5 years ago i was in the biggest rut of my life. I put all my horrible feelings, tears, pain, hate, into stupid drugs and bad habits cause i hated every thing about me. Then, i was alone one night and thinking about the worst thing i could possibly do to myself.. but i had two best friends that came to help me out.I have been doing so good. Changed you can say. I may have a depression slip some times but you have no idea how strong i have tried to be. One those to friends was my best friend bianca.. me and her have been best friends for 6 years... and she has never left my side till this day.. and the other one was sarah. Unfortunatley while beeing sarah's roomate... she started changing... after everything she has seen me go through.. she fell into everything i did.. andthen it got worse. she was abusive. she stole money from me.. her friends stole my mac book.. and old sk 3 and a camera. she broke my things... so i moved...
an hr ago i got a call saying she attempted suicide...and is in icu. Her boyfriend that she told me she hated me for...attempted suicide and he succeeded. I just lost one of my closest friends a month ago... the thought of someone taking the life they have kills me.
15 minutes ago i called her to tell her, i love her and i am glad she made it through.
its the worst feeling in the world... after 6 years of helping someone through everything and then in three months of not being friends.. not being able to help her with the biggest problem of all.
we probably wont be friends again, but i never stopped loving the sarah who was my best friend.. i just hated the person she was changing into.
tomorrow i go visit her, wish me luck.
and to all of my friends out there, i love you so much. I would do anything for you guys and i cherish every moment i have with you. whether its suicide or accidents i have had many deathsthis year.... and i regret ever trying to do stupid things to myself.
thank you for everyone who is always there for me.
an hr ago i got a call saying she attempted suicide...and is in icu. Her boyfriend that she told me she hated me for...attempted suicide and he succeeded. I just lost one of my closest friends a month ago... the thought of someone taking the life they have kills me.
15 minutes ago i called her to tell her, i love her and i am glad she made it through.
its the worst feeling in the world... after 6 years of helping someone through everything and then in three months of not being friends.. not being able to help her with the biggest problem of all.
we probably wont be friends again, but i never stopped loving the sarah who was my best friend.. i just hated the person she was changing into.
tomorrow i go visit her, wish me luck.
and to all of my friends out there, i love you so much. I would do anything for you guys and i cherish every moment i have with you. whether its suicide or accidents i have had many deathsthis year.... and i regret ever trying to do stupid things to myself.
thank you for everyone who is always there for me.